


Quinn, Season 3

by WildDogJJ



Category: Daria (Cartoon), Daria (Fandom)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:02:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 74,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24304120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WildDogJJ/pseuds/WildDogJJ
Summary: The third season of my spin off about Quinn's life after the conclusion of "Daria".  Set six years after "Is It College Yet?".
Relationships: Quinn Morgendorffer/Original Male Character, Stacy Rowe/Charles "Upchuck" Ruttheimer III, Tom Sloane/Original Female Character(s)





	1. Chapter 1

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Rage of Aquarius"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Morgendorffer House, evening...**

Jake, Helen, Quinn and Jim were having Sunday dinner at the kitchen table. The food is clams, shrimp, scallops and prawns in spicy tomato sauce served over linguine with a huge plate of antipasto as a side dish.

"Thanks for having me over for dinner" said Jim.

"Our pleasure, Jim" Helen replied.

After helping himself to more food, Jake said "Especially since you made dinner and showed me how to make...What's this called, again?"

"Linguine Pescatore" said Jim. "It's one of my grandmother's old recipes. The salad is called antipasto."

Beaming, Quinn said "I can't believe I have a boyfriend who's such a talented cook. This is great, honey."

Shrugging, Jim said "Benefits of growing up in an Italian-American family."

The young couple smiled at each other while Jake and Helen exchange knowing glances.

To Jake, Helen whispered "They really remind me of us at that age."

Not bothering to whisper, Jake said "Yeah! I remember those good old days. The days when we thought we'd change the world. Before the corporate fat cats got their claws into us and made us sell out and become JUST ANOTHER COG IN THE WAR PIGS MACHINE AND..."

Quinn sprang into action.

"Dad, your heart!"

This snapped Jake out of his impending rant.

"Thanks, sweetie. Helen, remember those days?"

Thinking back fondly to her and Jake's days as hippies in the late 60's and early 70's, Helen said "We were so full of idealism back then. I remember how Willow first turned me on to The Movement."

Quinn rolled her eyes while Jim listened intently.

Remembering those days past, Jake said "I remember when Tempest figured me out from my star sign, or the time Sunflower thought the CIA was out to kill us."

"Remember Cosmo and Red Wolf?" Helen asked.

"Yeah!" Jake recalled excitedly, "Those guys were crazy as hell."

"Who are those guys?" asked Quinn, "Friends from your hippie days?"

"Yes" Helen answered as she fondly remembered the people just mentioned. "We were all so close back then. It was the eight of us against the whole world."

Becoming engrossed in the nostalgia trip, Jim said "Sounds like you were all one big family."

"We were" Jake admitted. "Oh, is that ever a great story!"

Jim was visibly curious, which worried Quinn.

"Jim, why are you encouraging them to embarrass me?"

Jim said "One: they're your parents and probably don't need my encouragement. Two: that time in our history always fascinated me. Don't worry, I won't judge you based on what they did back then."

Quinn was relieved.

"Thanks, babe."

"As I was saying" said Jake, "it was my first semester of college..."

* * *

 **Middleton College, 1968...**  
 **Music:** "As The World Turns" by

Eighteen year old Jake Morgendorffer and his roommate were hanging out in their dorm. Jake was wearing a dress shirt and tie with pressed pants and his hair was a military buzzcut. His roommate, Steve, was a blond preppie dressed like it's still the fifties.

Jake (from 2006): _I was eager to learn about the world. I soon realized I knew nothing. Blame it on my having spent the previous seven years locked in the concentration camp known as military school...forced marching...formation at 0500...taunts from the other cadets...being made to eat MY DRESS SOCKS WHILE THAT SADISTIC CORPORAL ELLENBOGEN WOULD.._

Quinn (from 2006): _Dad, triple bypass!_

_Thanks, honey. Anyway, that nightmare was finally over. I was a college man now._

Steve was looking out the window when he spotted something.

"Hey, Jake, check it out."

Young Jake joined Steve at the window.

Pointing toward the quad, Steve said "Those hippie chicks are hot!"

On the quad passing by the dorm were 18 year old versions of Helen and Willow talking while they walk to class.

Steve instantly called out to them.

"HEY, DOLLS, HOW ABOUT GIVING ME AND MY BUDDY HERE SOME OF THAT FREE LOVE?"

Helen and Willow tried to ignore him.

To a nervous Jake, Steve said "Come on, Jake. Don't be a square."

Jake looked at the two girls and joined Steve in the cat-calling.

"YEAH, BABES, SHAKE THOSE SWEET ASSES!" Turning to Steve, Jake asked "How's that?"

This got the attention of Helen and Willow, neither of whom were impressed.

"Pigs" muttered Willow.

"Chauvanistic jerks" added Helen.

Steve called out "SO, YOU GONNA COME UP HERE, OR WHAT? WE'RE BOTH LOVE STARVED MEN WHO WANNA GET SOME."

Willow shouted back "SHUT UP, YOU ESTABLISHMENT DWEEBS!"

Not wanting to look like a wuss, Jake said "COME ON, HIPPIE CHICKS PUT OUT. SO COME UP HERE AND PUT OUT, BABY."

Helen shouted "IN YOUR DREAMS, YOU FACIST WAR PIG!"

Jake took one look at Helen and was totally smitten.

_Something about the passion in your mother's voice when she said that got to me._

Jake's silence emboldened Helen.

"YEAH, NOT SO TOUGH NOW, ARE YOU?"

Helen and Willow started to walk away.

Watching them leave, Steve called out "HEY, GOT FRIES TO GO WITH THAT SHAKE?"

Helen gave him the one-fingered salute as she and Willow continued on their way.

* * *

**The quad, later that day...**

Jake was on his way back from class. As he crossed the quad he was spotted by Helen. Still upset from the cat calling, she walked up to give him a piece of her mind.

Getting right in Jake's face, Helen said "Hey, square, I've got a bone to pick with you! What makes you and your buddy think you can talk to women like that?"

Nervous, Jake said "Well, isn't that what I'm supposed to do? Steve told me I wasn't cool if I didn't."

Helen rolled her eyes in disbelief.

"How stupid are you? Don't you know how to treat women with respect?"

Jake looked ashamed. "Actually...no" he admitted. "I don't know how to talk to women. My father always bosses my mother around and she just takes it. I also don't have a lot of first hand experience because I spent the last seven years locked away in an all boys military academy. "

Helen was shocked...and more than a little intrigued.

"You spent your entire teens in military school?"

Shamefaced, Jake admitted "My father wanted to mold me into a soldier. He only let me go to college because I refused to join the army and he doesn't want me to become a hippie. He says all hippies are enemies of freedom."

That explains a lot Helen thought. She said "That's a load of bullshit. I'll prove it to you. Are you busy this evening?"

"No."

"Then why not hang out with us?" Helen suggested, "I can introduce you to my friends and you'll see how wrong your father is."

Jake smiled.

* * *

 **Helen and Willow's dorm, that evening...**  
 **Music:** "My Generation" by The Who

The place was crawling with garish 60's decor. Posters of popular bands, posters of psychedelic art and left-wing political slogans such as "Give Peace a Chance" and "Make Love, Not War". In addition to Jake and Helen were Willow, Coyote (looking like he did in the flashbacks in "That Was Then, This is Dumb"), a woman with wavy black hair and wearing a blue blouse who was meditating alongside another woman with long blonde hair wearing a frilly white gown. There were also two guys hanging around. One had shoulder-length red hair with a beard and was wearing bell-bottom jeans and a Jimi Hendrix T-shirt. The other guy had long, medium brown hair and a Fu Manchu mustache. He's visibly stoned. Jake was apologizing to Willow for his behavior that morning.

"That's alright, Jake, I forgive you" said Willow with a warm smile. "Maybe we can help you get your head straight."

Coyote approached them.

"Coyote" said Willow, "I'd like you to meet Jake. He's eager to learn our ways."

Coyote shook Jake's hand.

"Cool, man. Let me introduce you around."

He lead Jake to the woman who's meditating.

"This is our spiritual advisor, Tempest."

Jake hel out his hand in greeting, but Tempest kept her eyes closed.

"Hi, I'm Jake."

Tempest said nothing as she continued to meditate.

"Ohmm, ohmmm, ohmmm, ohmmm..."

Jake was puzzled by this.

"Um, Tempest...Hello?"

Tempest opened her eyes and was visibly irritated at the interruption.

"Do you mind? I'm trying to commune with the cosmic infinite."

Jake was impressed.

"Hey, that sounds pretty neat-o."

Tempest resumed her meditation. At this point, the girl with long blond hair approached.

""Neat-o"?" said the blond, "That sounds like square talk, you one of them?"

Confused, Jake asked "Who's them?"

With a mix of exasperation and paranoia in her voice, the blond said "You know, THEM: the man, the establishment, the pigs ruining this country."

Coyote explained "Sunflower, this is Jake, he wants to learn about us." To Jake, he said "You'll have to forgive Sunflower, she's a little paranoid."

Sunflower said "It's not paranoia when it's true. Open your eyes, man. They wanna turn us all into mindless drones for the war machine."

Coyote lead Jake to the two guys. Pointing to the one with red hair and a beard, he said "This is Red Wolf. If you want good tunes, he's the go-to man. Red Wolf, this is Jake."

Jake and Red Wolf shook hands.

"What's happenin', man?"

Jake said "Just getting to know everyone." Pointing to Red Wolf's shirt, he asked "Who's that?"

Red Wolf's eyes went wide.

"You mean you never heard of Hendrix, man? Dude, you'll love his tunes, they're a happenin' trip!"

Coyote pointed out the stoned one.

"Our resident philosopher, Cosmo."

Barely coherant, Cosmo muttered "In a goddadavida...I...I...waitin' f'r 'u...don' need no wh'th'rman t' know way th' wind blo...bl...blow."

Jake was baffled.

Seeing the baffled expression, Coyote explained "Actually, we don't know what he's sayin' a lot of the time, either. We just know that it's really deep."

Helen approached them.

"So, Jake, what do you think?"

Jake said "You guys are interesting. What do I have to do to join?"

"Nothin', man" said Coyote. "Just be yourself."

Jake frowned.

"I...I'm not sure who I am. I was always told do this, be this, think that, say that."

Speaking in a reassuring voice, Helen said "Well, if you hang with us those days are over. We're all free to find ourselves here."

Jake liked the sound of that. "Groovy" he said. "It's groovy, right?"

Helen smiled, then looked at Jake's neatly preppy clothes.

"We gotta do something about those threads."

Coyote said "I got some stuff left here from the other day. Come on, Jake."

A few minutes later...

Jake was wearing the outfit he usually wears in flashbacks to his hippie days. He liked his new look.

"Groovy!"

**Morgendorffer dining room, 2006...**

Jake was telling the story to Quinn and Jim.

"For the first time in my life I felt accepted. They never hazed me, never bullied me. I became a true believer."

"That's really cool" said Jim.

Helen said "Remember your first act of protest, Jake?"

Jake's eyes brightened. "Yeah!"

* * *

**Middleton College, 1968...**

There's a huge protest on campus. Demonstrators were chanting while holding signs. The signs had slogans such as "Free Speech", "No Justice, No Peace", and "Silence Is Tyranny".

Helen (Vo from 2006): _"The administration censored the school paper, Middleton Musings, in an effort to make it a piece of pro-war, pro-segregation propaganda. We, along with a growning number of students, felt that the school was trying to stamp out free speech and made it known, but the administration saw it differently. They felt that being anti-war and anti-racism was un-American."_

At the campus administration, the dean adamantly said "I will not bow to these communist traitors."

At the office of Middleton Musings a bunch of students were barracading the entrance.

The situation got so tense that your father decided we needed to take over the school paper in order to force change. I thought it was a good idea.

In the main office Jake, Helen, Willow, Coyote, Tempest, Sunflower, Red Wolf and Cosmo had barracaded themselves. While Jake's hair was still relatively short he'd obviously been growing it out and he now had long sideburns.

"Jake" said Helen, "This is far out. Your first act of civil disobedience."

"I know" Jake beamed proudly, "I'm finally sticking it to the man!"

Tempest, who was sitting cross-legged on the desk, said "Do you mind!? I'm trying to get some meditation in!" She then closed her eyes and began to chant. "Hare Kirishna, Hare Karishna.."

At this point, Helen walked to the window and spoke to the crowd through a bullhorn.

"WHAT DO WE WANT!"

"FREEDOM OF SPEECH!" the crowd outside chanted back.

"WHEN DO WE WANT IT!"

"NOW!!!"

Inside the office, Sunflower paced nervously.

"Oh, man! Oh, man! OH, MAN!"

Coyote tried to calm her down.

"Sunflower, chill, will ya!"

Sunflower said "HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT!?! They're gonna get us for this. The man's probably stationing snipers on the roof to kill us all right now!"

Willow told her "Sunflower, I really don't think they'll kill us over this."

Added Red Wolf "Yeah, babe. You worry too much."

Cosmo, with bloodshot eyes and a lit joint in his mouth, mumbled "Ya...you...you say you wnnna...r'v'loution..."

Outside, the dean, flanked by security stood before the crowd and spoke through a bullhorn.

"ALRIGHT! YOU'VE ALL MADE YOUR POINT! FROM NOW ON POLITICAL SPEECH WILL NOW LONGER BE CENSORED!" Under his breath, he added "Damn freedom hating hippies."

Everyone cheered.

Inside the office, the whole group of hippies were ecstatic.

"You did it, Jakey," said an excited Helen, "You did it!"

"No, Helen," said Jake, "We did it." Angrily shaking his fist, Jake yelled "TAKE THAT, MAD DOG, YOU SADISTIC TYRANT!!!"

**Morgendorffer house, 2006...**

Helen continued to tell the story.

"We'd fought for something and actually won, and the demonstration had been Jake's idea. I soon felt a strong attraction to your father. Something about him just spoke to me."

 _Just like I feel with Jim_ Quinn thought.

* * *

**Act II**   
**Middleton College, afternoon, 1969...**

Jake, Helen, Willow, Coyote, Cosmo and Red Wolf were hanging out on the quad. By now Jake has grown out his hair to the long mane we've seen in all other flashbacks to his hippie days. Helen stared lovingly at Jake, but he didn't notice.

"You know, man," said Coyote, "I was just thinking about the bible. You know how it says love your neighbor. If we all followed that simple concept we wouldn't even need laws, or the fuzz...and wars wouldn't happen."

Willow was impressed by her boyfriend's insight.

"Wow, that's so deep!"

Clearly stoned, Cosmo muttered "All 'u nee' 's love...m...man."

"Right on" said Helen as she lit a joint.

Smoking his own joint, Red Wolf said "You said it, man. I mean, look at what the pigs are makin' us do in Vietnam. The whole damn war is just facist imperialism."

"You said it" growled a now triggered Jake. "Just brutal old bastards like my old man saying "We gotta kill 'em all" or "Only good commie's a dead commie" or "I'LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF YOU, YOU GUTLESS LITTLE WASTE OF SPERM". WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT, I DON'T BELIEVE IN YOUR FASCIST CONCEPT OF MANHOOD AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT YOU CAN SUCK MY..."

By now Helen had figured out how to deal with Jake's daddy issues.

"JAKE! Mellow out, man."

Jake snapped out of his rant.

"Sorry, I still get worked up when I think about that stuff."

Coyote said "Gotta let that stuff go, man. You can't fight hate with hate, you know."

At this point, Helen looked at her watch.

"I have a class in ten minutes, I gotta split."

Helen got up and left. Jake stared longingly at her as she walked away, which all the others noticed.

"You're totally jonesin' for her, aren't you?" said Red Wolf.

Slightly embarrassed, Jake admitted "Yeah, she's incredible. I...I love her. I just wish I had the nerve to tell her."

Willow got an idea.

"Come with me, Jake."

With that, Jake and Willow left. Once they were gone Coyote pulled a small pipe out of his pocket and put some hash in it.

"Yo, Red Wolf, fire me up, man."

Red Wolf lit Coyote's hash pipe.

* * *

**Tempest and Sunflower's dorm room, a short time later...**

Tempest was meditating while Sunflower paced nervously.

"I'm telling you, they wanna kill me" she said. Obviously, Sunflower was having another one of her paranoia fits. "The CIA wants me dead because I figured out that they killed JFK. They can read my thoughts with satellites, they know. They know!"

Tempest tried her damndest to drown Sunflower out.

"Hare Karishna. Hare Karishna. HARE KARISHNA!"

She finally gave up and opened her eyes.

"Thanks a lot, Sunflower! I was about to attain enlightenement when you had to start another one of your rants."

Sunflower blushed with embarrassment.

"Sorry."

There's a knock on the door.

"Come in" said Tempest.

Jake and Willow entered the room.

"Tempest" said Willow, "Jake needs to talk to you."

"Seeking enlightenment, huh." said the wannabe priestess, "What do you wanna know, Jake?"

Jake sheepishly explained "Well, I'm falling hard for Helen. Are we, you know, compatable?"

"When's your birthday?" Tempest asked.

"January 8th."

"Capricorn, huh." After a few seconds of thought, Tempest added "Well, Helen's a Cancer. She's very focused and determined, has very powerful convictions and once she commits to something there's no turning back. You, by contrast, are very bipolar: euphorically happy one moment, morbidly depressed the next. You are also easily distracted and prone to being manipulated."

Jake was amazed that Tempest had him figured out to a T.

"Wow! So, are me and Helen compatable?"

Tempest said "Strangely enough, yes. Your differences compliment each other. She's a natural leader while you are a born follower. She would keep you on track and help you find your way. You would remind her of other things when she gets too focused on one. The downside is that there would still be a lot of conflict."

Jake looked a little deflated.

* * *

**Washington,DC Summer 1969...**

Jake (VO from 2006): _"That summer, we went to Washington to protest for change. We really believed we could change the world."_

 **Music:** "Somebody To Love" by Jefferson Airplane

We see a montage scene. First, we see Jake and Helen handing out flowers. A straight laced guy spits in their face and Jake wants to beat him up, but Helen calms him down. They exchange loving stares. Next, we see Willow and Coyote painting psychedelic murals on the sidewalk. This is followed by a shot of Cosmo getting stoned while Red Wolf and Tempest dance provocativley with each other and Sunflower glances around nervously. Next, a cop breaks up the dance and Sunflower runs away in terror. Next, we see the guys burn their draft cards in front of a recruiting station while the girls cheer them on.

_Don't you want somebody to love_   
_Don't you need somebody to love_

Jake and Helen exchange endearing smiles.

_Don't you want somebody to love_

Cut to a shot of everyone dancing naked on the Washington Mall.

_You gotta find somebody to love_

Next, we see Jake angrily kick the side of the Pentagon. Finally, we see them in the crowd at an anti-war rally on the Washington Mall.

* * *

**Washington Mall, night...**

All of the peace ralliers were camping out and partying on the Washington Mall, some were going into tents to do what horny young prople do. Amidst all of this Jake and Helen were sitting on a towel and watching everything. Jake had crutches and was in a cast due to his angry kick at the Pentagon earlier that day.

"I'm sorry I lost my temper like that" said Jake. "I know I need to let go of the past, but I just can't. The abuse I suffered from Mad Dog and those psychos at Buxton Ridge still haunts me."

Helen put an arm around Jake's shoulders.

"That's alright, Jake. Considering how hellish your childhood was you've every right to have issues. We're all here for you."

Jake looked into Helen's eyes.

"Thanks, Helen."

Helen asked "Jake, what are you going to do after college?"

"Start my own business" said Jake. "I want to show everyone that you don't have to rape the earth to be a success. You?"

Helen said "Law school. I want to prove a woman can be just as good a lawyer as any man. I also want to change the system from the inside."

Jake was completely taken in by Helen's passionate determination while Helen was smitten with his innocence and altruism. They stared lovingly into each others eyes. Their faces moved closer together until, finally, they kissed.

"I love you, Helen."

"I love you too, Jake."

Helen helped Jake up on his feet and gives him his crutches. In a seductive tone, she said "Let's go to my tent."

Jake looks excited.

**Morgendorffer house, 2006...**

Jake was telling Jim and Quinn the story.

"We went to her tent and...well...you see..."

Smirking, Jim said "You made love, not war."

Quinn scrunched her nose in disgust. "Ewww. I did NOT need to know that part."

"Sorry, couldn't resist" said Jim.

Rolling her eyes, Helen said "Jake, was it really necessary to tell them that part."

Jake said "But it was a key moment in our relationship. That night you made a man out of me."

Trying not to totally lose it, Quinn said "TMI, Dad. TMI!"

Embarrassed, Jake said "Sorry." Regaining his composure he continued the story. "Anyway, after that night we all got together to take a road trip."

* * *

 **An open road, Summer 1969...**  
 **Music:** "California Dreams" by The Mamas and The Papas

A large van that looked similar to The Tank was heading west on the highway. Inside, Willow was driving while Helen rode shotgun. Jake, Coyote, Sunflower, Tempest, Red Wolf and Cosmo were in the back.

We decided to head out to California, where the whole movement started.

Tempest was meditating.

"Ohm. OOhhhmmm. Ohhmmm."

Cosmo was getting high and muttering nonsense.

"...th' tim's 'r' a' ch'ngin'..."

Deciding to take a trip himself, Red Wolf popped a pill.

Seeing this, Jake asked "Is that LSD?"

"Acid, yep" said Red Wolf, "Me and Cosmo are takin' a trip."

Jake looked at Cosmo, who was clearly in another zone.

"Cosmo looks so peaceful. It must be a cool trip."

"Wanna try it, man?" asked Coyote.

"Sure!"

Red Wolf took a bag of pills out of his jacket.

"How much you want, man?"

"Two hits" said Jake.

All eyes went wide.

Sunflower said "You sure? That's some heavy stuff man. Only Cosmo and Red Wolf ever take that much, the rest of us can't handle it."

Jake was not the least bit deterred.

"You only live once."

Red Wolf shrugged and gave Jake two LSD tablets. He took them both in one gulp.

Jake soon found himself floating on air surrounded by all kinds of colors. His expression was a mix of amazement and euphoria.

"Whoa!"

Just then, a giant man appeared. This man looked like 90's Jake with a beard. His expression was pure malice: it's Mad Dog.

"GAH!!!!"

"Well, well, boy," Mad Dog growled in a booming, demonic voice, "So, you're a communist junkie. Some son you are, I should beat the piss out of you!"

Mad Dog raised his right hand. He's holding a belt and was trying to swat Jake with it.

WHAP!

WHAP!

WAHP!

Jake tried to swim away.

WHAP!

WHAP!!!!

As the giant, demonic version of Mad Dog Morgendorffer chased after Jake he laughed maniacally.

"HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA! YOU GODDAMN, COMMIE, ANTI-AMERICAN WASTE OF MAN JUICE!!! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU, YOU HIPPIE FAGGOT! HA HA HA HA!!!!!"

Desperate to get away, Jake pleaded for mercy.

"NO, PLEASE!! DON'T HURT ME!!!"

Grinning with psychotic fervor, Mad Dog yelled "I'LL KILL YOU, YOU GUTLESS WASTE OF SPERM! I WILL KILL YOU!!!!!"

**Meanwhile, in the van...**

Jake was squirming in sheer terror while Coyote, Sunflower, Tempest and Red Dog look on with concern.

"DAD, DON'T KILL ME!!! ARRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!"

This got Helen's attention. She turned to see what all the commotion was about.

"What's going on back there?"

Panicked, Coyote said "Jake's having a bad trip, man!"

Helen's eyes went wide.

"JAKE!!"

She leapt out of her seat and rushed back there. At this point Jake was cowering in a corner.

"How much did you give him, Red Wolf?" Helen asked.

"Two hits."

Shocked, Helen said "Are you kidding me!?! Only you and Cosmo can handle that much!"

Red Wolf explained "That's what I told him, but he insisted on two."

"What are we gonna do?" asked a panicked Sunflower.

Tempest, who'd ceased her meditation when the commotion started, said "We gotta bring him back to a peaceful place."

Helen leaned in close and cradled Jake.

"Jake, honey, follow my voice. What you see isn't real. I'm here. I'll help you through this."

Jake started to calm down.

"That's it, Jake" said Helen, "Just listen to the sound of my voice. I'm here, I won't let anyone hurt you."

Jake started to suck his own thumb.

Helen (from 2006): _I just kept talking to him until the stuff wore off._

* * *

**Act III**   
**Morgendorffer House, 2006...**

Jake and Helen were still telling the story to Quinn and Jim.

"So, did you guys make it to California?" asked Jim.

"No," said Jake, "We got as far as Colorado, then things went downhill."

**Boulder, CO, August 1969, evening...**

On a lonely street the van puttered to a stop and died. After this Helen, Jake, Willow, Coyote, Tempest, Red Wolf, Sunflower and Cosmo all filed out.

"Dammit!" said Jake, "The engine's dead."

That was when a police car approached and came to a stop. Sunflower was the first to notice.

"Shit! The fuzz!"

Helen said "Everyone be cool!"

A cop stepped out of the car and approached the group. He was a tall and imposing man with brown hair and a square jaw.

"What are you punks up to?"

Red Wolf said "We didn't do anything, man! Why you hassling us?"

The cop got right in Red Wolf's face.

"I'm asking the questions, burn boy, now shut up!"

Jake tried to defuse the tension.

"Hey, man, be cool. We don't want any trouble."

The cop turned his ire on Jake.

"Well, you got trouble, you unpatriotic faggot. Draft cards...NOW!"

Coyote said "We burned 'em at a rally."

Enraged to hear this, the cop said "My brother is in Vietnam right now, risking his life for your freedom! Damn communist peaceniks, I ought to arrest you for treason!"

Cosmo, whacked out as usual, muttered "Alls we'r' sayin' 's giv' peace a chance."

That angered the cop so much that he took his nightstick and smacked Cosmo upside the head with it. Cosmo falls unconscious and hits the ground with a loud thud. This enrages Jake, who immediately gets in the cops face.

"Hey, that's assault!"

"Shut up, commie!" the cop barked, "Or I'll run all your hippie, peacenik asses in." At the point, the cop sees that Jake has a cast and is in crutches. "You break your foot to get out of serving this great country, draft dodger!? PUSSYS LIKE YOU MAKE ME SICK!!! I WISH YOU'D GO THE HELL BACK TO RUSSIA, YOU FUCKING COMMIE SUBVERSIVES!!"

Angry because the cop reminds him of his father, Jake barked "Why?! Because I'm not a baby killer like your brother!"

The cop hit Jake upside the head with the nightstick, knocking him unconscious.

"JAKE!!" Helen shouted.

Enraged, she got right up in the cops face and punched him so hard that it sent a tooth flying out of his mouth. He falls to the ground, unconscious.

Having seen this, the cop's partner exits the patrol car with his gun drawn.

"FREEZE! HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEADS, PUNKS! YOU'RE ALL UNDER ARREST!"

* * *

 **The police station, morning...**  
 **Music:** "Along The Watchtower" by Jimi Hendrix

Jake, Coyote, Red Wolf and Cosmo were in a jail cell. Jake rubs his head.

"Ow! My head."

Red Wolf said "The man's coming down hard on us, man."

Cosmo muttered "it ain' me. it ain' me. I ain' no rich mans son."

Coyote said "That was pretty cool the way Helen punched out that pig, man. I hope the girls are holding up okay."

**In another part of the jail at that same moment...**

Helen was still fuming over what happened the previous night. Willow sat next to her while Tempest meditates and Sunflower paces nervously.

"The nerve of that facist pig!" Helen fumed, "I can't wait 'til I'm a lawyer and can give johnny law a taste of his own medicine."

Sunflower said "Get real, Helen. They got us and they won't let us live that long. The man wants to kill us all! They're gonna hand us over to the CIA and then we'll be in hell. They'll use us as gunea pigs for mind control experiments. When that's done they'll kill us and make it look like we never existed!"

Tempest stopped meditating and looked irritated.

"Dammit, Sunflower, you broke my concentration again! I'll never attain nirvana at this rate!"

Willow decided to break the tension.

"Everyone, I just thought of something. If we get out of this we should set an example. I've been talking this over with Coyote and we want to start a commune after graduation. A self-contained community where we can live together in harmony. Live free and in harmony with the earth, like nature intended."

Helen looked thoughtful while Tempest and Sunflower looked inspired.

"Willow, that's a great idea," said Helen, "and I've got one of my own. GUARD!!!"

A guard approached the cell.

"What do you want?"

**The guys cell, a short time later...**

A cop suddenly unlocked the door.

"One of the girls promised to let us keep all of your money if we drop the charges, so you're free to go."

The guys all breathed a sigh of relief.

**Outside...**

Helen sees Jake and runs up to him.

"Thank God you're alright!"

She hugged him.

_That's how we got out of it. We had no choice but to turn around and go home after that._

* * *

**Middleton College, 1972...**

It's graduation. The ceremony was being held on the quad. All the hippies had degrees.

_We both graduated in 1972. I got my degree in marketing and Helen's was in pre-law. The world was open to us._

What follows is a montage of Helen, Jake, Willow, Coyote, Tempest, Red Wolf, Sunflower and Cosmo traveling west in a van.

 **Music:** "Horse With No Name" by America

First, we see the van going west on a highway.

_On the first part of the journey_

They're camping in the woods.

_I was looking at all the life_

Shot of them all admiring nature.

_There were plants and birds and rocks and things_

Now we see the van crossing the Great Plains.

_There was sand and hills and rings_

Now, they're all at a gas station filling the van. A fly is annoying Jake.

_The first thing I met was a fly with a buzz_

Helen calms Jake by directing his attention to a cloudless sky.

_And the sky with no clouds_

Thery're continuing west as the land becomes more sparse.

_The heat was hot and the ground was dry_   
_But the air was full of sound_

Grassland gives way to desert as they continue west.

_I've been through the desert on a horse with no name_   
_It felt good to be out of the rain_   
_In the desert you can remember your name_   
_'Cause there ain't no one to give you no pain_

We now see the van overheat next to some cacti in the southwest. They pull over.

_After two days in the desert sun_   
_My skin began to turn red_

They manage to get the van started and are on their way. Cut to a shot of Cosmo and Jake staring at a dried out river.

_After three days in the desert sun_   
_I was looking at a river bed_

The others join them and look entranced as they stare at the river bed.

_And the story it told of a river that flowed_   
_Made me sad to think it was dead._

Cut to them camping in the desert.

_I've been through the desert on a horse with no name_   
_It felt good to be out of the rain_

Jake and Helen stare in wonder at all the stars in the desert sky.

_In the desert you can remember your name_   
_'Cause there ain't no one to give you no pain_

Now the desert is giving way to mountains and forest.

_La la, laaaa, la la la la_   
_La la la, laaaaa la_

Shot of the van traveling along the Pacific coast.

_After nine days I let the horse run free_   
_'Cause the desert had turned to sea_

Shot of them camping on the beach.

_There were plants and birds and rocks and things_   
_There was sand and hills and rings_

Jake and Helen are staring out onto the ocean.

_The ocean is a desert with it's life underground_   
_And a perfect disguise above_

Shot of them panhandling on the streets of San Francisco.

_Under the cities lies a heart made of ground_   
_But the humans will give no love_

Shot of them starting the commune in Northern California.

_I've been through the desert on a horse with no name_   
_It felt good to get out of the rain_

Shot of the girls doing all the work while the guys just sit around getting high.

 _In the desert you can remember your name_  
 _'Cause there ain't no one to give you no pain_.(1)

Helen looks increasingly frustrated that none of the guys will lift a finger.

* * *

**Northern California, 1973...**

_We all moved to a commune in Northern California after we graduated. Jake and I stayed for a year before we decided to move on._

A small car was packed with Jake and Helen's belongings. They're saying their goodbyes to the rest of the group.

"I really wish you'd stay, Helen," said Willow, "We've made a whole new world here. Why do you want to go back to all of the madness?"

Helen explained "That's the point, Willow. We've made a better world here, but we need to change the one out there."

"Careful, you guys," Coyote warned, "Those corporate running dogs can get their claws into you real quick."

Jake said "Don't worry, man. We know how to stay true to our values."

Sunflower was skeptical.

"You guys are making a huge mistake. You won't change the system, it'll change you!"

(A/N: Prophetic, isn't it?)

"Now, Sunflower," said Tempest, "They need to find their own path." Turning to Jake and Helen, she added "I wish all the best to you guys."

"Thanks, Tempest," said Helen, "We'll keep in touch."

Willow and Helen then hugged.

"We'll never forget you guys" said Helen.

"Farewell" said Willow as she wiped a stray tear.

* * *

 **The road, a short time later...**  
 **Music:** "As The World Turns"

Jake was driving while Helen rode shotgun.

"I'm never kneading bread again" said Helen.

Jake asked "So, what do we do now?"

Helen said "We get jobs. We'll need them now that we've got our own place. We save up so that I can go to law school. It'll be hard, but we can do it."

Jake liked the sound of that.

"Yeah! Then we can really take on the world!"

Helen was visibly touched by Jake's enthusiasm.

"Oh, Jakey! I love you so much."

"I love you too, Helen."

* * *

**Morgendorffer House, 2006...**

Jake was finishing the story as Quinn and Jim listened intently.

"Two years later, we got married. Tempest, who by then had left the commune and become a licensed notary, performed the ceremony."

Helen added "The fall after our wedding I started law school."

"That's a great story" said Jim.

"Thanks" replied Jake.

Quinn asked "So when did you abandon the whole hippie thing?"

Helen explained "It was a gradual transition."

Jake added "You know, a compromise here, a Republican vote there. Before we knew it, we'd turned into the very thing we used to rebel against."

Elaborating, Helen said "It started when we left the commune in '73, it was complete when we both voted for Reagan in '84."

* * *

**Quinn's (and now also Jim's) apartment, evening....**

Quinn and Jim sat on the sofa talking about the story they'd been told.

"That was some story your parents told tonight" said Jim.

Quinn said "I know. They've been through so much over the years and stayed by each others side all that time. Frankly, they have in each other what I've always wanted, a soulmate who'll stick by me and me by him, no matter what." Smiling, Quinn added "Actually, I've already found that. You turned your back on your career for me."

Jim said "I can't believe you almost did the same thing."

Quinn said "Jim, I'd do it again if I had to."

"So would I," said Jim, "I love you, Quinn."

 **Music:** "As The World Turns"

Quinn said "I love you too, Jim."

With that, they kissed.

_As the world turns, turn, turn, turn_

**End Episode.**  
1) "Horse With No Name" by America, copyright 1972 Warner Bros. Records.


	2. Quinn's Skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane wants Quinn to pose for a painting but there's a catch: Quinn has to pose nude.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Quinn's Skin"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, morning...**

Quinn and Jim were having breakfast. Quinn was eating Model Crunch while Jim is having eggs and bacon.

"How can you eat that junk and not gain weight?" asked Quinn.

Jim explained "It's easy when you spend an hour a day in the gym."

Quinn was still surprised...and a little envious of the fact that weight control is easier for guys.

"But I do power yoga and cardio and still have to watch my weight."

"It's simple math," Jim explained, "You work off the calories you take in. It's when you don't do that that you gain weight."

Quinn smiled.

"That is such a brain answer."

Jim smiled back.

"Not like you expected any different."

"True," Quinn admitted, "So, what are you gonna do today?"

Jim said "I have two job interviews today. One in the morning and one in the afternoon. Hopefully, I'll soon have a paycheck again."

For those (hopefully few) who don't know, Jim had to quit his job in order to stay with Quinn. He originally took a promotion that forced him to move to Japan but missed Quinn so much that he quit and hopped on the first plane back. The good news is this means they're still together. The bad news is that Jim was unemployed as a result.

"You can do it, Jim," said Quinn, "I believe in you."

Jim smiled.

"Thanks, babe."

Quinn looked at her watch.

"I've gotta go. I'll see you this evening."

She walked up to Jim and kissed him on the forehead.

"Bye, honey."

Jim said "Have a nice day, sweetheart."

* * *

**Daria and Jane's apartment in Boston, day...**

Daria was sitting on the couch reading a book while Jane is painting on a canvas. Jane's current piece was a psychedelic patchwork of stars blending into a rural landscape. She was working on it for an upcoming gala that displays the work of local talent. She'd participated in it every year since she was a freshman at BFAC. Jane stopped painting, looked at the canvas and groaned in frustration. This got Daria's attention, causing her to look up at Jane.

"Something wrong?"

Jane said "I need to come up with something for the upcoming gala at the Art Museum but everything I paint is just a variation on something I've already done."

"And how is that a problem?" asked Daria.

Jane explained "I want to wow the critics this year, but that won't happen if I display something that they've already seen me do. I need to become more diverse. Start showing some range instead of being a one trick pony."

At this point Jane got an idea.

"Hey, Daria, remember that time I asked you to pose nude for one of my paintings?"

"Yes, and my answer is still no."

This did not surprise Jane one bit. Over the years she'd asked Daria to pose nude for one of her paintings on several occasions and the answer had always been no. In fact, she wouldn't have even asked this time had she not been desperate for something different.

"Now, Daria, the human body is nothing to be ashamed of."

Without missing a beat, Daria said "And this human body is for the eyes of lovers and doctors only."

Jane resorted to begging.

"Come on, I can't afford to pay someone. Who else would do me a favor for free?"

"Someone with great sex appeal and a massive ego" Daria suggested.

Jane grins. She just thought of the perfect candidate.

* * *

 **Meanwhile, at an office in Lawndale...**  
 **Music:** "Bitches and Money" by Buckcherry  
 _Life ain't nuthin' but bitches and money_  
 _BITCHES AND MONEY_

Jim was seated in front of the hiring manager, a balding man in his sixties.

"So, Mr. Carbone" the HR man said, "What are you willing to add to this company?"

Jim said "Well, I am an intelligent and consumer friendly individual who has two years of experience in the financial sector. In that time I've developed a knack for helping people make wise financial decisions."

The manager looked at Jim's resume.

"It says here that you went to Bromwell University. How did you pay for it? It is one of the most expensive schools in the country."

"Full academic scholarship" Jim explained.

The HR man then said "And since then your only employer has been the brokerage firm Grace, Sloan and Page?"

"That's correct."

The manager looks grim. "I have to be honest, Mr. Carbone," he said, "While your education is perfect we'd prefer someone with more experience. If you had stayed at Grace, Sloan and Page longer you'd be a shoo-in. I'm afraid, however, that you were only there two years. From what I understand, you quit shortly after recieving a promotion. Why was that?"

Jim opted for honesty (big mistake).

"It caused me to move to Japan and break up with my girlfriend. I was so miserable that I quit and came back to the States...and got back with my girlfriend."

The HR man said "That's not good. What we value here is loyalty to the company. A man who leaves a job for a loved one can hardly be called loyal."

Jim was a little peeved by this.

"Actually, that shows loyalty to said loved one."

The HR man said "We'd prefer an employee who puts the company first."

Now, Jim's pissed.

"I thought this was an investment bank, not the Mafia."

The manager's unimpressed.

* * *

**Meanwhile, at Pizza King...**

Quinn and Nicole were having lunch and talking.

Nicole asked "So, how goes Jim's job hunt?"

"He has two interviews today. Hopefully, he get's one of the jobs."

"I don't get it," said Nicole, "Why's he having such a hard time finding a new job?"

Quinn sighed.

"Nicole, promise you won't say anything."

"Relax, Quinn," Nicole reassured, "I'm getting better at keeping my mouth shut."

Quinn said "I think the Sloanes blacklisted him."

"Why?" asked Nicole.

Quinn said "Because he quit working for their company."

Nicole rolled her eyes.

"Come on, Quinn, who does that?"

"It's just a feeling I have," Quinn said, "After all, with Jim's qualifications he should've gotten a job by now. It's not like we're in a recession."

 **Author's note:** This story happened in 2006, before the financial meltdown.

Nicole said "Quinn, the only reason I got a job so fast when I moved down here was because we called in a favor from Stacy and Chuck needed an assistant. Prior to that the fastest I got a job was four weeks and that was in the late 90's, when the economy was creating 300,000 new jobs a month like it was nothing."

Quinn looked thoughtful.

"Come to think of it, maybe I shouldn't be surprised after all." Quinn sighed after this.

"What's wrong?" asked Nicole.

Quinn said "It's my fault Jim's unemployed in the first place."

Nicole gave Quinn a reassuring look.

"Quinn, if the shoe was on the other foot would you blame Jim?"

"No," said Quinn, "But still, I'm the reason he left his old job."

"Relax, Quinn," said Nicole, "So he's having trouble landing a new job. It's no big deal. You make more than enough to cover the bills so Jim can afford to take his time."

Quinn smiled. After all, it's not like she and Jim are in any financial hardship.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having dinner and talking about their days.

"So, how'd the interviews go?" asked Quinn.

Jim said "The morning interview wasn't too bad. They said they'd let me know in a few days. The afternoon one went south quickly. First, they were uncomfortable with my only having two years experience. Then, they asked why I left Grace, Sloan and Paige. I told them and was accused of being disloyal."

Quinn had a guilty look on her face.

"Jim, I'm sorry."

"What for?" asked Jim, "You didn't do anything."

Quinn said "I still feel like it's my fault. What if you were blacklisted because of me?"

Jim said "I don't think Tom's that vindictive. If it turns out he is and I was blacklisted, however, I have a trump card: girlfriend whose mother is a lawyer. I doubt I was blacklisted, though. I think I'm just unlucky."

Quinn now tried to be cheerful.

"Don't worry, Jim. Tomorrow's another day."

Now it was Jim's turn to feel bad.

"It's just so frustrating. I remember how back before the dot com bubble burst the job market was so good all you had to do to get a job was walk in and ask for one. Now, they want only perfect people."

Quinn was sympathetic.

"I wish my own experience could relate, but it doesn't. I've never had to worry about finding a job. I guess I'm just lucky like that."

The phone rang.

"I'll get it" said Quinn.

She got up and answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Quinn, it's Jane."

Quinn smiled.

"Jane! How are you?"

"I'm alright," said Jane before getting right to the point, "Listen, do you still have any desire to model?"

"Not professionally," said Quinn, "Why?"

Explaining, Jane said "I need to do a painting for an upcoming art gala. I wanna do a life portrait. The problem is that Daria won't pose for it and I can't afford to pay someone. How would you like me to capture your beauty on a canvas?"

Quinn's eyes went wide.

"You want me to model for one of your paintings!?"

"Yep."

Quinn said "Of course I'll do it."

"Great," said Jane, "Can you come up to Boston this weekend?"

"I'll be there," said Quinn. Excitedly, she added "This is great. I get to model!"

"There's just one more thing," said Jane, "You'd have to pose nude."

Quinn's jaw dropped.

* * *

**Act II**   
**Quinn's apartment , evening...**

Quinn was on the phone and looks very uncomfortable.

"I need to think about it."

On the other end of the line Jane began to fear Quinn might not be willing to pose. "So, you'll do it?"

"Maybe," said Quinn, "Let me think about it. I'll give you my answer tomorrow."

"Okay" said Jane.

They hang up.

"What was that about?" asked Jim.

Turning to her live-in boyfriend, Quinn said "Jane wants me to go up to Boston this weekend and pose for one of her paintings."

"That's great." Seeing the unsure expression on Quinn's face, Jim asked "Why so apprehensive?"

"She wants me to pose nude."

Jim was totally unfazed by this.

"How is that a problem? After all, you have a great body."

Quinn said "She wants to display the painting at an art gala. People are going to see me naked."

"So?" asked Jim, "I've seen you naked and you look incredible."

"This is different," said Quinn, "Complete strangers will know what I look like without clothes on."

Jim said "Quinn, your bikinis leave very little to the imagination. They only hide your pubic grooming style and the look of your nipples. Your body shape is on full display."

"Jim, you know how I am about overtly sexual stuff."

Jim rolled his eyes. "It's just a painting of you without clothes on. It's not like she's asking you to do a porno," after a brief pause, he added "She isn't, right?"

"No," said Quinn, "I wouldn't be doing anything raunchy. I'd just be naked."

"It's your decision, but I fail to see a problem. Whatever you decide you have my full support."

Quinn was still apprehnensive.

"It doesn't make you jealous, then? The idea that strangers will see me naked?"

Jim said "What they'll see is an image of what you look like naked, not the actual thing. But, if you're uncomfortable you don't have to."

Quinn said "Actually, I want to. I'm just not sure if I can."

Jim said "Well, you know my position on this but if you still can't decide then maybe get a third opinion."

Quinn looked thoughtful.

* * *

**Nicole's apartment, later...**

Quinn, accompanied by Jim, knocked on the door. Nicole opened it partially but didn't unlatch it (it's evening and if you've been following my stories you know what that means).

"Hey, Quinn."

"Nicole, can we come in?"

Seeing that Jim's there, Nicole said "Just a minute."

She closed the door. A moment later the door opened again to reveal Nicole now wearing a bathrobe.

"Come on in."

Jim couldn't help commenting.

"We interrupted nude anime time, didn't we?"

Nicole nodded while Quinn tried not to laugh.

**Later...**

Quinn, Jim and Nicole were sitting on the couch. Quinn was explaining the reason for the unannounced visit.

"...so I figured we'd talk to someone who's unusually comfortable with nudity."

"I see," said Nicole, "You know, lounging around your own place in your birthday suit and posing for a painting are two totally different things."

Quinn said "So you don't think I should do it?"

"I didn't say that," Nicole replied, "I'm just saying I wouldn't do it. Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you doing it. In fact, I actually envy people with the courage to do that."

"Says the weekend nudist" Jim playfully replied. When both Nicole and Quinn stared daggers for that one he added "Just saying." After a moment, Jim said "Seriously, though, I don't think there's anything wrong with posing nude for a painting."

Nicole said "I agree. Quinn, it's your decision, but I really don't think this is that big a deal. After all, it's not like you're doing porn."

Quinn thought it over for a second.

"So, you're both saying I should do this?"

"Actually," said Nicole, "It's your decision. Your boyfriend and I aren't trying to pressure you one way or another. We're both just saying that there's nothing wrong with it."

Quinn said "I know, I'm just still a little uncomfortable with the idea."

"If it helps," said Jim, "I'll come along for support."

"And to get a free show" Nicole joked.

Quinn said "Very funny you guys."

"Yeah," said Jim, "Why go to Boston to see something I see regularly anyway?"

Getting back on subject, Quinn said "So if I do this you're both saying it's not a problem?"

After both her boyfriend and best friend nodded in the affirmative Quinn got out her cell phone and dialed a number.

"Jane, I'm in."

* * *

**Daria and Jane's apartment in Boston, Saturday...**

Jane has set up her studio in the living room. There's a red recliner and in front of that an easel with a blank canvas. Jane was waiting for Quinn to arrive. Suddenly, there's a knock on the door.

"Come in."

Quinn and Jim enter.

"You know, Jim," Jane remarked, "You didn't have to come along and brave an eight hour drive up I-95. Since you two are a live-in couple now I can assume you already see her naked on a regular basis."

Jim shrugged.

"True, but she still has some misgivings about this. Also, I'm enough of a masochist to enjoy an eight hour drive."

Added Quinn "I know it's inconvenient but I just feel more comfortable with him around."

"I understand," said Jane, "Anyway, there's a bathrobe in my room that you can change into. Daria will be busy with work and grad school until this evening so we have all day to do this."

"Wouldn't it be easier if I just strip now and we get started?" Asked Quinn.

After a friendly chuckle, Jane said "You've much to learn, young padawan. This isn't like posing for Playboy. There's no flash photography involved. This will likely take all day and you'll need to take breaks. I seriously doubt you want to spend all of that time completely naked. This is also why most nudes show the model in a reclining position."

Quinn nodded in understanding.

**A few minutes later...**

Quinn emerged from Jane's room in a bathrobe. She handed her clothes to Jim.

"Would you mind putting these someplace where they won't get dirty?"

"Not at all" said Jim. He then took Quinn's clothes and laid them out neatly over the back of the couch, which had been moved to a far corner of the room.

Turning to the robe clad Quinn, Jane said "Okay, here's what I need you to do."

Jane walked over to the recliner and sprawled out on it. She folded her arms and placed her hands behind her head while raising her left leg in a triangular position while the other leg remains prone.

"Just lay on this recliner and hold this pose as long as you can. Let me know when you need to take a break."

"Okay." At this point, Quinn's misgivings resurfaced as she realized that the pose would provide a full frontal view. "Um, Jane, that's going to show a lot."

Jane got up off of the recliner.

"Don't worry. I don't expect you to touch yourself or anything like that. If I'd wanted to do something pornographic I would've asked Daria to stick around so I could really push the envelope."

While Jim tried not to laugh Quinn scrunched her nose in disgust.

"Ewwwww!"

Smirking, Jane said "Sorry, couldn't resist. " With that, she walked over to the easel. "Ready to make some art?"

"Yes."

Quinn proceeded to untie the robe. She handed it to Jim and stood there completely naked.

Seeing Quinn in all her naked glory caused Jane to comment "No wonder every guy who meets you is an instant slave to your every whim."

Smiling from the compliment Quinn made her way to the recliner and assumed the pose. Jim watched with rapt attention. Even after a year and some change he still finds Quinn's body enticing.

* * *

 **Montage of the next several hours...**  
 **Music:** "Beautiful" by James Blunt

First, we see Jane working on her painting. Next, a shot of Quinn from over Jane's shoulder, Jane's head blocking the view of Quinn's brests while the edge of the easel blocks the view of her lower torso. Next, a shot of Jim liking what he sees. When he smiles we cut to a close up of Quinn's face, smiling back. This is followed by a shot of them chatting while taking a break, Quinn wearing the bathrobe. Next, a shot of Jane painting away. This is followed by another shot of Quinn's face. Cut to another break. This time Quinn remains naked but the angle of the shot prevents us from seeing anything inappropiate. Final shot is of Jane making the final touches on her masterpiece.

"And...viola!" said Jane, "I have now captured Quinn in all of her naked glory."

Cut to the bathrobe on the floor. We see Quinn's hand (and only her hand, you horny pervs) pick up the bathrobe. Cut to her tying the robe shut.

"Can I see it?" asked Quinn.

"Of course" said Jane, who was proud of her latest work. She showed them the painting.

"Jane, it's beautiful!" said Quinn.

Jim said "That's because you're beautiful. This actually allows the rest of the world to see what I see when I look at you, a stunning goddess among women."

Quinn blushed at her boyfriend's compliment.

* * *

**Morgendorffer house, Sunday evening...**

Quinn and Jim had stayed in Boston overnight and spent the evening hanging out with Daria, Jane and Trent before driving back to Lawndale the next day. Now they were having Sunday Dinner with Jake and Helen. They are having microwave lasagna for dinner (no way Quinn or Helen will allow Jim to be subjected to one of Jake's culinary experiments).

"So, Jim, any luck finding a job?" Helen asked in a somewhat accusatory tone.

Jim explained "Despite the low unemployment rate, no. Some rejected me because they feel I don't fit in with the company culture, but that's only a handful. Most of the time it's either that I'm over qualified because of my Ivy League education or I don't have enough experience."

Jake asked "How could two years at Grace, Sloan and Page not count as enough experience?"

Jim replied "When they say "Experience Required" they mean at least a decade. At least it seems like that."

"Well" said Helen, "How did you get the last job you had?"

"Nepotism," Jim explained, "Tom and I met as roommates at Bromwell and we hit it off. He hooked me up with a job at his father's company after graduation."

Jake, knowing that Tom and Daria have maintained some level of contact over the years, said "How is it you never met Daria until after you started dating Quinn?"

Jim explained "Tom mentioned her over the years but nearly all of their contact was over the phone so I didn't really make the connection until Quinn introduced us."

Quinn, seeing that her parents are grilling Jim, decided to change the subject.

"Did I mention that we spent yesterday at Daria and Jane's place in Boston?"

"That's great, sweetie!" said Jake, "How is your sister?"

"She's good" said Quinn.

Helen asked "Why did you two head up to Boston anyway?"

Without thinking, Quinn said "I was there because Jane wanted to do a portrait of me."

"Wonderful!" said Helen, "Why?"

Jim said "The Art museum has an expo coming up where local artists put their work on display and admission is free."

This got him an elbow from Quinn as she realizes she's just said too much, but Jake and Helen don't notice.

"That's great!" said an excited Jake. Turning to his wife, he added "We should go, Helen."

Quinn turned pale.

Not noticing either Quinn or Jim's growing discomfort, Helen said "Of course. You girls may be grown now but we can still be supportive parents."

"I don't think that's such a good idea" Jim said nervously.

Helen brushed him off. "Nonsense, it's a great idea."

"No, Jim's right," said a panicked Quinn, "It would be a bad idea for you guys to come!"

"Why?" asked Jake.

Quinn was sweating bullets at this point.

"Well...um...you see...This painting is...well...a nude portrait."

Helen's eyes went wide.

"WHAT!?!"

Jake had a similar reaction.

"GAH!!!!!"

* * *

**Act III**   
**Morgendorffer house, evening...**

Quinn was having a heated argument with Jake and Helen while an uncomfortable looking Jim looks on and doesn't dare get involved.

"Quinn Louise Morgendorffer!" Helen barked, "How could you do something like this!?"

Jake was seriously freaking out.

"Oh, God! Horny perverts are gonna be staring at my little girl! I'll kill 'em. I'LL KILL 'EM!!!!!"

Helen immediately sprang into action.

"JAKE, CALM DOWN! You're going to give yourself another heart attack."

Jake calmed down.

Turning her attention back to Quinn, Helen ranted "As for you, young lady, I can't believe you would do something like this! It reinforces the old notion that women should be valued only for their looks!"

Rolling her eyes, Quinn said "Mom, it's just a painting of me without close on. I admit it seems awkward at first, but when you look at it from a strictly logical point of view it's not really a big deal. Would you object to me posing for a portrait of me laying on a recliner in my current outfit?"

"Don't be rediculous, sweetie," said Helen, "Of course I wouldn't object to that."

Quinn asked "Then why do you object to this? It's the same thing. The only difference is that I didn't have any clothes on."

Helen was NOT going to lose this one.

"There's a huge difference! It plays in to the notion of women as sex objects."

Jim said "I was there, it wasn't like that. It was actually very tastefully and professionally done."

Jake stood up and went totally ballistic.

"YOU STARED AT MY LITTLE GIRL WHILE SHE WAS NAKED!!!! YOU PERVERT! I'LL KILL YOU!!! I'LL CASTRATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!"

Jake was about to lunge at Jim but Helen held out her arm and stopped him.

"SIT DOWN, JAKE!"

Jake sits down. Quinn and Jim exchange worried looks.

Helen said "Jake, you're being ridiculous. Quinn and Jim are a twenty-something live in couple. Remember what we were like at that age?"

Jake's eyes went wide.

"GAH!!!! OH, DEAR GOD, NO!!!"

At this point, Quinn decided she'd had enough and got up to leave.

"Come on, Jim!"

"We're finishing this discussion, young lady!" Helen commanded.

Channeling her own inner Helen, Quinn said "Yes, we will, when you and Dad are ready to be adults about this. I'm not a little girl or an ignorant ditz. I'm twenty-three years old, it's my body and my decision. I'm sorry that it upset you, but it was my decision to pose nude."

With that, she and Jim left.

* * *

 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, later that night...**  
 **Music:** "Stupid Girls" by Pink

Quinn was on the phone telling Daria about the little blowout with their parents.

"...so now Dad wants to kill Jim and Mom's ready for all out war."

Daria said "And that's why I'd never tell them something like this. Did you relapse into your airhead phase?"

"I wasn't going to tell them," Quinn explained, "I mentioned that I posed for a painting and they pressed for details. They were insisting on going to the expo where this will be displayed and I had to tell them why it wasn't a good idea"

"I remember those days," Daria replied, "Morgendorffer dinner conversations, like the Spanish Inquisition but more painful. Did Dad have another heart attack?"

Quinn said "Thankfully, no. What I really don't get is Mom's objection. She said I was playing into the idea of women as sex objects. What's with that?"

"Tell me, Quinn, are you familiar with second wave feminism?" asked Daria.

"No."

Daria explained "The womens movement has come in waves. The first wave was in the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries. The crowning success of this wave was the Nineteenth Amendment, which gave women the right to vote. The second wave emerged in the 1960's. This wave fought against things like wage discrimination and sexual harassment in the workplace while championing reproductive rights. In the 1980's this wave fragmented as many feminists joined the New Right in it's war on pornography, which the feminists saw as another form of male chauvanism. Many peoples definition of pornography, unfortunately, tends to be so broad as to classify any depiction of nudity as pornographic whether it depicts sex or not. Mom was a part of this second wave and as she grew older and more conservative her views on nudity have shifted accordingly."

Quinn thought this over for a second.

"So, she thinks that by posing nude I'm sending the message that women are sex objects. We all have bodies under our clothes. It's not like I'm inviting everyone who sees the painting to have sex with me."

"Some people are too irrational to understand the difference," said Daria, "That's what Mom wants to protect you from. You know that in the eyes of a parent you never seem to age past five years old."

Quinn rolled her eyes.

"Tell me about it."

* * *

**Office of Morgendorffer and Daughter Consulting, the next day...**

Jake was in his office when there's a knock on the door.

"Come in."

Quinn entered the office. This made Jake so nervous that he used the first excuse he could think of to avoid the conversation that he knows is coming.

"Oh, my, I have a meeting with a client in five minutes. I'd better run."

Quinn didn't buy it.

"Dad, I know that's not true. I looked at your schedule before I came in."

Jake looks like a dear caught in the headlights. Quinn sits down in front of his desk.

Very nervous, Jake said "So, um, what did you wanna talk about?"

"About the other night."

Jake said "Um, Yeah, I was hoping we could just pretend that never happened."

Quinn replied "Well, I feel the need to explain a few things. I'm sorry if what I did upset you but it's not like anyone pressured me into anything. The decision was my own."

"I know, sweetie," said Jake with a hint of saddness in his voice, "It's just hard to accept that your child is now fully grown. I guess a part of me wished that you'd stay a little girl forever."

Quinn said "Dad, that never happens. I'm still your daughter but I'm also a grown woman now. I didn't do anything wrong and I was not taken advantage of. The whole thing was done very professionally."

Regaining his composure, Jake said "You really need to talk to your mother about this. She's the one who's out for blood over the...well...you know."

Quinn nodded. She was NOT looking forward to that conversation.

"I know, but in addition to being father and daughter we're also business partners. The sooner things stop being awkward, the better."

"I understand. I was just shocked," After a brief pause, Jake asked "Um, I'm not gonna have to go to this expo, am I?"

Quinn rolled her eyes.

"God, that's too awkward for me."

This relieved Jake to no end.

**Quinn's office, later...**

Quinn was now on the phone.

"Hi, Mom."

On the other end of the line a nervous Helen said "Hello, Quinn."

Quinn got right to the point. "Mom, we need to talk about this nude painting. You reacted as if I'd been in something pornographic."

Fortunately, Helen's had enough time to calm down since the blowup the night before. She patiently explained her position.

"I just felt that you'd done something to make yourself seem like a sex object."

Quinn said "The picture is a tasteful nude that has nothing overtly sexual or erotic about it. Would a picture of me in a bikini be this bad?"

Seeing her daughter's point, Helen sighed.

"You know, I'm still not entirely sure why you did something like this."

"Remember David Sorenson?" Quinn asked.

"The tutor you had that one summer. Of course."

Quinn explained "He once said something to me that's always kind of stuck with me. I wasn't taking it seriously and when I pointed out to him that I'm popular he said, quote: "The only reason you're popular is your looks, and those won't last forever." It was a long overdue wake up call. By doing this I can look back in old age and be reminded of just what a stunner I was in my youth."

Helen, seeing Quinn's point, smiled.

* * *

**Boston Museum Of Fine Arts, evening....**

On the building was a banner that read "Up and Coming Artist Expo 2006."

Inside the museum Quinn, Jim and Daria approached Jane, who was standing by the covered portrait of Quinn.

"Why's it covered?" asked Quinn.

"It's a surprise," Jane answered, "I was waiting for you to get here before unveiling it."

Daria, meanwhile, said "I can't believe I'm doing this."

Jane said "Would you rather have been home when I painted it?" After a chuckle, she added "Trust me, Daria. This idea will appeal to you very much. Now that you're all here I can uncover this thing."

Jane grabbed the sheet covering the painting. They all see the full portrait and gasp as there have been some alterations. Jane had painted on two black squares, one covering Quinn's breasts and the other covering her sex. In each box Jane had written the words "European Version Only".

Grinning, the artist explained "After you left last weekend I decided to make some alterations. Anyone can do a nude, but how many people do one that's also social commentary?"

Even Daria was impressed.

"I have to say, Jane, it's nice to see art that's brutally honest."

Quinn giggled while Jim said "It's funny because it's true."

"Tell me about it" added Quinn.

Daria commented "Thank God for American squeamishness."

They all smile.

"By the way, Quinn," said Jane as she handed Quinn a plastic tube, "A little payment for your contribution."

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, the following evening...**

Quinn and Jim entered the bedroom. Quinn had the poster tube Jane had given her.

"It was nice of Jane to copy the painting before she altered it" said Jim.

Nodding, Quinn said "When I'm all old and crusty I'll be able to look at this and say 'That's me when I was 23'."

Quinn took out the painting and tacked it on the wall. She and Jim then stood and admired the uncensored painting of a completely naked Quinn.

**End Episode.**


	3. Jim The Mechanic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The good news: Jim gets a new job. The bad news: One of his coworkers is Kevin

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme** : "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Jim the Mechanic"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Chuck and Stacy's house, evening...**

Stacy, Chuck, Quinn, Jim and Nicole were seated around the dinning room table playing poker. Stacy adds a chip to the pot.

"I raise. Any takers?"

Chuck said "Well, oh love of my life, if you insist. Call."

Nicole said "Shit! I'm out."

She then folds.

Smirking, Quinn said "Get ready to hand over your chips...Call!"

She adds her chips to the pot.

Jim said nothing, just sitting there with a totally expressionless face.

"In or out, Jim?" asked Stacy.

Not even blinking, Jim calmly said "Well, I must be out of my mind, but...call."

Jim adds his chips to the pot.

Nicole said "Anyone ever tell you how hard to read you are, Jim?"

Jim said "It's poker, Nicole. Being impossible to figure out's the name of the game."

At this point, Stacy showed her cards and grinned triumphantly.

"Sorry to break this to everyonr but...three Jacks!"

"Damn!" said Chuck as he showed his cards, "I only have two pair: Kings and tens."

Quinn now smiled.

"Don't celebrate just yet, Stacy."

She tipped her hand, showing two Kings and three Queens.

"Full House! What have you got, Jim?"

Jim's stony expression suddenly changed to a 'gotcha' grin.

"Read 'em and weep."

He tips his hand. Jim has four aces. For those who don't know, four of a kind is one of two hands that beats a full house (the other one's a straight flush).

"Sonofabitch!" said an exasperated Quinn.

Stacy just sat there in stunned silence.

Nicole, Meanwhile, gasped "That's the fourth hand in a row, Jim!"

"Yeah, man," said Chuck, "What's your secret?"

Jim said "I've been observing everyone's betting pattern. I noticed that Nicole bets big on weak hands to bluff everyone into folding. Stacy, on the other hand, won't raise unless she has at least three of a kind. I knew that was what she had when she raised and since I had four aces I knew it was safe to call. Another thing is I don't bet big on a big hand unless everyone else is so confident that they're betting big on weak hands. A little luck helps, too."

Jim now frowned.

"If only my luck in getting a job was like my luck in cards."

Chuck said "I don't get it. How does someone with your resume strike out so much?"

"Yeah, babe," added Quinn, "Are you sure the Sloanes didn't blacklist you?"

Morose, Jim said "I don't think it would matter if they did. At that job fair I went to yesterday I noticed a lot of people were getting hired based solely on the recommendation of friends. It seems that what you know matters less than who you know?"

Quinn said "Jim, my father and I have plenty of clients who are hiring. Just say the word and we'll be happy to throw some influence your way."

Jim winced a little out of pride. "Honey, I appreciate the offer. But you've already taken me into your home and let me slide on the bills. You've sacrificed enough for me already. I'd take an offer from Chuck but he already gave an assistant job to Nicole."

"Maybe I can help" said Stacy.

"The TV station needs an accountant?" asked Jim.

"No" said Stacy, "but my father needs a mechanic. Two, actually."

Sighing, Jim said "I appreciate the offer, but I don't do nepotism. Sorry, I'm just too proud for that."

* * *

 **A bank in Lawndale, the next day...**  
 **Music:** "Somebody Told Me" by The Killers

Jim was seated along with two other guys who were also looking for a job.

"Looking for a teller job?" asked one of the other applicants.

"Yeah" Jim admitted, "I haven't been able to get work in investment so I'm applying for the open teller position. I was a stock broker before this. You?"

The guy said "One of my old college buddies is the bank manager."

This made Jim nervous. He grew even more nervous when...

"Dude!" said the second guy, "I thought I recognized you!"

The first guy said "Brandon! How are you, man?"

"I'm good, Mike."

Brandon and Mike shook hands while Jim grew increasingly apprehensive. At this point, the bank manager, a guy who looked like a movie star, came out.

"Okay," said the manager, "We only have two open positions, so one of you is going home empty handed." The manager saw Brandon and smiled. "But I know it's not gonna be you! Brandon, long time no see!"

"Hey, Ryan!"

At this point, Ryan saw Mike.

"Mike, I haven't seen you since that grad party at our frat house! How are you man?"

As the three guys started chatting about their college frat boy days Jim quietly left.

_Damn good-old-boy networks!_

* * *

**Pizza King, a few days later...**

Jim arrived at Pizza King to meet with Stacy. By now his pride had eroded enough to give nepotism a try.

"Jim, over here!"

Jim saw Stacy seated at a table with a guy who bore a striking resemblence to her. This guy had the same sprarkling eyes as Stacy and his hair, which was short with frosted tips, was the same shade of brown as hers. Jim made his way to the table.

"Jim," said Stacy, "I'd like you to meet my brother, Adam. Adam, my friend Jim Carbone."

Jim and Adam shook hands.

"Pleasure to meet you, Jim."

"Same here, Mr. Rowe."

"Please, call me Adam."

They sat down.

Stacy said "Adam went to work for Dad in the family business after college, Rowe Automotive."

Adam said "So, you're looking for a new job?"

"Yes," said Jim, "But just to be clear, I'm not a fan of nepotism."

"Neither am I," said Adam, "That's why I wanted to meet you before introducing you to our father. I'm not gonna recommend an idiot for the job."

Stacy explained "I told them you're a car buff, but Adam insisted on meeting you first."

Adam said "Since your formal education is in business, I need to ask what qualities you bring to a mechanic position."

Jim smiled.

"Why don't I show you?"

**Outside, a short time later...**

Jim, Stacy and Adam were at Jim's car. Adam was already impressed.

"Is that what I think it is?"

"Yep," Jim said proudly, "A fully restored 1987 Chevy Camaro IROC-Z. Notice the top."

Adam noted the glass roof.

"Only regular Z/28 came in T-top, not IROC's."

Jim explained "One of many modifications I've made over the years."

He then got in his Camaro and popped the hood.

"Check it out."

Adam noted the headers on the intake and the pushrod.

"Supercharger! Nice!"

Signaling Adam over, Jim said "And that's not all."

Jim popped the rear hatch and showed Adam the nitrous tanks.

"You run NOS?!" said Adam.

Nodding, Jim said "I also reinforced the suspension to handle the extra torque. Listen to this."

Jim started the car. Adam stepped back with a start as the car roared to life.

"Borla Exhausts," Jim explained, "This baby has 400 horsepower due to all of my modifications, and I did it all myself."

Jim shut off the Camaro and closed everything back up.

Impressed, Adam said "I'll get right to the point, Jim. My father is currently looking to fill two mechanic positions in his garage. I can set up an interview with him, if you're interested."

"Thanks, Adam," said Jim, "I really appreciate it. How is it you're working in your father's auto shop?"

Adam said "It's a pretty laid back environment. Based on what you've shown me I can tell you here and now that you're a shoo-in for the mechanic job."

Jim smiled.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment building, evening...**

Quinn was having some coffee while Jim paced nervously. Seeing how worried her boyfriend is Quinn tries to calm him down.

"Jim, why are you so nervous? You said the interview went well."

Jim said "It did, but that doesn't necessarily mean I got the job. If someone more qualified came along since the interview then I'm shit out of luck."

"Don't worry, Jim," Quinn reassured, "I believe in you. You should stop being so hard on yourself."

Jim felt better. Just then, the phone rang. Quinn picked it up as she is closest.

"Hello...Hi, Mr. Rowe...Yes, he's here."

She covered the reciever and turned to Jim.

"It's for you."

She hands Jim the phone.

"Hello, Mr. Rowe..." His expression brightened. "...Really?...Of course...I'll be there...Thanks."

Jim hung up.

"I got the job!"

* * *

**A large building with multiple garages called "Rowe Automotive", the next day...**

Jim and Adam were in the office seated in front of Adam and Stacy's father, John Rowe. John is a fifty-something with a mustache and a light brown mullet that is starting to go gray. He also has a bit of a beer gut.

"Welcome aboard, Jim" said John.

"Thanks again, Mr. Rowe."

Smiling, John said "Please, call me John."

"So, that's one position filled" Adam commented.

"Actually" said John, "I've filled both. I also found someone to fill the other mechanic spot."

"Excellent" said Adam.

Just then, the door opened.

John said "Allow me to introduce our other new mechanic."

"Hey, Jim," said Kevin Thompson, "What's up?"

Jim gasped in horror.

* * *

**Act II**   
**Rowe Automotive, day...**

John Rowe has just hired two new mechanics. One of them is Jim. Unfortunately, the other is Kevin Thompson. Jim is horrified at the prospect of working with him.

"Oh, God!" Jim groaned.

Puzzled, John asked "Do you two know each other?"

"Yes," Jim answered. _Unfortunately._

Kevin asked "So, are we, like, gonna supercharge a car?"

John said "We will if it's what the customer wants. This is a full service shop."

Kevin's eyes went wide with excitement.

"Cool!"

Jim wasn't the only one who was worried. Adam knew Kevin through his sister and was fully aware of how dumb he is.

"Dad, why did you hire Kevin?" John asked, "Do you have any idea how many fires he's started?"

Kevin said "Two electrical, three chemical and one that's a mystery even to me."

Adam said "Dad, Kevin's...well...I really don't think it's a good idea for him to be working here."

John said "Now, Adam, I know you hired Jim because Stacy recommended him. Just like you did your sister a favor I'm doing a favor. Doug Thompson is also one of my oldest and most valued customers so, like you, I'm doing a favor for someone."

Adam was stunned.

"But Jim has the skills for the job, Kevin doesn't."

John was not swayed.

"So you and Jim can teach him."

Jim said "With all due respect, I don't think he's teachable. He accidentally burned his own house to the ground last year."

Kevin took offense.

"Hey, that's, like, a lie, dude!"

Rolling his eyes, Jim said "Kevin, I was there. You tried to put out a small fire by pouring liquor on it and burned down your own house."

"Sounds about right" added Adam.

John said "I understand your misgivings but I believe in giving people a chance. I expect that you'll do the same."

Both Jim and Adam were filled with dread.

* * *

 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**  
 **Music:** "Bringin' Sexy Back" by Justin Timberlake

Quinn and Jim are on the couch as Jim rants about Kevin.

"...and when I tried to show him how to repair a damaged tire he accidentally torched some kerosine soaked rags. Thank God the fire extinguisher was in easy reach."

Quinn tried to get her boyfriend to see the bright side.

"Try to think of it this way, honey: at least you're getting paid to do something you enjoy."

Jim said "That's why I'm sticking with this job despite the presence of a total moron. I can't believe you tutored him in high school. You must have the patience of a saint. How did you do it?"

"Repitition," said Quinn, "I figured out early on that if you just keep at it with him it'll eventually sink in. "

There's a knock on the door.

"I'll get it" said Quinn.

She gets up and opens the door. It's Nicole.

"Nicole! How are you?"

"I'm good," said Nicole, "I thought I'd pay a visit and catch up."

"Come on in."

Quinn closed the door behind Nicole and leads her to the sofa.

"So, Jim," Nicole asked, "How's the new job?"

Jim said "Great except for one thing: I work with Kevin Thompson."

Nicole's eyes went wide.

"Kevin! Granted, I only met him once but my impression is he's an idiot."

"You aren't wrong," said Jim, "The rest of us have to freakin' babysit him."

"Ouch!" said Nicole, "You have my sympathies."

* * *

 **Rowe Automotive, the next day...**  
 **Music:** "Working Man" by Rush

Jim was in the garage doing a tune up while Kevin watched intently.

Jim asked "Kevin, could you hand me the manifold, please?"

Kevin stared at the manifold for the car Jim is working on. He then picked up a rag and folded it many times over. He hands it to Jim.

"Here you go, dude."

Jim was both puzzled and annoyed.

"A rag?"

Kevin proudly said "Folded many times, like you said."

Jim rolled his eyes.

"Do you even know what a manifold is?"

Kevin scratched his head.

"Ummm...uhhh...hmmm...no."

Jim walked over to the manifold on the table, picked it up and showed it to Kevin.

"This is a manifold. It pumps air into the engine. I took it out of the car I'm working on so I could check the fuel injection. I asked you to bring it over so I can screw it back on."

Kevin asked "Why do you need to pump air into the engine?"

Jim explained "Because the way a car runs is like this: while fuel is sprayed into the cylinders the manifold pumps in oxygen so that when the fuel hits the spark plugs it sets off an explosion. The force of the explosion moves the pistons, which move everything else. Do you follow me so far?"

"I think so," said Kevin, "Where do the nitrous tanks go?"

Trying not to lose his patience, Jim said "This car doesn't have nitrous tanks."

Kevin asked "Aren't we supposed to put them in?"

Jim explained "Kevin, we aren't tricking out this car for racing. It's just a simple tune up."

Kevin was amazed.

"I didn't know that cars had guitar strings. Cool!"

Groaning, Jim shook his head.

* * *

**Nicole's apartment, the next day...**

Quinn and Nicole were chatting over tea. Since it's daytime Nicole is fully clothed (remember, the nudism is strictly an evening thing with her).

Quinn said "This herbal tea is great, Nicole."

"Thanks, Quinn," said Nicole, "How's Jim?"

Quinn said "He came home in a really lousy mood last night. Dealing with Kevin is wearing on his nerves. Yesterday he tried to show Kevin how to do a tune up but Kevin kept goofing off. After his lunch break Jim caught Kevin joyriding on the hydralic lift."

"Isn't that dangerous?" asked Nicole.

Quinn nodded.

"Kevin fell, but Jim broke the fall. I wish I could do something to cheer him up."

Nicole suggested "Take a day off and surprise him at work. I did that once."

"I just might do that," said Quinn. Changing the subject, she then asked "By the way, how are you in the relationship department."

"Well," said Nicole, "No dates, no hookups, no relationships of any kind lately. This town has a problem with eligable guys leaving as soon as they can. The ones who stick around never seem to be worth the effort."

Quinn said "Tell me about it. I think that's one of the reasons I didn't get serious with guys until college. Thank God Jim came along when he did."

"I know," said Nicole, "Nuns get more romance and sex than I do. Maybe I should lower my standards." After a pause, Nicole said "Nah!"

Both women laughed.

Quinn jokingly said "Well, there's always lesbianism."

"Not for me," said Nicole, "Women are too high maintenance."

They both laughed again.

* * *

**Rowe Automotive, the next day...**

Kevin was in the front shop working the cash register while a customer pays for an oil change.

"Okay, that comes out to...five bucks."

The customer's eyes went wide with disbelief.

"For an oil change? Are you sure?"

"Positive" said Kevin.

The customer gave Kevin a ten. Kevin put it in the register and gave the customer his change. The customer looked at his change before looking back at Kevin.

"This is a fifty. I gave you a ten."

"Exactly," said Kevin, "Five times ten is fifty, so that's your change."

The customer grinned upon realizing Kevin's too stupid to figure a bill properly and proceeded to take full advantage of this fact.

"Thanks."

"No problem, dude."

The customer left feeling cocky that he'd just gotten away with ripping the place off. After he was gone Jim and Adam entered the store.

"How's it going, Kevin?" asked Adam.

Smiling, Kevin said "It's going great, Adam."

Jim looked at the latest bill.

"At least you charged him the right price for an oil change. Twenty for oil, twenty for parts and ten for labor."

"That's right, dude," said a proud Kevin, "For a total of five bucks."

Jim and Adam's eyes went wide.

"It's supposed to be fifty bucks!" Jim exclaimed.

Kevin explained "The change was fifty. He owed five and gave me a ten so I gave him fifty."

Adam's jaw dropped when he heard that.

"WHAT!?!"

Jim immediately opened the register and was dismayed to find only the ten that the last customer had given. Taking the ten and glaring menacingly at Kevin, Jim asked "Kevin, how do you calculate a bill?"

"Duh, dude," said Kevin, "You divide the total by ten, then, like, multiply what they give you by ten and give them back that."

Jim and Adam both stared daggers at Kevin. They called him the exact same thing at the exact same time...

"DUMBASS!!"

* * *

**Act III**   
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Sitting on the couch Quinn listens patiently while Jim unloads about Kevin's incompetence.

"...he actually bilked the place out of the whole days take. He's such a moron he can't even work a cash register. He's got both Adam and I on the verge of going nuts."

Quinn said "What I don't get is why Stacy's father hired him in the first place."

"Nepotism," said Jim, "Adam told me the whole story. Apparently, when Mr. Rowe first opened the place back in '79 the very first customer was a 16 year old Doug Thompson, who's been a loyal customer ever since." After a frustrated sigh, he added "I don't know how much more of this shit I can take."

"Then why don't you quit?" asked Quinn.

Jim explained "Two reasons. One, Kevin is the only part of the job I don't like. Two, I just got this job. I leave now and it won't look good on my resume. The only way I'm not stuck in a shitty situation is if Kevin gets fired, and I doubt that'll happen."

Quinn stroked Jim's hand. In a sexually suggestive tone, she said "Why don't I do something to make you feel better?"

"Not tonight," said Jim, "I have a headache."

"Isn't that supposed to be my line?"

* * *

 **Rowe Automotive, the next day...**  
 **Music:** "Ain't No Other Man" by Christina Aguilera

Kevin was showing Brittany around the front shop.

"...and this door leads to, like, the garage. This is where we fix cars."

Brittany was impressed.

"Oh, Kevie, that's so manly!"

Kevin blushed.

"Aw, babe!"

He and Brittany started to passionately make out right there. One of the customers, a blonde mother with a little girl, covers her daughter's eyes and stares daggers at Kevin and Brittany. At this point, Jim emerged from the garage and was not amused by the PDA.

"Kevin!"

Kevin and Brittany stop making out.

Jim said "Since you can't be trusted to figure a bill properly Adam and I decided to take turns working the register. I need you in back to help Adam with an oil change."

"Okay" said Kevin.

He went in back while Jim walked up to the cash register.

**The garage, a moment later...**

Adam was lowering the hydralic lift, which had an SUV on it. After the car is lowered he turns to Kevin.

"Okay, Kevin, I already did all of the hard stuff. I drained out the old oil, rotated the tires and put in a new filter."

Adam then popped the hood of the SUV. He pointed to the cap where the oil is supposed to go in.

"All you have to do is put fresh oil in the car. Can you do that?"

Kevin said "Of course, dude."

"Good," said Adam, "I'm taking my lunch break. Tell Jim when you're done so he can ring the customer up."

* * *

**A short time later...**

Quinn's Impala pulled up to the building. After shutting off the engine she emerged with a tray covered in foil.

_Jim's been in such a lousy mood. Maybe I can cheer him up with this surprise visit._

**The front shop, a moment later...**

Quinn entered through the front door. Jim was pleasantly surprised to see his girlfriend.

"Quinn! What are you doing here?"

Quinn said "The other night Nicole suggested I cheer you up with a surprise visit, so I brought you some lunch."

"What did you bring?" asked Jim.

"Lasagna," said Quinn, "The real kind that you showed me how to make, not the frozen junk I grew up on."

Jim smiled.

"I can take my lunch break after we finish changing the oil in Mrs. Benson's SUV."

Mrs. Benson was the blonde mother with the little girl.

**Meanwhile, in the employee lounge...**

Adam was eating a sandwich when his father, John, came in.

"Adam, you've got a phone call."

Adam put down his sandwich and followed his father out of the lounge.

**The garage, at that very moment...**

Kevin looks at the SUV.

_I forgot to ask Adam where we keep the oil._

Kevin headed toward the lounge, absent mindedly walking past a shelf full of fresh motor oil.

**The lounge, a minute later...**

Kevin entered.

"Yo, Adam..."

He then noticed that Adam isn't there.

"Aw, Man!" said Kevin, "How am I gonna find the oil now?"

That's when Kevin saw a bottle of olive oil on the counter.

"Well, oil's oil" he said with a shrug. Kevin then took the bottle of olive oil and left.

**The garage, a minute later...**

Kevin was pouring the olive oil into Mrs. Benson's SUV. He then screwed the cap back on and tried to think.

_What am I supposed to do next?_

Kevin struggles to think until he remembers what Adam told him, but not all of what Adam told him.

"Rotated the tires."

Kevin smiled.

_Of course, I'm supposed to rotate the tires._

Kevin closed the hood and raised the hydraulic lift. Next, he used the air wrench to unbolt the tires. He spun each tire in his hand before putting it back on and forgetting to re-tighten the bolts.*

*(As someone who's been working on cars my whole life I can tell you that is NOT how you rotate tires.)

* * *

**The front shop, a short time later...**

Quinn was sitting and entertaining Mrs. Benson's little girl while an irate Mrs. Benson was talking to Jim.

"What's taking so long?"

An also annoyed Jim said "I'm begining to wonder the same thing myself."

Just then Kevin came in from the garage.

"The SUV's ready to go."

"It's about time."

Jim proceeded to ring her up.

**The employee lounge, a few minutes later...**

Adam was finishing his lunch when Quinn and Jim entered.

"Hi, Adam" said Quinn.

Pleasantly surprised to see his little sister's BFF, Adam said "Quinn, what brings you here?"

Quinn said "I surprised Jim by bringing him lunch. Care to join us?"

"I can't," said Adam, "I just ate."

Jim looked at the counter. "Where's my olive oil? I was originally just going to have a salad for lunch and I brought my own olive oil and vinegar to use as a dressing. The olive oil's gone."

At this point, Kevin entered.

"I almost forgot, we're outta oil."

Adam said "No we aren't."

"We are," said Kevin, "There was only one bottle of it in here which I put in that lady's SUV."

Jim, Adam and Quinn's eyes all went wide.

"OH, SHIT!" said Jim.

He, Adam and Quinn all run out of the lounge.

**Outside, a few seconds later...**

They all arrive to see Mrs. Benson leave in her SUV just as it's wheels come off and it slides across the parking lot before crashing into a parked car. After this, Jim and Quinn ran towards the wreckage. As they approach the wredked vehicle they both breaths a sigh of relief as Mrs. Benson and her daughter emerge visibly shaken but unharmed.

"Mrs. Benson!" said Jim, "Are you alright? What happened?"

Shaking, Mrs. Benson said "My car started making weird noises and suddenly the wheels flew off."

With a suspicion as to why this happened, Adam turned towards Kevin.

"Kevin, did you do something other than put oil in the car?"

Kevin said "I rotated the tires."

Rolling his eyes, Adam said "Jim and I already did that."

"Oh! Sorry, bro."

Kevin then scratched his head in thought. His eyes went wide when he remembered something.

"Aw, Man! I forgot to fasten the tires when I put them back on!"

Jim, Quinn and Mrs. Benson all stared daggers at Kevin.

* * *

**Pizza King, the next day...**

Quinn and Nicole were having lunch and talking. Quinn was telling her what happened the previous day.

"...so after that Mr. Rowe had no choice but to fire Kevin."

"I bet Jim's happy about that" said Nicole.

"He is," Quinn replied, "Now that Kevin's gone Jim actually enjoys his new job."

"I wonder what Kevin will do now" said Nicole.

* * *

**Lawndale High, day...**

The current principal, Mr. DeMartino, was seated behind his desk while Superintendent Cartwright was seated across from him.

"Mr. Cartwright," DeMartino growled, "To WHAT do I owe THIS VISIT?

Mr. Cartwright said "I understand that the football coach was recently let go for drinking on the job."

"I am ALREADY conducting interviews for the POSITION."

Mr. Cartwright said "The thing is that Steven Taylor is a major contributer to the school system and his son in law needs a job. He promised a fat contribution if we make the young man the new football coach."

At this point an excited Kevin entered the office.

"Hey, Mr. D! I'm the new football coach! Pretty cool, huh?"

Both of Mr. DeMartino's eyes bulge out of their sockets.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

**End Episode.**


	4. Cosplayed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All of the main characters are invited to a costume party for Halloween. Love is in the air...and so's a violent thunderstorm...and did I mention the ware wolf?

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Cosplayed"**   
**story by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Quinn and Jim's apartment complex, evening...**

Quinn was in the mail room opening her and Jim's PO box. She got out the mail, shut the box and left.

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, a short time later...**

Quinn was at her kitchen table going through the mail.

 _Bill, bill, coupon book, Cosmo...that's definetly for me. Motor Trend...Jim. Playboy...eww, definetly Jim._ Her eyes went wide when she got to the last bit of mail. _Thomas Sloane!?_

Quinn opened the letter from Tom. It reads:

"Quinn Louise Morgendorffer and James Giovanni Carbone are cordially invited to the home of Thomas Jefferson Cornelius Sloane for a costume party to be held on Saturday, October the 28th, 2006."

Quinn has an intrigued expression on her face.

* * *

**Chuck and Stacy's house, afternoon...**

Sandi was seated on the couch looking like royalty while Quinn, Stacy, Nicole and Tiffany are sitting cross legged on the floor.

To Quinn, Nicole whispered "Is this what it was like when you had that Fashion Club back in high school?"

"Pretty much," Quinn whispered back, "Except that none of us had the nerve to stand up to Sandi back then."

Not hearing this, though she would've been powerless to do anything if she had, Sandi said "Thank you for letting us get together at your house, Stacy."

"Don't mention it," said Stacy, "My house is the only place with enough room."

Sandi proceeded right to the point.

"I wanted us all to get together because of this."

She pulled a letter from her purse. It's from Tom Sloane and identical to the one that Quinn and Jim recieved.

"It appears that all five of us have been invited to a costume party to celebrate Halloween. I thought we should come up with costume ideas and co-ordinate."

While Quinn was unimpressed Sandi enjoyed the illusion of being Queen Bee again.

Just like a Fashion Club meeting. Some things really do never change she thought. Out loud, however, Quinn said "That sounds like a good idea, Sandi."

Nicole was making mental notes of what was going on. She noted how Sandi was conducting herself with a regal bearing while Quinn's obedience seemed less than sincere. _Obviously_ Nicole thought, _Quinn was the only one to stand up to Sandi for the longest time. I guess what broke up that Fashion Club was Quinn's backbone rubbing off on Stacy and Tiffany._ Nicole next noted how Stacy seemed scared to contradict anyone while Tiffany seemed to be blissfully unaware of the going ons as she touched up her make up. Nicole drew some conclusions. _I've never seen Stacy so nervous in all the years I've known her. She must've been the doormat of the group. In a way, it explains why she's so assertive now. She's making up for all the years of letting Sandi walk all over her_. Her next conclusion concerned Tiffany. _Tiffany's so thoughtless that she'll do whatever she's told. I didn't believe it when Quinn and Stacy told me but, now that I see them falling back into old patterns, I can actually imagine Sandi as a domineering bitch and Tiffany and Stacy as her docile followers_. Next, Nicole frowned. _Then again, was I really so different in my head cheerleader days?_

"So," said Sandi, "I now open the floor for suggestions." She then turned to Stacy. "What do you think." The haughty tone made it clear that it was actually an order disguised as a question.

"Well," Stacy nervously said, "Chuck wants to go as Hugh Hefner, so I guess I'll go as a playmate." After a moment's hesitation, she added "If that's alright with you, Sandi."

To avoid Sandi walking all over her Quinn immediately chimed in with "That sounds like a good idea."

Sandi agreed, to the relief of everyone.

"Very well. We all pick a costume that is sexy. I'll go as a French Maid. Tiffany, what will you go as?"

Tiffany stopped re-applying makeup and stared blankly.

"Whaat?"

Quinn looked at Tiffany. Yet one more thing that never seems to change.

"We're all invited to a costume party. Sandi wants to know what you plan to go as. Something sexy."

"Hooww...adoout...I...gooo...aaas...aaa...nuuun?"

Nicole rolled her eyes.

"Tiffany, do you ever pay attention?"

Sandi shot Nicole a mean look. Nicole responded by eyeing her with determination not to take any crap.

Just like Quinn Sandi thought, But she's right. Out loud, Sandi said "Tiffany, dear, Nicole's right. Nuns are simply not sexy."

"I know!" said Quinn, "Tiffany, you could go as either a sexy witch or a succubus."

Tiffany was confused.

"Suuucccuuuu...whaat?"

Nicole proceeded to explain.

"A succubus is a female demon that seduces mortal men."

"Whaat?"

Nicole was exasperated by Tiffany's obvious cluelessness.

"Don't bother," Quinn explained, "Even after hours of explaining it she still won't get it."

Nicole said "In that case..." She turned towards Tiffany. "Tiffany, I'll go as a succubus and you go as a sexy witch. How does that sound?"

"Ooookaaaayy."

"Well," said Quinn, "Since Nicole's going as a succubus I'll go as a sexy angel. It'll make a nice contrast."

Sandi nodded approvingly.

* * *

**A sidewalk, later that day...**  
 **Music:** "Move Along" by All American Rejects

Sandi was walking home from Stacy's. She was deep in thought as she walked.

_That was a little too much like a Fashion Club meeting. I just can't seem to help being the queen bee. Why can't I just be human? They aren't my followers, they're my friends. No, more than that, they're the only family I have._

Sandi was so lost in thought that she immediately crashed into someone. They both avoid falling, however.

"Hey, watch it!" Sandi barked.

Her eyes went wide in shock when she saw who it was. It's Joey, one of the three J's. Yes, that Joey. He now has short hair with frosted tips but otherwise looks the same as he did in high school. He recognized Sandi.*

*(Relax, he's not going to turn into an abusive jerk this time around.)

"Sandi Griffin!?"

"Joey Black!?"

**Starbucks, a short time later...**

Sandi and Joey were catching up over coffee.

"So, what have you been doing since high school?" she asked.

Joey said "Jeffy went to State U while me and Jamie went to Lawndale State."

"How are they?"

"I don't know," Joey admitted, "After 9/11 Jamie dropped out and joined the Army. I lost touch with him after that. Jeffy stayed at State U and after a while I lost touch with him, too. I got a degree in business and now I work at Grace, Sloan and Paige. You?"

Sandi sighed. She was afraid this would come up.

"To be honest, my life hasn't been all that great since graduation. I went to Carter Community College but had to drop out after one year. I was forced to live in a homeless shelter until I could get a job."

Joey was stunned. Sandi braced herself for a put down.

"What happened?" he asked, "Why did you drop out and have to live in a shelter until you got a job?"

Sandi was surprised that Joey's tone isn't condescending at all. He's geniunely concerned.

Sandi said "I...well...Let's just say that my mother and I had a falling out. She cut me off. I dropped out of college because I couldn't afford it."

"What happened?"

Sandi said "If you don't mind, it's not something I like to talk about."

Joey accepted this. "So, what are you doing now?" he asked.

This made Sandi nervous as she doesn't want him knowing that she's a stripper.

"I...I'd rather not say. It's kind of embarrassing."

She decided to change the subject.

"I'm surprised you didn't ask me about Quinn."

Joey said "I didn't think about Quinn until you mentioned her just now. In fact, this is the first time I've thought about her in years."

"You're over your crush on her, then?" Sandi asked in a surprisingly hopeful tone.

Joey explained "Once she wasn't around all the time she was surprizingly easy to get over. Now that I think back to those days I wanna kick myself. So many other girls I could've been happy with and I had to waste all of my time and energy pursuing Quinn, who no guy had a chance with."

Sandi actually smiled warmly when she heard this, which Joey noticed.

"You know" he said, "you're actually very beautiful when you smile. You should do it more often."

Now Sandi blushes slightly.

"Since you brought it up," Joey continued, "What has Quinn been doing these past five years?"

Sandi said "She came back to Lawndale after graduating college. She's now her father's business partner. She also has a live in boyfriend, Jim Carbone."

"That's cool," said Joey, proving that he really was long over his crush, "Are you seeing anyone?"

"Unfortunately, no," said Sandi, "You?"

Joey frowned.

"Recently dumped. She ditched me for some guy she was screwing on the side."

Sandi looked sympathetic.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Quinn and Jim were at the kitchen table having dinner and talking.

"What are you going as, Jim?" Quinn asked.

Jim said "I haven't decided yet. You?"

"I'm going as a sexy angel."

"Sweet" said Jim.

Quinn now looks thoughtful.

"Jim, why did Tom invite all of us, even people he doesn't know very well?"

Jim said "My theory is that he's starting on a downward spiral a la Howard Hughes."

Quinn, who no longer pretends to be an airhead, giggles. The phone rings.

"I'll get it."

Quinn answers the phone.

"Hello...Oh, Hi, Sandi."

On the other end of the line, Sandi said "Quinn, you will not believe who I ran into today. Remember Joey Black?"

Quinn said "One of my three most devoted admirers in high school. How could I forget? How is he?"

"He works at Grace, Sloane and Paige now," said Sandi, "He apparently is the guy who replaced Jim at his old job. He's also been invited to the costume party."

Quinn suddenly had a very suspicious expression.

"I wonder why Tom invited all of us. I get why he invited me, Jim and Joey, but he also invited you, Stacy, Chuck, Nicole, Tiffany, Kevin and Brittany and he barely knows any of you guys."

Sandi said "Stacy's 401K is handled by Grace, Sloane and Paige so that might be how Tom knows her. I have no idea why he invited anyone else, though. To the matter at hand. Joey and I got to talking and he was complimenting me. It was really sweet."

Quinn had a knowing look on her face.

"Why don't you go with him to the party? You know, like a date."

Sandi was suddenly nervous.

"Um, Quinn, I don't think that's a good idea. We had coffee and caught up, but that was the first time I've seen him since high school. I barely know what kind of person he is now."

Quinn said "Sandi, the way you're talking about him makes it obvious that you're interested. Maybe he's interested too."

Sandi explained her misgivings.

"Quinn, I didn't tell him everything. He knows I had a falling out with my mother but he doesn't know that I was disowned for being bisexual."

Quinn dismissed this concern.

"Sandi, he's a guy. He'll probably think it's a turn on that you go both ways."

Sandi revealed the other thing she didn't mention to Joey.

"I also didn't tell him that I'm a stripper. What if he holds it against me?"

"If he does then he's not worth it. Just think about it. You obviously like him."

Sandi's confidence gained a second wind as it dawned on her that Quinn's right.

"Okay. Bye, Quinn."

"Bye, Sandi."

They hang up.

"What was that about?" asked Jim.

Quinn said "Sandi ran into Joey Black. He's one of those guys I told you about, from high school."

"The ones who spent all four years trying to woo you?"

Quinn sits down and looks serious as she suddenly had a suspicion of Tom's motives.

"Jim, I'm worried. I think Tom wants to humiliate you in front of everyone you know."

Dismissive, Jim said "Quinn, he's more mature than that. Tom's not vindictive or evil, just unintentionally inconsiderate. He does tend to be a dick without realizing it."

Quinn realized that all she had to go on was a gut instinct.

"It's just, well, you know how I worry."

"Quinn, it's okay," Jim reassured, "You grew up here so it's inevitable that I'll run into guys who used to have a crush on you. It's really no big deal."

Quinn was relieved...but still suspicious.

* * *

**Montage...**  
 **Music:** "Buttons" by the Pussycat Dolls

We see a montage of each of the Former Fashion Clubbers changing into their costumes. We start with Quinn taking off her shirt. Cut to outside her window and we see her sillouette begin to remove her bra. Next, we see Sandi emerge from her bathroom wrapped in a towel. She begins to untie the towel. Cut to her feet and we see the towel land on the floor behind her. Now that I've serviced those of you with a foot fetish we cut to Stacy. Stacy begins to unbutton her shirt. Cut to Tiffany applying eye shadow. After this, we see an open drawer. Quinn's hand reaches in and pulls out a white mini skirt. Next, Sandi's hand picking up a pair of black fishnet pantyhose. Next, we see Chuck in his red silk bathrobe. Cut to his POV and we see Stacy from the shoulders up. The camera starts to move down but cuts out before we see anything inappropiate. Cut to a close up of Quinn's legs as she pulls the mini skirt up. Cut to Sandi's foot as she begins to pull the fishnets up. Next, a sillouette of Stacy and Chuck making out. Cut to a dishelved Chuck putting his bathrobe back on. Cut to a shot of Stacy placing the bunny ears on her head. Cut to Quinn putting a halo on. Next, Stacy checking herself out in the mirror. She is wearing a blue Playboy bunny suit with sequenced high heel shoes. Cut to Chuck dressed as Hugh Hefner.

"Grrrr, feisty."

Cut to Sandi checking herself out in the mirror. Her maid outfit is a low cut black mid-driff top with white lace that shows a lot of cleavage. She has a black mini-skirt with white lace and a small apron. She has fishnet panty hose and black hig heel shoes.

Sandi thought _All of the guys are going to drool over me._

Cut to Quinn and Jim's apartment. Jim is wearing a medium blue military uniform with an image of a red cobra with it's hood raised emblazoned on the front. He then takes a replica of an SS battle helmit that he's painted the same shade of blue as the uniform. Over the front Jim had attached a two way mirror that would cover his entire face. He put this helmit and mask on and stood in front of the mirror. He did the 'Heil Hitler' salute but instead of chanting that phrase he chanted something else while altering his voice to give it a hissing sound.

"COBRA!"

He smiled at his acting job. At this point Jim's jaw drops as the door to the bedroom opens. Cut to his POV and we see Quinn in her angel costume. She has a halo on her head. The top is a lacy white teddy that is transparent except on the bra portion that shows a lot of midriff and cleavage that has white dove wings on the back. She's wearing a white mini skirt, so mini in fact that if she sits down or bends over everyone can see her panties. The shoes are white knee-high stiletto boots.

"What do you think, honey?"

"Nice," Jim said in the hissing voice.

Quinn asked "What are you supposed to be?"

"Cobra Commander." When Quinn stared blankly Jim added "GI Joe's arch-nemesis."

* * *

**Act II**   
**Tom's house, evening...**

The house was a white two-story mini-mansion. There is a thunderstorm raging and we hear a loud clap of thunder and a flash of lightning. It is literally a dark and stormy night.

 **Inside...**  
 **Music:** "Dance, Dance, Dance" by Earth, Wind and Fire

The party was in full swing. Everyone is in costumes. Joey's wearing a blue tunic with three gold crowns over chain mail. Cut to Mack dancing with a girl. Kevin and Brittany were dancing. Brittany is wearing her old cheerleading uniform while Kevin is wearing his old football jersey. While Brittany's uniform still fits her perfectly Kevin's jersey is now too tight due to his beer gut and man boobs. At the refreshment table and Chuck, Stacy, Sandi, Quinn and Jim are talking,all in costume.

"Where's Tiffany and Nicole?" Sandi asked.

Stacy added "Yeah, what's keeping her?"

"Maybe they be fashionably late" Quinn suggested half-jokingly.

"Quinn," said Sandi, "There's a difference between fashionably late and just plain rude."

At this point, Nicole arrived. Her succubus costume consists of a red tiara with red devil horns, a lacy red bra with red bat wings attached to the back, transparent red panty hose with a pointed red tail attached over red panties. The look was topped off with red high-heeled sandals.

"Grrrowww," said Chuck, "I like."

"Sorry I'm late" said Nicole. "What do you think of the costume?"

Jim said "I like it." Doing the snake voice again, he chanted "COBRA!"

Nicole giggled.

 **Begin shameless 80's cartoon parody...**  
 **Music:** "GI Joe Theme"

"Maybe you should've come as The Baroness, Quinn." After a moment, Nicole realized "Of course, then Jim would've had to come as Destro instead of Cobra Commander."

Both Jim and Chuck laughed while the girls didn't get it.

Seeing this, Nicole said "I guess I really was the only girl into GI Joe as a kid."

At this point, a black man in an army uniform with a green beret approached and said "That's not true!"

Jim, Chuck and Nicole's faces all lit up in recognition as they said this man's code name.

"Stalker!"

Stalker said "Did you know that at toy and comic book conventions there's actually no shortage of female cosplayers as GI Joe characters. While the most popular character for women is the seductive and evil Cobra agent known as The Baroness there are also cosplayers as Joe's Scarlett and Lady Jaye. In fact, once you get past the stereotypes you realize there are plenty of female GI Joe fans out there."

"But," asked Sandi, "Aren't girls who are into that sort of things lesbians?"

Stalker patiently explained "No. Childhood intereste have no bearing on sexual orientation, nor do adult interests for that matter....and there's nothing wrong with being sexually attracted to the same gender."

"Now we know" said Quinn.

Stalker said "And knowing is half the battle."

_A real American Hero_   
_GI JOE_

Everyone chanted "YO, JOE!"

**Now that I've got that out of my system, on with the story...**

At this point Jim notices something and points.

"There's Tiffany?"

Tiffany was wearing a pointed hat and a black robe over her whole body, showing no curves at all. She has a long fake nose and a fake wart on her left cheek.

"Sooorrry...I'mmm...laate."

A visibly disappointed Sandi asked "Tiffany, what are you supposed to be?"

"I'mmm...aaaa...wiiitch. Isn't...thaat...whaat...weee...agreeeed...onnnn?"

Rolling her eyes, Stacy said "You were supposed to be a sexy witch."

Tiffany doesn't get it.

"Buuut...witches...arrre...uuuugly."

Quinn said "Not sexy witches."

Tiffany stared blankly.

"Whaat?"

Quinn was totally deflated.

"Never mind."

* * *

**A short time later...**

Joey was talking with Kevin and Brittany.

"Dude, long time no see!" said Kevin, "What are you, a ninja?"

Brittany said "Kevy, he's not a ninja. Joey, you're an astronaut, right?"

Joey was a little disappointed to learn that Kevin and Brittany are just as dense as they were in high school.

"I'm Sir Lancelot."

"Cool!" said Kevin, "What team did he play for?"

Joey decided to humor him.

"Knights of the Round Table."

Twirling her hair vacantly, Brittany said "I didn't know there was a football team called Knights of the Round Table."

"Cool!" said Kevin.

Joey sighed. At this point, he spotted Sandi. When Sandi looked over and saw him he smiled and waved. This caused Sandi to blush, which Quinn noticed.

"What are you waiting for, Sandi?" asked Quinn, "Go talk to him."

Sandi haughtily replied "If memory serves, Quinn, the guy is supposed to approach the girl."

Jim said "I saw him smile and wave at you, Sandi. Trust me, he's interested."

"Then why doesn't he come over and talk to me?" Sandi asked.

Jim explained "He thinks you're out of his league and feels intimidated. When Quinn and I met she had to make the first move. I wanted to talk to Quinn first but didn't until she was talking to me. In fact, I remember thinking 'No way a girl that hot would be interested in a dork like me'."

Quinn smiled.

"Boy, were you ever wrong about that. Just go talk to him, Sandi."

Sandi was hesitant at first, but decided to go ahead and do it anyway.

"Okay."

She walked over to Joey.

"Hey."

Joey's face brightened.

"Hi, Sandi. "

Sandi asked "Are you, like, a knight or something?"

"Sir Lancelot" Joey answered.

"That's cool" said Sandi.

Joey looked at the skimpy maid outfit Sandi was wearing and clearly liked what he saw.

"So, you're a sexy maid."

Sandi nodded.

"I like it," said Joey, "You look hot."

Sandi blushed at the compliment. Suddenly, there was a loud crack of thunder followed by the sound of howling coming from outside. Kevin and Brittany both scream.

"What was that?!" asked a frightened Kevin.

Equally scared, Brittany said "Oh, Kevy, I think there's a warewolf outside!"

Sandi rolled her eyes.

"Brittany, there's no such thing as warewolves."

Kevin asked "Like, how would you know?"

Sandi sighed.

**Meanwhile, outside...**

A menacing dog-like creature was lurking about.

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

* * *

**The party, a short time later...**

Quinn, Jim, Tiffany, Nicole, Stacy and Chuck were still talking when they were approached by Tom. Tom is wearing a 40's business suit. The right side of his face looks normal but the left side is made up to look hidoeusly deformed. Quinn eyes him suspisiously.

"Everyone having a good time?" Tom asked.

"Of course" said Jim.

Stacy added "Thanks for inviting us."

"My pleasure." Turning to Jim, Tom said "You're Cobra Commander, right. Nice to meet a fellow supervillian."

Shaking Tom's hand, Jim said "You're supposed to be Two Face, right?"

"One of my favorite super villians" Tom admitted.

Eyeing Tom suspiciously, Quinn said "How apropriate."

Nicole was eyeing Tom, but her look was more lustful than suspicious.

_He's cute!_

Tom was about to ask Quinn about the additude when he saw Nicole in her VERY sexy demon costume.

_She's hot!_

Walking up to her, he said "Tom Sloane, and you are?"

"Nicole Yagami." Shaking his hand, she said "I'm a little curious that you invited me when we've never actually met."

Tom explained "You have Jim to thank for that. He's the one who gave me your address."

Quinn shot her boyfriend an angry look. "Jim," she barked, "You can't give out our friends addresses like that!"

Raising his arms in mock surrender, Jim said "You know how Nicole's been complaining about being single lately. After you showed me the invitation I rang Tom up and asked him to invite her. I thought I was doing everyone a favor."

"Consider yourself forgiven," said Nicole, "And thanks."

Tom said "So, you're Nicole, huh?"

"The one and only" she said in a flirty tone. "Nice place, by the way."

Tom said "I'd be happy to give you a tour." After a moment, he sheepishly added "If you want, that is."

Before Nicole could answer Quinn interrupted.

"Tom, I'd like to have a word with you...in private."

She and Tom leave.

* * *

**The kitchen, a few moments later...**

Quinn and Tom were having a discussion.

"Okay, Quinn, what do you want to talk about?"

Quinn got right to the point.

"Tom, what kind of game are you playing? I mean, except for me, Jim and Joey you don't know anyone here."

Tom noted the cold tone of Quinn's voice.

"Quinn, what's your problem?"

Quinn said "My problem is that last spring you said something to Jim that made him feel so insecure that he nearly ruined Stacy and Chuck's wedding. Then you sent Jim to Japan and..."

"That was my father" Tom interrupted.

"Let me finish," said Quinn, "He leaves Grace, Sloane and Paige and you blacklist him, don't try to deny it. Now you throw a huge party and invite everyone, including a guy who used to have a crush on me. Since you broke up with Daria have you become so bitter that you now get your kicks by making people miserable? And don't lie to me. I always know when a guy is lying to me."

Tom said "If I had it in for Jim, then why do you think I invited him here?"

Quinn replied "You want to make him insecure, that's why I think you invited Joey. You want Jim to make a scene and humiliate himself in public. That's why you invited everyone we know."

"Quinn, you couldn't be more wrong," said Tom in a reassuring voice, "I'm not some petty, embittered person who gets his kicks out of making people miserable. I don't have it in for anyone. I didn't blacklist Jim, I don't know who did. In fact, no one ever called us to reference Jim when he was looking for a job."

"Why'd you invite a bunch of people you don't know, then?" asked Quinn.

Tom sighs and hangs his head in shame. "I wanted to make some new friends. Everyone I know is either an employee, someone who's only nice to me because I'm rich or people who think I'm Satan incarnate. I'm...well, I'm lonely."

Quinn visibly softens.

Tom continued "I invited everyone in the hopes of making new friends and, before you say it, I won't do anything with Nicole that she doesn't want me to do. If I hook up with her it'll be entirely by her initiative. I'm not a player. That whole incident with your sister and Jane back in high school was due to all of us being too naive to get what was going on."

Quinn eyed Tom. Everything in his tone and body language screamed honesty.

"I believe you" said Quinn. Embarrassed, she added "Tom, I'm sorry. I just assumed you blacklisted Jim because I know someone did."

"I can assure you that said someone was not with Grace, Sloane and Page."

"I believe you now," said Quinn, "Sorry I was such a bitch."

"No need to apologize. You were just looking out for your man....and your best friend."

They both smile and return to the party.

* * *

**Later...**

As the party continues everyone's dancing. Nicole and Tom are visibly hitting it off. Meanwhile, Sandi and Joey were hanging out by the refreshment table and visibly enjoying one another's company. Sandi took a deep breath.

"Joey," she said, "Can we talk somewhere in private?"

Joey didn't hesitate.

"Sure."

**A spare room, a short time later...**

Sandi and Joey were seated on the couch and talking.

"Joey" said Sandi, "I need to tell you some things."

"Okay."

Sandi took a deep breath. "I, well, like you. Like, like like you. That's why I need to tell you some things about me, things you might not like."

Joey looks intrigued.

Sandi admitted "I work as a dancer."

"What makes you think I'd have a problem with that?" asked Joey.

Nervous, Sandi said "Because I dance at Cafe Risque. I'm an exotic dancer. I...well, I'm not proud of it but I need the money."

Joey listens as Sandi goes on. "During my first semester at college I discovered I'm actually bisexual. I fell in love with a girl. When we came out to my family my mother completely disowned me. After that, I found out that my girlfriend was cheating on me. With no money I had to drop out of college and take the first job I could get, which was a nude dancer at Cafe Risque. I lived in the homeless shelter until I'd saved enough money to rent an apartment." After sighing, she added "Pathetic, isn't it?"

"No," said Joey, "Sandi, you were dealt a shitty hand and had to make the best of it. I like you. I don't care if you're a stripper, I don't care that you're into both girls and guys. I...well...I actually really like you. Sandi, you're an incredible woman."

Sandi wass both relieved and touched.

"An...And you're an incredible man...Joey."

The way she said his name had a sultry quality to it. Words escape them as Sandi and Joey slowly lean into each other. Finally, they kiss. The first kiss was a tame peck on the lips. The second kiss saw them open their mouths. Sandi sensuously slid her tongue into Joey's mouth. He eagerly sucked Sandi's tongue. Finally, she straddled Joey's lap as they kiss hungrily, their tongues mingling in each other's mouths. As Joey uplled her close Sandi began to grind on him. He then placed his right hand on her left ass cheek and gave it a gentle squeeze. This turned Sandi on so much that she began to moan into Joey's mouth.

"Mmmm...hmmh...hmph..."

With his other hand, Joey began to unzip the back of Sandi's maid costume. Sandi increased the intensity of her kissing and grinding as she wanted him. Suddenly, there's a loud crack of thunder that startles them both, causing the hot and heavy makeout session to abruptly end. A second crack of thunder and a flash of lightning scared them both so much that they looked out the window and saw a snarling dog-like creature. This freaked them both out so much that they screamed the exact same thing...

"AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! WAREWOLF!!!"

They ran out of the room in terror.

* * *

**Act III**   
**Tom's Halloween party...**

While the thunderstorm continues to rage outside the party remains in full swing. Tom and Nicole were talking while Chuck, Stacy, Quinn and Jim watched from the refreshment table.

"See," said Jim, "They're hitting it off."

Impressed, Quinn said "You do have your moments, Jim."

At this point they were approached by Kevin and Brittany. There's another clap of thunder and a howling noise that startles them.

"EEP!" said Stacy as she nearly jumped out of her bunny suit, "What was that?"

Tiffany said "I...thiinnk...it...waaas...thundeerrrrrr."

Stacy said "Not that. The howling sound."

Quinn reassured her.

"Stacy, I'm pretty sure that was just the wind."

Kevin said "No, there's a werewolf out there."

"It's true" Brittany squeaked.

Obviously, no one believed them.

"There's no such thing as werewolves" said Chuck.

Brittany said "That's what Sandi said too."

As if on cue, Sandi and Joey came running toward them.

"There's a werewolf out there!" said a frightened Sandi.

"It's true!" added an equally frightened Joey.

Kevin said "See, I told you."

Quinn rolled her eyes.

"Don't tell me you actually believe Kevin."

"I didn't at first," said Sandi, "But there really is a werewolf out there."

Joey said "We saw it."

Quinn doesn't buy it for a second. She does believe that they are both genuinly scared, though.

"That howling was just the wind and whatever you saw was just a figment of your imagination. There's no such thing as werewolves."

Jim had a thought.

"Maybe it wasn't a figment of their imagination."

Quinn rolled her eyes in disbelief.

"Oh, Jim, not you too."

Jim said "I don't think it was a werewolf, but it might have been a dog."

At this point, Tom and Nicole approached.

"What are you guys talking about?" asked Tom.

Joey said "Me, Sandi, Kevin and Brittany know there's a werewolf out there but no one believes us."

"Well, duh" said Nicole.

Tom added "Okay, you do know that there's no such thing as werewolves."

Sandi said "Joey and I actually saw it."

Nicole points at them with one hand while making a coo-coo jesture with the other and Tom visibly doesn't know whether to laugh or have them put in a mental hospital.

Jim asked "Tom, do you have a dog?"

"No," said Tom, "And I wouldn't leave it out in this weather if I did."

**Meanwhile, just outside the door...**

"Snarrrrrrlllllll!!!! Grrrrrr!!!!!!!"

* * *

**A short time later...**  
 **Music:** "Superstitious" by Stevie Wonder

The group was still debating whether or not there is a werewolf out there.

"Look," said Joey, "I know it sounds crazy but me and Sandi really did see a werewolf."

Stacy was starting to believe them.

"You know, there may be something out there."

Quinn started to lose her patience.

"Stacy, remember that time you wished Sandi would shut up and she got layringitis?"

"Yes, I thought I'd cursed her."

"You didn't curse her," said Quinn, "She got better."

Stacy explained her reasoning.

"Quinn, I don't believe Sandi and Joey saw a werewolf but I do believe that they saw something."

Just then, there was a deafining clap of thunder and the house went dark.

"AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!" everyone screamed in unison.

"Just a power outage," said Tom, "I'll get a flashlight."

As Tom went to get a flashlight the following noise was heard coming from just outside the door...

"AAAWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Kevin, Brittany, Nicole, Sandi and Stacy: "EEP!!"

"It's right outside the front door!" Joey exclaimed.

A now terrified Chuck believes him.

"You were telling the truth!"

Tom came back with a flashlight, at which point Quinn decided she's had enough of this foolishness.

"Gimmie that!"

She snatched the flashlight from Tom and made her way to the door. She opens it and something, we don't know what, but something runs into the house and runs to the kitchen, nearly knocking Quinn over in the process.

"QUINN!!!" Jim shouted.

Kevin screamed "AHHHH!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!!!!"

Jim ran over to Quinn and helped her up.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," said Quinn, "I was just tripped by something."

Sandi said "See, it is a werewolf!"

After a frustrated sigh, Quinn said "It's not a werewolf. It was either a small dog or a cat. I saw where it went."

Quinn walks toward the kitchen when Jim stops her.

"What are you doing?"

Quinn said "Proving there's no werewolf."

She pulls her arm out of Jim's grasp and makes her way to the kitchen. Jim follows her.

* * *

**The kitchen, a short time later...**

Quinn was searching the kitchen with a flashlight while Jim followed her close behind. Suddenly, they heard...

"oooo..ooooo...hmmmm..."

Quinn immediately turned her flashlight on the source of the whimpering. The creature was.....a small German Shepard. The dog was just a puppy. It immediately looked at Quinn with big, sad eyes.

"Awwww!" said Quinn, "Jim, it's a puppy." Turning toward the dog, she said "Come here, puppy. Come on."

The puppy approached Quinn and sniffed her hand. The dogs fur was wet so Jim got a dish rag and handed it to Quinn. As she towels the dog off it starts to happily wag it's tail.

"No collar," Jim observed, "You think it was abandoned?"

Quinn felt something as she toweled the dog off.

"I think so," she said, "I can feel the puppy's rib cage." Quinn looked at the dog. "You poor thing, you must be starving."

Miraculiously, at this moment the lights came back on. Jim looked in the refridgerator and saw some ground beef. He put it in a bowl as Quinn continued cuddling the puppy. Jim hands her the food and she places it before the dog, who immediately gobbles it all up.

"That's why the dog wanted to get in so badly," said Quinn, "It was hungry and scared."

Finished eating, the puppy went to Quinn. She picked the pup off of the ground and cradled him in her arms. Jim saw the shaft, confirming that the dog is male. The dog happily licks Quinn's face.

"Awwww! Aren't you just the most precious little thing?"

Jim asked "What do you wanna do with him?"

"Let's keep him" said Quinn. Turning to the puppy, she added "That's right, little puppy. Mommy will take care of you from now on."

Jim was visibly moved by Quinn's display of maternal instinct.

* * *

**Tom's living room, a minute later...**

Quinn and Jim approached the rest of their group. Quinn was cradling the puppy in her arms and showed him to everyone.

"Here's your werewolf."

Stacy instantly fell in love with the dog.

"Oh, Quinn, that puppy's so cute!"

Stacy rubs the pup behind his ears.

"Are you keeping it?" asked Chuck.

Quinn said "Yes, we decided to name him Storm."

"So, he's a boy?" asked Sandi.

"Yes," Quinn answered, "He was obviously abandoned. He was trying to get in because he was hungry and scared."

Quinn continued to cuddle Storm. Everyone was visibly moved by this.

* * *

**A veterinary office, a few days later...**

Quinn was talking to the vet, a blond fifty-something woman, who has just given Storm his first check up.

The vet said "I estimate his age to be around four months. He should be a little bigger. He's so small because he was malnourished when you found him."

"So, what's his overall health?" asked Quinn.

"Good," the vet answered, "Now that I've given him his shots and he's being fed regularly he should be just fine."

Quinn scratched Storm behind his ears.

"You hear that, Storm? You'll be just fine."

Storm smiled and wagged his tail.

**Outside, a short time later...**

Quinn and Storm have just sat down in her car when her cell phone rings.

"Hello?"

On the other end, a smiling Sandi said "Hey, Quinn."

"Hi, Sandi."

Sandi said "Guess who has a boyfriend now."

Quinn smiled.

"Sandi, that's great! You and Joey are a couple?"

"Yes, we are," said Sandi, "And Nicole has a date with Tom tonight. "

"Looks like we all got something out of this party," said Quinn, "You got a boyfriend, Nicole probably got a boyfriend too and I got a puppy."

Sandi smiled.

"Maybe Tom's not so bad after all."

Both girls laugh.

**End Episode.**


	5. Meet The Carbones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quinn meets Jim's family. To call them dysfunctional would be an understatement.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Meet the Carbones"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**

Late afternoon in Yorktown, VA sees Quinn Morgendorffer and her boyfriend, Jim Carbone, walking along the beach. For those who don't know, in modern times Yorktown's waterfront consists of a public beach on Chesapeake Bay. The reason that they are here instead of in Lawndale is that Quinn and Jim were visiting Jim's family for Thanksgiving. After Jim's father, Tony, left the Army he'd gotten work as a PMC (Private Military Contracter, which is just a politically correct term for 'mercenary'.) at a firm based out of Newport News called Blacksword Security Services and the family has lived in suburban York County ever since. Quinn was holding her dog, Storm, on a leash while admiring the beauty of it all. Jim was very quiet while looking out on the bay, which she noticed.

"You're unusually quiet," said Quinn, "Something on your mind, Jim?"

Jim said "I'm just nervous. I mean, having you over to spend Thanksgiving with my parents has me a little on edge."

"Are you afraid they won't like me?" asked Quinn.

"It's not that," said Jim, "I'm more afraid that they'll embarrass me. Especially if my father tries to pick a fight with me."

Quinn smiled reassuringly.

"Don't worry, Jim. I'm dating you, not them."

Jim continued to look out on the water.

"This place brings back a bad memory," he said, "See, I used to walk out here with my dad in the evenings. Mom wasn't a big fan of his after dinner cigar and Dad...Well, Dad was never a big fan of me. I was about seven or eight when I tried to impress him by building a sandcastle."

Jim started to mimic his father.

"I was like "What do you think, Dad" and he'd be like "I think it's a waste of time, kid. You got too much of an imagination for your own good. You don't go nowheres by dreamin', building castles in the sand." He actually said that to me. I just never seemed to be good enough for him."

Sympathetic, Quinn asked "How old were you when you realized he was wrong?"

Jim sighed.

"Who ever said he was wrong?"

Quinn was saddened to hear him say that.

* * *

**Meanwhile, in Lawndale...**

Jane and Daria were walking up to the front door of the Morgendorffer house.

Jane said "Thanks for letting me spend Thanksgiving with your family this year. Those weirdos at the commune last year were too much even for me."

Daria said "At least you didn't spend last Thanksgiving with a psychotic grandmother and her stuck up friends while watching your cousin be publically humiliated by her now ex-husband."

Jane replied "I wonder if any dysfunction awaits us this year."

"How long have you known my parents?"

"Point taken."

Daria rang the doorbell. Helen answered.

"Daria, Jane, welcome."

Helen hugged Daria.

Daria said "Hi, Mom."

Jane said "Thanks for having me over, Mrs. Morgendorffer."

"Our pleasure" Helen replied.

She lead Daria and Jane into the house. They went to the kitchen where Jake was cooking...something.

Helen said "Jake, Daria and Jane are here."

Jake smiled as he left the stove to hug his daughter.

"Welcome home, kiddo."

Daria said "Hey, Dad."

Jake next acknowledged Jane.

"Hey, Jane-o, long time no see."

Jane smiled and nodded. Jake may be a total goofball, but he's a lovable goofball.

"Hi, Mr. Morgendorffer."

Jake said "You're just in time for my latest culinary creation: Tobasco boiled cabbage a la Jake."

Daria, Jane and Helen frown with dread at the thought of eating such a concoction.

* * *

**Yorktown...**

Quinn and Jim pulled up in his Camaro to a two story house on a suburban street. The house was red brick with white siding and had a porch. Quinn and Jim, with Storm on a leash, walked up to the front door. Jim rings the bell. The door was answered by a petite woman in her fifties with hair that is the same medium brown as Jim's. She is Gina Carbone, Jim's mother.

Jim said "Hi, Mom. We're here."

Gina immediately hugs Jim.

"Jim, how are you?"

"I'm good, Mom."

Gina released Jim from her hug. She immediately smiles at Quinn.

"You must be Quinn. Jim's told me all about you."

They shake hands.

Quinn said "Hello, Mrs. Carbone."

Gina said "Please, call me Gina."

Quinn kindly said "That's a lovely accent you have Gina. Italian?"

Gina nodded. "Born and raised in the Veneto region of Italy."

Jim added "They met and married when my father was stationed in Vicenza."

Gina next looked at the German Shepard puppy that Quinn had on a leash. She immediately kneels and scratches Storm behind the ears. Storm happily wags his tail in response.

Gina said "Well, aren't you just an adorable little puppy." She looks up at Quinn. "What's it's name?"

Quinn said "We named him Storm."

Jim added "We were at a costume party and he broke into the place during a thunderstorm. We decided to keep him."

Gina stands up and smiles at them both. Just then...

"That you, baby brother."

Out came Jim's brother, Chris Carbone, and his wife, Brooke. Chris was a tall and muscular twenty-seven year old with a perfectly chisled face, a California tan, and jet black hair like his father. Brooke was a twenty-seven year old blonde with a dark tan, disporportionately large (and fake) boobs, and speaks with a valley girl accent.

Jim said "Jeez, Chris, do you have to call me that in public?"

Chris said "Embarrassing you's part of the job, Bro."

Brooke shook Jim's hand.

"So, like, I hear you're a mechanic now."

"That's right."

Brooke's voice took on a dismissive tone.

"Oh, that's too bad."

Jim pointed to Quinn.

"I'd like you to meet my girlfriend, Quinn Morgendorffer. Quinn, my brother, Chris, and his wife, Brooke."

Quinn shakes both their hands.

"Pleased to meet you."

Chris said "The pleasure's ours."

Brooke said nothing. As she shook Quinn's hand she looked at Jim in disbelief. As the rest make their way into the house Brooke and Chris stay back for a moment.

Brooke asked "How did a dork like your brother get a hottie like her?"

Chris shrugged.

"Beats the shit out of me."

They join the others in the house.

* * *

**Inside, a few minutes later...**  
 **Music:** "Family Man" by Daryl Hall and John Oates

_Leave me alone_

_I'm a family man_

_And my bark is much worse than my bite_

Inside, the Carbone house has a large living room. Off to the right is a large fireplace and a big screen TV. Two sofas are arranged in an L pattern around the TV. Directly in front is an opening that leads to a dinning room and to the right of that is a door that leads to a downstairs guest room. On the left side of the living room are stairs that lead to an upstairs balcony over the living room that is part of the upstairs hallway. The door farthest to the left is to Jim's old room while the one in the middle is Chris' old room and the one farthest to the left is the master bedroom. On the living room sofa Jim's father, Tony, was watching TV. In addition to Jim, Quinn, Chris and Brooke the other guests in Tony and Gina's home were Tony's mother and his brother, who'd both come down from New York for Thanksgiving. Sitting next to Tony was a fifty year old man in a Hawaiian shirt and khaki pants who's overweight and wears gaudy jewelry. He is Tony's brother, Vito. Quinn takes Storm off of his leash and the dog runs over to Tony, nearly causing him to spill his beer.

"Dammit!" said Tony, "Who's goddamn mutt is this?"

Jim scowled.

"That's my 'goddamn mutt', Dad."

Jim and Quinn walk up to Tony to say hi.

"Hey, Dad."

Tony said "How's the crap job?"

Jim said "I actually like it."

"Don't you back talk me" Tony angrily growled in response, "I'm a war hero. I killed a hundred gooks in 'Nam and got the medals to prove it."

Ignoring his father's boasts about his military record, Jim said "Dad, I'd like you to meet my girlfriend, Quinn."

Quinn said "Pleased to meet you, Mr. Carbone."

She extended her hand but Tony didn't even acknowledge that she's there. Quinn was visibly put off by this.

"Don't mind him," said Vito, who spoke with a heavy New York accent, "He's in one of his bad moods." Smiling politely, Vito got up and walked toward the young couple. "Yo, Jimmy, how ya been?"

Vito and Jim hug.

"I'm good, Uncle Vito. You?"

"You know me, can't keep an old guido down."

Vito turned his attention to Quinn.

"And who's this lovely vision?"

Quinn said "I'm his girlfriend, Quinn Morgendorffer."

When Quinn extended her hand Vito took it in his and kissed it.

"Che bella."

He let go of Quinn's hand. She was visibly flattered.

"I'm Vito, Jim's uncle. I gotta say, my nephew can sure pick 'em."

Tony said "Yeah, he picks one who makes him ditch a great career to work in a garage. Jim, when you gonna learn to control your woman?"

Quinn wants to tell Tony off, but before she can there's a crashing sound from the kitchen. This is followed by an elderly womans voice.

"CHE CAZZO FANGUL MANAGGIA LA MISREIA! SVACEEM FIGLIO DELLA PUTANA! CHE MINCA!"

(A/N: You do not want me to repeat that in English.)

Quinn and Jim head to the kitchen. Inside they find the salad spilled all over the floor and a short woman in her eighties wearing a mumu and scowling. Her name is Angela Carbone, Jim's grandmother. When Angela speaks it's with a heavy New York accent and a voice that's clearly the result of decades of chain smoking.

"I can't believe I dropped the goddamn salad on the floor!"

Quinn and Gina bend over to clean up the mess. Angela noticed Jim and cheered up.

"Oh, Jim, how are you?"

She and Jim hug.

"I'm good, Nonna."

Angela noticed Quinn.

"Who's this?"

Quinn introduced herself.

"I'm Quinn, Jim's girlfriend."

Angela shook Quinn's hand.

"Glad to meet ya, sweetie. Did I ever tell you about the time I met Frank Sinatra in person? If only I'd met him before my late piece of shit husband."

Angela went to the gas stove and used the flame to light a cigarette. Quinn was visibly concerned by this.

* * *

**Meanwhile, in Lawndale...**

Daria and Jane were at Food Lord supermarket getting supplies for Thanksgiving dinner. Daria was pushing the shopping cart while Jane loads it.

Daria said "I'm surprised my parents sent us to stock up. Usually, Mom just calls a catering service."

Jane smirked wickedly.

"Maybe they wanted some alone time. They're probably used to getting it on daily again."

Daria scowled.

"Thank you for an image I'll need a decade of therapy to get over, Jane."

"Hey, what are friends for?"

At this point the two aren't watching where they're going, so naturally they bump into someone.

"Hey, like, watch it!"

Daria and Jane both gasp.

Daria said "Sandi Griffin!?!"

It's Sandi, alright.

"Daria, Jane!?!"

Jane asked "What are you doing here?"

Sandi said "Shopping, duh."

Daria said "I think she meant what are you doing in town for Thanksgiving?"

Now, Sandi looked really sad.

"Quinn didn't tell you?"

Jane asked "Tell us what?"

"That I was disowned after I came out as bisexual."

Daria said "No, she didn't. She did tell us about Joey, though. Why aren't you spending Thanksgiving with him?"

Sandi explained "We've only been a couple for a few weeks. It's too soon for that. Also, he's spending Thanksgiving with his grandparents in Florida and I can't take time off for...reasons." Those reasons being that I'm a stripper booked to perform at a bachelor party on Friday.

Jane asked "So, what are you doing for Thanksgiving, then?"

Sandi looked even more sad.

"Eating alone with a TV dinner."

Jane can't help grinning at the irony, which Sandi noticed.

Sandi said "Yes, I know you've always wanted to do that."

Jane visibly felt bad for Sandi.

"Until I tried it. The reality didn't live up to the fantasy."

Sandi said "Well, it was...interesting to talk to you."

Sandi was about to leave when Jane gave Daria a pleading look.

"Sandi, hold up a minute. Daria, no one should be alone on Thanksgiving. I already learned that the hard way."

Daria sighed.

"Fine. Sandi, would you like to spend Thanksgiving with us?"

Sandi didn't know whether to be shocked or touched.

* * *

**Act II**   
**Yorktown, evening...**

At Casa Carbone the whole family was sitting down and having dinner. The food is lasagna. Real lasagna, not the microwave crap that Helen serves to save time. Quinn actually enjoys this.

Gina said "So, you really never had real lasagna before meeting Jim?"

"No," Quinn admitted, "My mom was a total workaholic who served microwave lasagna to free up more time to take phone calls from the office."

Angela took another drag on her cigarette.

"Oh, you poor thing! That microwave shit's about as real as a two dollar Rolex. It tastes like goddamn horses ass."

Tony rolled his eyes.

"So, your mother was the real man of the house. That explains a lot."

Quinn noted the hostility in Tony's voice.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Tony explained "It means that you were raised with an ass backwards view of gender. Your mother was the man and your father was the woman in that marriage. So that's why you've got my spineless younger son totally whipped."

Gina said "Tony, could we not, please?"

Tony resumed eating while Quinn stared daggers at him. Jim was noticeably uncomfortable.

Deciding to break the tension, Chris asked "So, Quinn, what do you do for a living?"

Quinn said "I'm a marketing consultant. When my father had a heart attack I ran the business for him while he recovered. I was so good at it that when my father was able to work again he made me his business partner."

Tony immediately pounced on this information.

"So you make more money than Jim, huh? Some damn man."

"Tony!" Gina sternly warned.

Tony immediately backed off.

Vito said "Don't mind my brother, Quinn."

Chris added "Yeah, he's just trying to toughen Jim up. He doesn't mean to be such a jerk."

Tony seems to have no problem with his eldest son calling him a jerk.

Jim said "Yeah, you get used to him being like that."

Tony does have a problem with his younger son saying that, however. He stares menacingly at Jim.

"You got a problem wit' me, you ingrate?"

Gina said "Now, Tony..."

"Quiet, woman! Men are talking!"

Tony got up and walked over to Jim and Quinn, trying to intimidate them both by towering over them.

"I said do you got a problem wit' me. Now, answer me or I kick your girly ass."

Nervous, Jim said "No, I...I was just explaining to Quinn that..."

Tony immediately smacked Jim upside the head before returning to his seat.

"Speak only when spoken to from now on, you pussy!"

Brooke, Chris' wife, decided to break the tension.

"So, like, what are the sleeping arrangements?"

Tony commanded "You and Chris in Chris' old room, my mother and Jim in Jim's old room, Vito in the guest room."

Quinn was now more than a little upset.

"Hey! What about me and the dog?"

Tony said "Dog sleeps wit' Jim and Ma."

Gina stared daggers at her husband.

"Tony, honey, where will Quinn sleep?"

"Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. Jim, after dinner I want you to set up the tent in the back yard."

Quinn and Jim both stare daggers at Tony. Tony's response was to shake his fist at them both.

"You don't like it you can both sleep in the f---in' street."

Quinn and Jim both sigh.

* * *

**Meanwhile, in Lawndale...**  
 **Music:** "All the Pretty Faces" by The Killers

In the kitchen of the Morgendorffer house Daria, Jane, Jake and Helen were having dinner. Like the Carbones, they're having lasagna. Unlike the Carbones, this is the pre-packaged microwave shit that has been a staple of the Morgendorffer diet since God knows when.

Daria said "There's no place like home. Especially since home cooked means put in the microwave for five minutes."

Helen asked "So, how was the shopping trip? Did you get everything?"

Jane said "Turkey: check, microwaveable vegetables: check, microwave stuffing: check, pre-baked pumpkin pie: check."

Daria added "Workaholic Thanksgiving menu: check."

Helen ignored the sarcasm.

"So, I guess that covers everything."

Daria said "Almost. It seems we're having another guest for dinner tomorrow."

Jane explained "We ran into Sandi Griffin at the supermarket. It seems she'll have to spend Thanksgiving alone since her family disowned her. I invited her out of pity. I hope you don't mind."

Helen said "Not at all" while thinking Especially since it's a great way to stick it to Linda.

Jake looked angry.

"She was disowned by her family!? They want nothing to do with her!? Oh, do I ever know what that's like! Being shut out! Having a parent hate your guts because they don't approve of your views! Having your father scream "HOW DARE YOU BRING THAT COMMUNIST SLUT HERE" WHEN I INTRODUCED HELEN TO MY PARENTS. WRITING ME OUT OF THE WILL FOR MARRYING HER BECAUSE OLD MAD DOG WAS A RIGID, PSYCHOTIC, HEARTLESS BASTARD WHO..."

Helen immediately stepped in.

"JAKE!"

This snapped Jake out of his rant.

"Sorry. We'd love to have Sandi over."

He soon becomes angry again. He stares at the floor and shakes his fist.

"ROT IN HELL, OLD MAN!!!!!"

Daria and Jane each roll their eyes.

* * *

**Yorktown, later that evening...**  
 **Music:** "Out Here All Night" by Damone

Outside, it's raining, the result of a late fall noreaster. In the Carbones backyard is a tent. Inside the tent Quinn is in her pajamas. She's not sleeping, she's too pissed off for that. She is sitting up and fuming.

_God, Jim's father has got to be the biggest jerk on the planet. He's even worse than Grandma Emma._

Quinn smiled as she had a thought.

_I should arrange a meeting between those two. If I'm lucky they'll take each other out._

At this point the tent flap opened. In hopped Storm, who immediately cuddles up to Quinn. While Quinn pets Storm, Jim comes in. He folded his umbrella and sat next to Quinn.

Quinn asked "What happened?"

Jim said "Nonna Angela snores and when Storm started whinning she woke up and threw us out. Dad was so pissed that he forced me to join you out here, which I do gladly...although Dad punched me when I said so."

Quinn looked both curious and sympathetic.

"Jim, why does your father hate me so much?"

"It's more about sticking it to me than anything to do with you" Jim explained.

Storm wagged his tail as Quinn continued to scratch him behind his ears.

Jim said "My father has a very rigid idea of what a real man is. Chris always had a better time fitting that mold than me. As a result he openly favored Chris while treating me like shit. Chris was a varsity athlete while I was the brainy one. My lack of interest in sports as a kid caused Dad to completely turn on me. He was proud as punch when Chris went to Penn State on a full athletic scholarship while his response to me going to Bromwell on an academic scholarship was luke warm. When Chris decided to put his marketing degree to use and headed out to California the tables turned. Chris was on Dad's shit list after that for a while. Chris and I bonded over that. Dad forgave Chris when he became successful and married a model. When I chose you over a high prestige job the old man lost his shit. He thinks I threw away my future and he blames you."

Quinn put a hand on Jim's shoulder.

"Jim, I'm sorry."

"What for? You didn't do anything."

Quinn said "It's my fault your father treats you like shit."

Jim said "No, it isn't. He was always like that. He's just using you as an excuse to be like that."

Quinn asked "Was he always hitting you and abusing you emotionally?"

Jim nodded.

Quinn said "He actually reminds me of my grandfather, on my father's side. He died before I was born but Dad always rants about what an asshole he was. In my senior year of high school I had to do a biography of a war veteran. I picked my grandfather who was a veteran of both World War II and Korea. While doing research I discovered that he used to be a nice person but the experience of war turned him into the bastard my father was always ranting about."

Jim said "My father is an ex-Army Ranger. He won a shit ton of medals in Vietnam. He eventually became a member of Delta Force until he retired in '86. His forced retirement from the Army left him feeling bitter."

Quinn asked "Why was he forced to retire?"

Jim said "He was part of a team that oversaw the transfer of funds in the Iran/Contra scandal."

Quinn is visibly stunned.

Jim said "I didn't know about it until several years later. After that, Dad and one of his Delta teammates started their own private company, Blacksword Security Services. It became so successful that they even publish their own magazine, Brutal Mercenary."

Quinn remembered the name.

"Your father's business partner. Is his name Buck Conroy?"

"How'd you know?" asked Jim.

Quinn proceeded to tell him about the events in the Daria episode "This Year's Model".

* * *

**Lawndale, the next morning...**

At the Morgendorffer house, specifically the living room, Helen, Jake, Daria, Jane and Sandi were watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on TV.

Sandi said "Thanks for having me over, Mr. and Mrs. Morgendorffer."

"It's our pleasure, Sandi," Helen replied, "Sorry Quinn's not here, but she's spending Thanksgiving with Jim and his parents."

Sandi said "That's alright. I would've spent the holiday with Joey but since we've only been together for a few weeks I felt it was too soon."

Jake thoughtlessly added "There's also the fact that Mr. Vorchevsky booked you to perform at a bachelor party tomorrow night."

Sandi's eyes went wide and she gasped.

"Mr. Morgendorffer!"

Helen, Jane and Daria were all visibly shocked.

Jake said "She works as a dancer at Cafe Risque. What's the problem?"

Embarrassed, Sandi said "I wanted to keep that quiet."

Now, Jake was embarrassed. He meant no harm but it simply didn't occur to him that Sandi might not want people to know that she's a stripper.

* * *

**Act III**   
**Lawndale, Thanksgiving morning...**

At the Morgendorffer house Jake has just let it slip that Sandi now works as an exotic dancer. Everyone is shocked.

Jane said "You're a stripper!?"

Sandi hung her head in shame.

"Yes."

Helen asked "Why?"

"Because my mother cut me off and I was living in a homeless shelter. I had to take the first job I could get, which happened to be dancing at Cafe Risque. Without a college degree it was either that or something that doesn't pay a living wage."

Everyone looked sympathetic.

Sandi continued "I actually make pretty good money."

"No offense, Sandi" said Helen, "but that line of work caters to male chauvanism. You'll also be out of a job once your looks start to go."

Sandi said "I know. That's why I'm saving up so I can go back to college and get my associates degree. Then I can get a good paying job that doesn't require me to take my clothes off."

Daria said "At least you have a plan. I could never do something like that, but sometimes you have to play the hand your delt."

Sandi looked hopeful.

"You mean you don't think less of me because I'm a stripper?"

Jane said "Of course not. I mean, my brother's a chronically unemployed musician."

Sandi smiled.

* * *

**Meanwhile, in Virginia...**

At the Carbone house Jim, Tony, Vito and Chris were in the living room watching TV while Quinn, Gina, Brooke and Angela were in the kitchen. Gina and Quinn were fixing antipasto salad and tortollini soup for lunch while Angela and Brooke are working on the turkey. Brooke was not enjoying herself.

"Ewwww!!!" she said "You want me to actually take the birds guts out with my bare hands."

Quinn gave Brooke a sympathetic look.

Taking a last drag on her cigarette before stomping it out of the floor, Angela said "Thats how ya do it, Brooke. I'd do it but I'm f---in' old."

Angela got out another cigarette and lit it. Brooke reached for the turkey but hesitated.

Rolling her eyes, Angela said "California softie. Quinn, come here."

Quinn reluctantly walked toward Angela. Angela took a drag from her cigarette and exhaled. The smoke drifted toward Quinn, causing her to cough.

Angela said "Quinn, you gut the turkey. Brooke, you help Gina with the antipast'."

Brooke said "Thank God."

Quinn reached in to the turkey.

In the living room...

The guys continue to watch TV in the living room when coming from the kitchen they hear....

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!"

All four of the guys winced in pain at the sound of Quinn's voice.

Tony barked "Jim, tell your woman to shut the f--- up!"

Vito said "Aw, lay offa him, Tony."

Tony gave Vito a death glare.

Chris said "Dad, I think I'll help the girls."

Tony barked "No you won't! That's woman's work!" Tony then turned to his younger son. "Jim, you help the women since you act so much like one!"

"But, Dad..."

Tony raised the back of his hand.

"DO IT!"

Jim scampered to the kitchen.

* * *

**Lawndale, that evening...**

Helen, Jake, Daria, Jane and Sandi were eating Thanksgiving dinner and making light conversation.

"This is actually pretty good" said Sandi.

Jane said "Better than the food at my house when I was growing up."

Daria added "Cyanide is better than the food at your old house."

Sandi couldn't help but laugh.

"I know. I've got so many horror stories from my elementary school days."

Helen was intrigued.

"You've actually been to the Lanes house?"

"You don't know?" said Sandi, "In elementary school Jane and I were actually friends."

Helen asked "What happened?"

Sandi proceeded to explain.

"After I was held back in fifth grade my mother forced me to stop hanging out with Jane. By the time I was in middle school I'd fallen in with the elitest popular crowd. I wound up throwing Jane under the bus for the sake of popularity."

Now, Sandi looked sad.

"Fat lot of good it did me. My life sucks."

Jane sympathetically put a hand on Sandi's shoulder.

"It's alright, Sandi. I understand, we drifted apart."

Helen said "I still can't believe Linda disowned you for being bisexual."

Sandi said "I just can't get past it. I wasted the first 19 years of my life trying to be what my mother wanted me to be. I sometimes think back on what might have been if I hadn't been held back in fifth grade."

Jane said "I guess the dynamic duo of me and Daria would've been a trio. Maybe you could've even acknowledged your bisexuality sooner."

Sandi said "I doubt it. Even if I knew back then I would've kept it a closely guarded secret to avoid rumors. I probably shouldn't say this, but before Jane started dating that Tom guy there were rumors that you two were...well, you know...um..."

Jane said "...lesbian lovers."

Sandi was stunned.

"You knew!?"

Jane said "We knew."

Daria added "We just didn't care."

Sandi smiled warmly.

* * *

**Virginia...**

The Carbones and Quinn were having Thanksgiving dinner. Quinn smiled at Jim.

"Thanks for helping, honey."

Jim said "No problem."

Gina said "I really appreciate it, son."

Angela said "Jim's such a good boy."

Tony rolled his eyes.

"That's right, encourage him! I sometimes think I have a daughter instead of a son."

Jim stared daggers at his father.

Noticing this, Tony said "You got something on you mind, kid?"

Chris said "Now, Dad..."

Tony interrupted "Let your brother fight his own battles!"

Tony glared menacingly at Jim and his voice took on a very agressive tone.

"I axed you a question, Jim."

Jim finally found his courage.

"Dad, what's with the attitude? I know you're moody, but you've been like that in the extreme ever since Quinn and I showed up."

Tony said "You really wanna know? Awright, I'll tell ya. You had a good thing going at Grace, Sloan and Paige until you went and f---ed it all up for this red haired little c---. I thought you were finally gonna go somewheres I could be proud of, but nooooo, you had to be a bum."

Jim said "Sorry you feel that way, Dad, but I'd appreciate it if you don't call my girlfriend a c---."

Tony got up from his chair. He poured himself a glass of red wine. He then walked over to Quinn.

"Here, on me."

He poured the wine over Quinn's head, making her gasp in shock.

"Better yet, on you, you little t---! HA, HA, HA."

Jim immediately got in Tony's face.

"DAD, WHAT THE F---!?!"

Tony grabbed Jim by the shirt collar and backhanded him. He then yells right in Jim's face.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO BACKTALK ME, YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT!"

He mercilessly smacks Jim until Jim punches him. Tony staggers back before using his combat training to lock Jim into a choke hold.

"I OUTA BREAK YOUr NECK, YOU BASTARD!"

Gina yelled "TONY, NO!"

Chris said "Jeez, Dad! What the hell are you doing?"

"SHUT UP! I'M TRYING TO TEACH THE BOY A LESSON!"

At this point, Quinn gets over her initial shock and is ready to kill.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE, YOU PSYCHO BASTARD!!"

Quinn immediately leapt on Tony and started to hit him. Tony responded by releasing Jim and using his hands to throw Quinn to the floor, hard.

Tony shouted "F---ING LITTLE SLUT!!"

He kicked Quinn in the stomach. He was about to do it again when a now enraged Jim punched him in the face. The punch was so hard that Tony spun around and fell to the floor. Jim has just knocked his father unconscious. Next, Jim helped Quinn back up on her feet.

He asked "Are you okay?"

Quinn said "Yes, thanks."

Gina immediately walked up to the couple.

"Jim, I'm so sorry."

Jim said "It's okay, Mom. This isn't your fault. Still, I think it would be better if Quinn and I aren't here when Dad comes to."

Gina nodded in understanding. She and Jim hug.

"I'll call when we get home."

Next, Gina shakes Quinn's hand.

"It was nice to meet you, Quinn. I'm sorry my husband treated you so terribly."

"That's okay, Mrs. Carbone."

"Please, call me Gina."

Quinn smiled.

Jim said "Come on, Quinn. Let's get the dog and go home."

**A few minutes later...**

Quinn and Jim have just left when Tony regains consciousness.

"W-wha happen'd?"

Vito said "Jim knocked you out for hitting Quinn."

Tony felt both shocked and humiliated.

* * *

**Lawndale...**

Sandi was at the front door of the Morgendorffer's house. Daria and Jane were there to see her off.

Sandi said "Thanks for having me over."

Jane said "Don't mention it."

Daria added "Ever."

Sandi actually gets the joke and laughs.

"You know, Daria, you're not as weird as I thought."

"And you're not as shallow as I thought."

Sandi said "Well, bye."

She is about to leave when...

Jane said "Hey, wait up."

Sandi stopped and turned around. Jane handed her a piece of paper.

"What's this?" Sandi asked.

Jane said "Mine and Daria's address in Boston. If you ever wanna spend a few days in Massachusetts feel free to crash at our place. We can hang out and show you around."

Sandi was visibly touched.

"You mean it!?"

"Of course. We were friends once, maybe we can be again."

Daria added "We could always use a new convert to our flock of non conformity."

Sandi pulled both Daria and Jane into a group hug.

* * *

**I-64, on the combination bridge and underwater tunnel between Hampton and Norfolk...**  
 **Music:** "Tunnel of Love" by Bruce Springsteen

To make up for the debacle at his family's house Jim opted to take the scenic route back to Lawndale by taking I-64 into Norfolk then taking the Chesapeake Bay Bridge/Tunnel from Virginia Beach up through the Delmarva Peninsula into Maryland. Unfortunately, they were currently stuck in a traffic jam on the Hampton Roads Bridge/Tunnel connecting Hampton and Norfolk (That one's notorious for traffic tie-ups at every hour of day or night).

Jim said "Sorry about what happened."

Quinn said "That's okay. Your father's a real jerk but everybody else in your family was great. I especially like your mother. How did she ever wind up with a guy like him?"

"She was young and in love," Jim explained, "She stays with him because she's a good Catholic."

Quinn looked thoughtful.

"Jim, I was just thinking about what you told me yesterday afternoon. About your father saying that an imagination is useless. Nothing could be less true. Imagination is what lets us think outside the box and better ourselves and the world. Without it, we'd be nothing more than wild animals. I just want you to know that your father was wrong."

Jim smiled.

"If this Thanksgiving has taught me anything it's that Dad was wrong about a lot of things."

Quinn said "I guess you don't have much to be thankful for this year."

Jim said "I'm thankful for you."

Quinn smiled. She and Jim kiss. As if timed perfectly they break the kiss just as the traffic clears up. They enter the tunnel right as we hear..

_Into this tunnel of love..._

**End Episode.**


	6. Mama Drama

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quinn helps a friend through a personal crisis.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Mama Drama"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Outside Nicole's apartment building, evening...**

A red Ferrari 599 pulled up to the building. Inside the car Tom was in the driver's seat while Nicole was in the passenger seat. Tom was wearing a black leather jacket over T-shirt and jeans while Nicole was dolled up in a white V-neck that showed ample cleavage and black low-cut pants. She two was wearing a leather jacket and her hair and make up were immaculate. She and Tom had been dating since they met at his Halloween party a month earlier. In fact, Tom was dropping her off after a date that went really well.

"I had fun tonight" said Nicole.

"So did I" added Tom.

After this, they kissed. Tom then exited his high dollar sports car, made his way to the passenger side and opened the door for Nicole. He even helped her step out.

"Thanks, Tom."

The newly minted couple made their way to the front door of the building.

Nicole said "Thanks for the fun night out."

"No problem" said Tom.

They kissed again.

"Well, goodnight, Nicole."

Nicole smiled suggestively.

"Actually, Tom, would you like to come up?" asked Nicole, "We could hang out some more."

**Inside, a few minutes later...**

Tom and Nicole's jackets were on the floor while Tom and Nicole made out passionately. Tom slid a hand down and gave one of Nicole's ass cheeks a squeeze. This caused her to moan into his mouth.

"Mmmmm....hmph...HUMPH....MMMMM..."

They broke the kiss. Nicole frantically removed Tom's shirt. She sensuously ran her hands all over his chest as Tom removed Nicole's shirt. Continuing to make out furiously they undid each other's pants. Now stripped down to just their underwear Tom took in the sight of Nicole's lacy maroon bra and thong panties. He pulled Nicole close and they frantically kissed as Tom squeezed her bare ass cheeks. Nicole suddenly placed her hand on the growing bulge in Tom's boxer briefs and liked what she felt.

Smiling, Nicole cooed "You want me, don't you?"

Liking what she was doing to him, Tom groaned "Y...Yeah!"

"Take me," Nicole breathlessly whispered, "I want you!"

They proceeded to her bedroom, where they'd spend the rest of the night having sex until they were both spent.

**Two weeks later...**

A nervous Nicole stood in front of the bathroom sink holding a white strip that she'd just peed on while looking at her watch.

_Come onnnnnn! Think pink minus, think pink minus!_

When time was up, she looked at the strip. Her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped.

_No! By my ancestors, NO!_

There was a blue plus sign on the strip.

* * *

**Pizza King, later that day...**

Quinn was seated across the table from a visibly distraught Nicole.

"Nicole, what's wrong?" asked Quinn, "When you called and asked me to come to Pizza King it sounded urgent. Especially when you insisted I come alone."

"Q...Quinn," said Nicole, "Promise you won't tell anyone what I'm about to tell you."

"Nicole," said Quinn, "Of course I won't tell anyone."

Looking away, Nicole said "Quinn...It's like this, my period is normally like clockwork, has been since puberty, but not this time. I should've started three days ago. I...I was so rattled that this morning I went to Drugs 'n' Stuff and got a home pregnancy test. I...well..."

Quinn immediately put it together.

"Oh, Nicole."

Facing Quinn, Nicole took a deep breath to calm herself.

"Yes, I'm pregnant."

"How?" asked Quinn.

Nicole gave Quinn a 'really' type look, which Quinn noticed.

"I mean, I know how," said Quinn, "It's just that I thought you were on the pill."

"I am," said Nicole, "But Tom managed to knock me up anyway. I know it's rare, but the pill's only about 98% effective. Just my luck that my current batch fell into the other two percent."

Quinn said "That's why you should also use a condom. Granted, Jim and I don't always follow that one, but having two contraceptives is better than just one."

Nicole looked like she was about to cry.

"We didn't think to use a condom, okay!"

"Relax," said Quinn, "I'm not judging, I'm just a little shocked. I've heard pill failures can happen but this is the first time I've ever seen it." At this point, something occurred to Quinn. "Does Tom know?"

Nicole shook her head.

"You're the first one I've told, Quinn."

Quinn asked "What are you gonna do?"

Sighing, Nicole said "I don't know. I mean, I'm not even sure I should tell Tom."

Quinn replied "I think you should. After all, he's the father." Something else occurred to Quinn. "He is, right?"

Glaring menacingly, Nicole said "Yes, and I'm more than a little offended by the insinuation. Do you honestly think I'd cheat on someone given my own experiences with being two-timed?"

Realizing how she'd come off, Quinn said "Sorry. I...Well, I never really expected to be a situation like this. You know, best friend dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and all."

Calming down, Nicole said "And I never expected to be in this situation either. Don't get me wrong, Quinn, I'd like to have kids someday but I'm not ready for that now. I wanted to be a mom after getting married and settling down, not pregnant by a guy I've only been seeing for a little over a month. I...I don't know what to do."

"The first thing," said Quinn, "You need to tell Tom. He should know that you're carrying his child."

"What then?" asked Nicole, "Do I have this baby, even though I'm not ready to take on that kind of a responsibility?"

Quinn said "You and Tom need to decide that. In a way, this could be a test of the relationship's true potential. If he bails on you know then at least you'll know he's not worth a second thought. What do you wanna do, Nicole?"

Nicole sighed.

"I don't wanna have the baby, I'm not ready for motherhood right now. I know, I can have an abortion. It's just...well..."

Quinn asked "Are you against that? Don't get me wrong, I'm pro-choice, but if you have moral issues with abortion I understand."

"I'm pro-choice, too," said Nicole, "It's just that the choice is harder than I thought it would be."

Quinn said nothing but sat there looking thoughtful.

* * *

**Offices of Morgendorffer And Daughter Consulting, later...**

Quinn sat at her desk lost in thought.

_Poor Nicole. She doesn't know what to do. Granted, I'm waiting until marriage to have kids but I'd like to think that if Jim got me pregnant we'd both do the right thing. Still, we've been together for a year and a half and share an apartment while Nicole and Tom haven't even been together two months._

Quinn's train of thought was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Come in."

Her cousin/assistant, Erin, entered with a concerned look on her face.

"Quinn, what's wrong?"

Quinn sighed.

"What make's you think something's wrong?"

Taking a seat, Erin said "Quinn, you got a call on your personal line. After this you tell me to clear your schedule and take off without explanation. When you come back you're like a zombie. I'm just a little concerned, that's all."

"Erin, if you don't mind," said Quinn, "I can't really talk about it."

Erin accepted this. She was about to get up from her seat when...

"Erin, how did you react when you found out you had herpes?"

Erin raised an eyebrow.

"Why do you ask?"

Quinn took a deep breath.

"Let's just say someone I know is in a similar situation."

Erin asked "Did Jim give you something?"

Stifling a giggle, Quinn said "No, we're both disease free. We got tested before forgoing the rubbers."

With a regretful sigh, Erin said "Wish I'd done that with Brian. Maybe I wouldn't have wasted a decade of my life with that shiftless bastard."

Quinn said "Look, without betraying anyone's trust, let's just say I know someone who recently found out something that could alter the course of her life and she doesn't know what to do."

"I wish I had some advice to give," said Erin, "But you know my story doesn't have a happy ending."

"I know," said Quinn, "It's just...well, you know how I feel responsible for the people I care about."

Erin nodded.

"The fact that you gave me a job and helped me find a new home after my divorce is testament to that." After a moment, Erin added "Look, the best advice I can give is to just be there when this person needs you, just like you've always been."

Quinn was somewhat relieved.

* * *

**Tom's house, evening...**

Tom and Nicole were sitting on the couch in the living room.

"Nicole," said Tom, "What's wrong?"

"Tom," Nicole said, "I...I need to tell you something."

"Okay."

Nicole asked "How do you feel...about me?"

"I like you," said Tom, "You're smart, down to earth, you live life on your own terms. Why?"

"Tom," said Nicole, "I...I'm pregnant."

Tom's jaw dropped.

"Nicole....what!?"

"I'm pregnant and you're the father."

Tom looked like he'd just been hit with a 2x4.

"H...How?"

Nicole rolled her eyes.

"You put your pole in my hole and thrusted until sticky white stuff came out."

Trying not to laugh, Tom said "That's not what I meant. I thought you were on the pill."

"I was," said Nicole, "But it turns out that I'm pregnant anyway."

"I...see."

A long, awkward silence followed. Finally...

"Tom," said Nicole, "Please say something."

Tom asked "What are you gonna do?"

Nicole was a little put off.

"Don't you mean what are WE gonna do?"

Nervous, Tom said "Um...Yeah, of course."

"Well," asked Nicole, "What do you think we should do?"

Tom thought for a second.

"We have three options. One, we have this baby and try to make it work. Two, we give the child up for adoption. Three, you get an abortion."

Nicole said "Tom, we've only been together for a month and a half and I'm not ready to be a parent. I guess we could put the child up for adoption but that's gonna be hard for me once the maternal instincts start to kick in. I'll spend the rest of my life wondering how our child is doing while being tormented by the guilt I'd feel for abandoning my own baby. That pretty much leaves abortion. What do you think?"

Tom said "Well, the easiest solution would be an abortion, can't fault your logic on that one."

The relief in Tom's voice made it clear that he was leaning toward abortion.

"You sure?" Nicole asked.

Tom said "Whatever you decide I'll go along with."

It sounded so rehearsed that Nicole was now doubting the relationship.

* * *

**A street in Lawndale, a few days later...**

Quinn was driving her Impala while Nicole rode shotgun.

"Thanks for doing this, Quinn" said Nicole.

Quinn said "No problem. Are you sure you wanna do this?"

Nicole said "Yes. Tom's definitely wants me to do this, though to his credit he did try not to let on. I can't fault the logic either. Neither of us is ready for parenthood and I don't think giving my baby up for adoption is something I can live with."

"You know," said Quinn, "I do find it a little off putting that Tom didn't come with us."

Nicole said "He has to work."

"Still," said Quinn, "He's the father. The fact that he's letting you do this without him is pretty telling, don't you think?"

Nicole sat there looking thoughtful.

They pulled into the parking lot of the clinic and were dismayed to find the place mobbed with protesters.

"Oh, no!" said Quinn.

"Let's just do this," Nicole pleaded, "The sooner it's done the sooner I can put this nightmare behind me."

Quinn and Nicole exited the car. As they made their way to the clinic the protesters started in on them.

"You're gonna burn in Hell, you child murderers!" one guy said.

A woman got in their faces and shouted "YOU SLUTS SHOULD'VE KEPT YOUR LEGS SHUT!"

This was followed by another guy pointing at them as he shouted "WHORES!"

A woman did the same. "JEZEBELS!!"

"IMMORAL STRUMPETS!!!!" shouted another guy in the crowd.

As the taunts continued Nicole was struggling to keep it together while Quinn stared daggers at the crowd. Just then, a man tried to block their path while waving a bible in their faces.

"REPENT, FORNICATERS!!!"

Quinn shoved him.

"BACK OFF, JESUS FREAK!!!"

Another bible thumper got in Nicole's face.

"REPENT! WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO DO IS AN AFFRONT TO THE LORD!!"

At the same time, another protester shouted "LIFE BEGINS AT CONCEPTION! YOU'VE NO RIGHT TO COMMIT INFANTICIDE!!!"

Nicole finally broke down. She fell to her knees and started crying. The protesters encircled them.

"ABORTION IS MURDER!"

"THE FETUS FEELS PAIN!"

Quinn now channeled her inner Helen.

"BACK THE FUCK OFF!!!!"

Stunned, everyone took a step back.

"WE'RE TRYING TO SAVE A LIFE!" one of the protesters shouted.

Quinn shouted back "AND I'M TRYING TO PROTECT MY FRIEND!"

Another protester yelled "YOUR FRIEND IS A MURDERER AND A WHORE!!!"

Quinn menacingly narrowed her eyes. With deadly calm in her voice, she said "The next guy who give us shit loses a testicle and the next girl who does the same will need DNA to ID her remains...GOT IT!!!!"

She wasn't bluffing, and they knew it. The crowd backed off.

Turning to her crying friend, Quinn said "Come on, Nicole."

Nicole shouted "NO!"

Now it was Quinn's turn to be stunned.

Nicole said "I...I... _sniff_...I... _choke_...I can't... _sob_...I can't do this! Q _...sniffle_...Quinn...I...I JUST WANNA GO HOME!!!"

* * *

**Act II**   
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, day...**

Quinn sat on the couch between Jim and Nicole. Jim knew what was going on because when Nicole asked Quinn to come with her to the clinic for moral support she'd given the latter permission to tell him. They were talking about what happened.

"I...I just couldn't do it" Nicole explained.

Quinn said "I can't believe those jerks!"

"I'm not surprised," said Jim, "Abortion's been a hot button issue ever since it was legalized. The anti-abortion crowd claims it's about saving lives, and I think some of them do genuinely believe that, but it's really about putting women in their place because they feel threatened by gender equality."

Over her crying fit, Nicole said "I have to admit some of them had a point. Tom and I should've been more careful."

"Nicole," said Quinn, "You were on the pill. All you could've done differently is not have sex with Tom."

"Or used a condom" Jim thoughtlessly added.

Both women stared daggers at him.

"Not helping" Quinn growled.

Realizing he'd just put his foot in his mouth, Jim said "Sorry".

At this point the dog, Storm, nuddged Quinn for some attention.

Petting Storm, Quinn said "Yes, Storm, Daddy's being an idiot."

"That doesn't help either" Nicole hissed.

Quinn blushed with embarrassment.

"Sorry."

Getting back to the matter at hand, Nicole said "What am I gonna do? I'm not ready to be a mom but I just can't face those assholes at the clinic again."

"That's something you need to discuss with Tom" said Jim.

Quinn nodded in agreement.

"True. This is just as much his problem as it is yours."

Jim added "I know him pretty well. Aside from being friends with him in college I also worked with him for two years. He's not the type to shirk responsibility. I'm not saying you need to get married or anything like that. Trust me, a marriage under these circumstances is either doomed to fail or it's going to be a firestorm of family dysfunction, which I know from experience can damage a kid even worse than growing up with one parent out of the picture."

Deciding not to ask Jim what he meant, Nicole just sighed.

"I guess Tom and I need to talk."

* * *

**Tom's house, the next day...**

Tom and Nicole were sitting on the couch. Nicole was explaining to him why she didn't have the abortion.

"...and I just couldn't go through with it. So now we need to decide what to do since I'm having this baby despite my misgivings."

Tom's reaction surprised her.

"I'm actually glad you didn't go through with it."

Nicole gasped as her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped.

"But...you seemed so in favor of an abortion the last time we talked!"

Tom said "Well, that was before I had time to really think about this."

Nicole eyed Tom with curiosity.

"But...I thought you'd bail on me if I didn't get an abortion. I mean, you didn't come with me to the clinic. I had to rely on Quinn for moral support there."

"Nicole," Tom admitted, "I didn't want to come because I was still in shock and wasn't thinking straight. Truth be told, this is entirely my fault. I should've said no to sex when I realized neither of us had condoms."

Nicole said "Tom, by that point we were both naked and so turned on that I was practically begging you to stick it in. Besides, we're both disease free and I was on the pill. There was no reason to think there'd be any problems."

"Still doesn't change the fact that you're carrying my child," said Tom, "While I'd wanted an abortion at first I took some time to really think things through. Nicole, I'm heir to one of the biggest fortunes in America and my father's grooming me to suceed him as head of one of the biggest brokerage firms in the country."

Nicole became angry.

"You'd better not be suggesting that I'm keeping this baby because I'm after your family's money!"

Tom threw up his hands in mock surrender.

"No, I'm not saying that at all." After taking a breath, he continued. "What I'm saying is that the child, as it stands now, will never want for anything. That is, our son or daughter will never want for ALMOST anything."

Nicole asked "What do you mean 'almost'?"

Tom said "I mean the baby would be provided for financially, I'll see to that, but he or she would lack the most important thing."

Nicole raised an eyebrow.

"Which is?"

Tom said "A stable home with two loving parents."

"Relax," said Nicole, "I'll make sure you're involved in the childs life somehow."

"Nicole," said Tom, "You're an amazing woman. Even if you weren't carrying my child you're still a smart, beautiful, passionate woman who isn't afraid to be herself."

At this point, Tom reached into his pocket, pulled out a small jewelry box and opened it. Nicole gasped when she saw the 24 karat Cartier diamond ring.

"Nicole Yagami," said Tom, "Will you marry me?"

Nicole was stunned speechless.

* * *

**Pizza King, the next day...**  
 **Music:** "Gold Digger" by Kanye West

_Now, I ain't sayin' she a gold digger_   
_But she ain't messin' with no broke n-----_

Quinn and Nicole were talking over pizza. Quinn noted that Nicole seemed to be in a very good mood.

"So, Nicole," asked Quinn, "Have you talked with Tom?"

Nicole, with a huge smile on her face, said "Yes."

Quinn asked "How'd that go?"

Nicole's smile widened as she said "Why don't I show you?"

Nicole held her hand in front of Quinn and showed her the ring. Quinn gasped in shock.

"Nicole, is that....!?"

"Yep," said Nicole, "I'm engaged!"

Quinn didn't know whether to congradulate her friend or smack some sense into her.

"Tom asked me to marry him," said Nicole, "And his reasons made so much sense."

Quinn stood up.

"Nicole, ladies room....NOW!"

**The ladies restroom, a few moments later...**

Now that they have some privacy Quinn is letting Nicole have it.

"Are you out of your freakin' mind!?!"

Nicole was shocked.

"Quinn...I thought you'd be happy for me."

"Happy!?!" exclaimed Quinn, "I'm surprised I'm not trying to beat some sense into you! Have you completely lost your damn mind!?"

"Quinn," said Nicole, "I'm pregnant with his baby."

"Nicole," Quinn fired back, "You've only been with him a month and a half."

Nicole refused to see the light of reason.

"Quinn, you're living with your boyfriend."

"Totally different situation," said Quinn, "Jim and I had already been together a whole year when he moved in with me. Yes, it's worked out great so far, but it was kind of forced on us by circumstance. I took Jim in because he had nowhere else to go after coming back from Japan."

Nicole countered with "My decision to marry Tom is a product of circumstance as well. I'm pregnant with his baby. Besides, you and Jim are living together. That's the same thing."

"No, it isn't," said Quinn, "Jim and I aren't contractually obliged to make it work. If it doesn't then one of us can just pack up and move. If it doesn't work with you and Tom, and I can tell you right now that it won't, ending a marriage is waaaaaaayyyyyyy more complicated than ending a less formal arraingement."

"Quinn," said Nicole, "It's my life and MY child. If I want to spend it with the baby's father you can't tell me no."

Quinn said "The hell I can't, Nicole. I can't stop you, but I can try to get you to change your mind."

"Why?" asked Nicole, "Quinn, you're my best friend. More than that, you're like the sister I never had. Why can't you be supportive."

"Dammit, Nicole," Quinn barked, "I AM supportive! That's why we're having this conversation. I'm trying to talk you out of doing something you'll regret for the rest of your life."

"What I'll regret," Nicole said, "Is having a child out of wedlock. I can't do that."

"Why not?" asked Quinn.

Nicole explained "Quinn, my family's Japanese."

"So?"

"So," Nicole went on, "Japanese culture is NOT very accepting of unwed mothers. I have this child out of wedlock my parents will disown me out of shame."

Quinn said "We both know that's not true. Your parents grew up in this country and are pretty well Americanized. I've met them and know that they won't disown you over this. Yes, their first reaction will be to read you the riot act, but they'll come around once the shock wears off."

Nicole said "Quinn, I can't raise a child by myself."

"And you won't," said Quinn, "Even if Tom drops the ball you still have me, Jim, Stacy, Chuck and all our other friends. We'll gladly help you out."

Nicole said "Look, Quinn, I appreciate what you're trying to do here but it's my decision."

Nicole left without another word.

* * *

**Offices of Morgendorffer And Daughter Consulting, later...**

Quinn was angrily pacing around the office while Erin sat at her desk listening to her cousin/boss vent.

"I can't freaking believe Nicole!" Quinn fumed, "Marrying a guy just because he got her pregnant. I don't get that."

Erin said "I do."

Quinn's eyes went wide.

"WHAT!?!"

"Don't get me wrong," said Erin, "I think Nicole's making a huge mistake but I understand why she's doing this. After all, I married an alcoholic asshole because he gave me herpes."

"And tossed his drunk ass to the curb" Quinn reminded.

"After eight years of constant physical and emotional abuse," said Erin, "It took you getting involved for me to finally find the strength to leave Brian."

Calming down, Quinn said "Still, you know what a huge mistake Nicole's making."

"And I understand why she's making it," said Erin, "She's afraid no one else will want her if she has a kid already."

Quinn thought about this for a minute.

"That actually makes sense," she admitted, "Not many guys are willing to take on that kind of responsibility."

"Exactly," said Erin, "Nicole's trying to make the best of a hopeless situation."

Quinn said nothing but stood there looking thoughtful.

* * *

**Winged Tree Country Club, evening...**

Tom and Nicole were having dinner. Ironically, they were sitting at the same table where he sat with Daria when she first met his family.

"You know," said Nicole, "We could've done this at your parent's house."

"I know," said Tom, "But I figure telling them in a public..." He amended the statement. "...well, semi-public actually, place will be less likely to create a scene."

"I see," said Nicole, "I guess they are gonna be a little shocked when they learn we're already having a kid."

"Um...yeah," said Tom with a guilty expression on his face, "That...That's exactly why I wanted to do this in a place with other people around."

Sensing Tom's unease, Nicole said "Relax, Tom. I won't do anything to embarrass you."

Tom didn't dare tell her that it was his family he was afraid of being embarrassed by. It was at this point that Kay and Angier approached.

"Tom," said Kay, "How are you?"

"Hi, Mom" said Tom.

Angier cast a brief look at Nicole before saying to Tom "Don't you think this is inappropriate? Nicole might get the wrong idea if she see's you flirting with the help."

Nicole took a deep breath to calm herself as it was abvious that Tom's father had assumed she's staff solely because she's not white. Both Kay and Angier took their seats.

"So, Tom," said Kay, "When do we get to meet this Nicole?"

Added Angier "Your mother and I can hardly wait to meet our soon-to-be daughter in law."

Putting an arm around Nicole, Tom said "Mom, Dad, I'd like to introduce my fiance, Nicole Yagami."

Angier and Kay both gasped in shock. Nicole sank in her chair as she immediately understood what the problem was: she's asian.

* * *

**Act III**   
**Winged Tree Country Club, evening...**

Tom Sloane has just introduced his fiance, Nicole Yagami, to his parents. It's readily apparent that they do not approve of their son marrying an asian woman, making this VERY awkward.

"Um...Well," said a nervous Kay, "Um...Nicole. It's nice to meet you."

They shook hands even though Kay's politeness is obviously forced.

Angier said "Thomas Jefferson Cornelius Vanderbilt Sloane, what is the meaning of this?"

Tom patiently explained "Dad, I know this is a shock, but we're getting married."

"Why?" asked an equally stunned Kay.

Nicole said "Because...well...um...I'm pregnant. We're already having a baby."

Kay's eyes went wide.

"Oh, my!"

Angier scowled.

"So, you tried to climb the social ladder by seducing my son into impregnating you, is that it!?"

Nicole was now too shocked to speak. Tom just looked away and didn't even try to defend her.

Kay nervously tried to explain.

"Well...Tom...You see...um..."

Words escape her.

"We expected you to marry one of our kind" said Angier.

Nicole became angry.

"Excuse me! What do you mean 'our kind'?"

Angier said "Listen, Miss...What's your last name again?"

"Yagami" Nicole practically hissed.

Kay said "Listen, I'm sure you're a nice person but..."

"But what!?" Nicole interrupted in a confrontational tone.

"See," said Angier, "It's like this. You're asian while we're white. Our family's been in this country since colonial times. What about your's?"

Nicole, trying not to go off, said "My mother's side immigrated from Japan in the early 20th century. My father's parents came here as refugees immediately after World War II, also from Japan."

Angier took a deep breath before explaining.

"Listen, Yagami, it's nothing against you personally but our family has a reputation to uphold. The fact is that a man of Thomas' breeding is expected to marry a white woman from a good family. Someone like you is not the kind who'd fit in in our world."

Staring daggers, Nicole accused "By 'someone like me' you mean a Jap, don't you?"

Kay looked away out of embarrassment.

Angier explained "Someone like you is not marriage material. You're more the type a man like young Thomas uses to sow his wild oates before settling down."

Nicole's expression quickly went from angry to hurt. _Tom's not even trying to defend me_ she thought as she watched him just sit there while his parents all but call her a slut. _It's what happened with Keith in high school all over again. I'm just some exotic piece of ass to fuck until June Cleaver comes along._

Nicole suddenly got up from her seat and ran off crying.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, later...**

Quinn, Nicole and Jim were sitting on the couch. While Jim pets Storm Quinn tries to comfort a very upset Nicole.

"Nicole, I'm so sorry."

"I can't believe this," said Nicole, "Just because I'm not some pasty old money white chick."

Jim said "Nicole, even without the racism have you considered the possibility that marrying Tom's not the best thing for you or the baby?"

Nicole said "Quinn and I had this conversation earlier and I'm beginning to see her point." Turning to Quinn, she added "By the way, sorry I kind of blew up at you before."

"That's okay," said Quinn, "I get it. You're in a bad situation and feel like there's no way out."

"This sucks!" said Nicole, "I'm pregnant but not ready to be a mom. The father comes from a family of stuck up racists who think I'm trash just because I have yellow skin and slanted eyes. I...I don't know what to do!"

Nicole was about to start crying when Jim spoke up.

"I should tell you ladies a story."

Nicole and Quinn both looked at Jim.

Jim said "Back in 1942 there were a pair of high school sweethearts in New York. The guy got the girl pregnant just before graduation. They got married simply because social norms at the time dictated that's what you do. After the honeymoon he went off to fight in the war while she had the baby. Unfortunately, this girl wanted to go to Hollywood and be an actress but she couldn't do that now and took her frustration out on the baby. After the war the couple settled into married life but always treated the baby like shit, blaming all of their problems on him. Eventually, they had other children who they loved and cared for but always treated their first born like trash and went out of their way to make their eldest son feel like an abomination. On the boys 18th birthday he ran away and joined the Army just to escape the abuse. He went on to serve multiple combat tours in Vietnam and fight in many dirty wars after that, first as a soldier and later as a mercenary. All of his wartime experiences and the traumatic childhood turned him into a toxic psychopath. The couple who had this baby were Jack and Angela Carbone and the boy's name was Tony Carbone, my father."

Nicole was stunned.

"Your father!"

Jim nodded.

Quinn said "I've met him. Truth is, this story explains a lot. Jim's father really is a total psycho, and this explains why he's like that."

Nicole suddenly looked like she wanted to throw up.

"Nicole," said Jim, "You alright? I only mentioned all of that to illustrate why marriage might not be a good idea. My grandparents married under similar circumstances and my father grew up to be a brutal mercenary as a result."

Nicole suddenly looked sick.

"I...I...I need to use the bathroom!"

Nicole immediately ran to the bathroom and practically slammed the door behind her. Quinn and Jim heard the sound of pants being unzipped in a frantic hurry, then...

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Concerned, both Quinn and Jim ran to the bathroom and opened the door which, in her haste, Nicole didn't lock.

Nicole stood there with a frightened expression on her face. Both Jim and Quinn were equally frightened when they saw what was happening to Nicole below the waist.

"I...I NEED TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL!" Nicole shouted in a panic.

* * *

**Cedars Of Lawndale, later...**

Nicole was sitting in an emergency room bed wearing a hospital gurney and looking totally frightened. An equally frightened Quinn was standing right beside her.

"It'll be okay, Nicole."

"Okay!" said a totally distraught Nicole, "OKAY! Quinn, I'm pregnant and bleeding out my pussy. How can it possibly be okay!?!"

At this point the doctor, a handsome man in his thirties, entered.

Quinn said "What's going on? Is my friend alright!?"

The doctor said "Miss Yagami is just fine."

"WHAT!?!" Nicole exclaimed, "If I'm fine then why am I bleeding down there!?"

The doctor said "You're having your period."

Both Quinn and Nicole were stunned by this bombshell. They said the following in unison.

"WHAT!?!"

The doctor was a little freaked by the reaction.

Calming down, Quinn said "She's pregnant, how can she be having her period!?"

"Actually," said the doctor, "I've seen this before. Miss Yagami, have you recently gone on a new form of birth control."

Nodding, Nicole said "Last month my gynecologist changed my birth control from progestin to prventagen*."

*(Author's note: there's no such thing as prventagen, I totally made that one up.)

"That explains it," said the doctor, "Prventagen was recently recalled because it's side effects include delayed periods and false positives on home pregnancy tests."

"So..." said Nicole, "You're saying...?"

The doctor nodded.

"You're not pregnant, you never were."

Nicole and Quinn both breathed huge sighs of relief.

* * *

**Tom's house, the next day...**

Tom and Nicole were sitting in the living room. Nicole has just told him the good news.

"So," said Tom, "You're telling me it was a false alarm."

"Yep," said Nicole, "I'm not pregnant after all."

Tom let out a huge sigh of relief.

"Thank God!"

Nicole just rolled her eyes.

Tom said "Um, Nicole, since we're not about to become parents...well..."

Nicole took the ring off and handed it back to Tom.

"I don't wanna get married now either."

Taking back the ring, Tom said "Thanks. Don't get me wrong, I really like you, but I'm not ready to get married. By the way, sorry about my parents."

"You know," said Nicole, "you could've at least tried to stick up for me when they went all KKK."

"Sorry," said Tom, "Give them time, they'll come around."

Nicole sighed.

"Actually, Tom," she paused for a moment, "I think we should break up."

Tom's eyes went wide.

"What!?! Why?"

Nicole said "Because it's pretty obvious we'd never work. Your parents don't like me because I'm asian, you give off this self-entitled vibe and frankly, you suck at making huge life decisions."

"I...I guess," Tom finally admitted.

Nicole put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Relax, Tom, I still like you. We always have fun when we go out and you're great in the sack. Unfortunately, that seems to be all we have going for us. To be honest fun dates and hot sex only go so far in a relationship. I really think we're better off just being friends. If there's one thing I've learned in all of this it's that we just aren't compatible enough to be more than that."

Tom took a moment to think about it.

"I can't really say I disagree. I guess we just aren't really right for each other."

Nicole said "Relax. I imagine we'll both get over this pretty quickly." She extended her hand. "Friends?"

Tom shook her hand.

"Of course."

* * *

**Pizza King, evening...**

Nicole was having pizza with Quinn and Jim.

"So," said Jim, "You and Tom are officially done?"

Nicole nodded.

"It was nice while it lasted, but I've come to realize that Tom and I are totally not right for each other."

Stifling a giggle, Quinn said "You know, Jane and my sister probably could've told you that without all the drama." Knowing from experience how painful break ups can be, Quinn added "You're taking this surprisingly well."

Nicole said "That's because Tom and I were only together for a month and a half. It's not like you and Trevor, breaking up after four years and a lot of memories."

"I guess" said Quinn.

Added Jim "It probably helps that you're relieved to find out you're not pregnant after all."

"It does," said Nicole, "I'd like to have kids someday, but there's a lot more living I wanna do first."

Raising her soda, Quinn said "I'll drink to that."

The three friends clinked their soda cups together in a toast.

**End Episode.**


	7. Obsession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeffy's back, but is he over his crush on Quinn?

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Obssession"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

It's an overcast Friday afternoon in Lawndale and Quinn was in her car driving home from work. She has just one thought:

_I can't believe some of those clients. Who in their right mind thinks edible tobacco is a marketable idea?_

She doesn't see the rusted, jagged piece of metal in the middle of the road. She does, however, hear the clang as she runs over it. This is followed by a loud popping sound. Right after that the right front side of her car sinks and she can barely steer. She immediately pulls over and turns on her hazard lights. She gets out and walks over to the right front of her car and finds that the tire is now completely shredded.

"Dammit!"

Just then, white flakes started to fall from the sky. Now, Quinn was pissed.

"Snow! I have to change a tire in a SNOWSTORM!! GAHHHH, DAMMIT!!!"

She was snapped out of her Jake like meltdown by a familiar voice behind her on the sidewalk.

"Quinn!? Quinn Morgendorffer, is that you!?"

Quinn turned around and was shocked to see...Jeffy. Yes, that Jeffy. One of her three most devoted suitors from high school. Jeffy looked the same as when she last saw him the summer after graduation, more than five years before.

"Ohmygod! Jeffy, is that really you?"

Jeffy smiled.

Quinn asked "What are you doing here?"

Jeffy said "I was taking a walk, enjoying the cool December air when I heard your car blow a tire. I ran over to help and was surprised to find you. How have you been?"

"Right now I could be better. My tire blew out and now it's snowing."

Jeffy pointed out that they're right by Pizza King.

"Tell you what, Quinn. Why don't we wait out the storm in there? My treat. We can catch up and when it stops snowing I'll change your tire for you."

Quinn said "Jeffy, that's so sweet. Sure. Why not?"

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Later, inside Pizza King...**  
 **Music:** "Candyman" by Christina Aguilera

Quinn and Jeffy were having Pizza and talking. Jeffy was having a slice of six topping deluxe while Quinn was having her usual veggie pizza.

Jeffy said "During my first semester at State U I discovered I had a knack for photography. So I decided to major in photojournalism. After I graduated I became a news photographer for the Herald and moved back to Lawndale."

Quinn said "That's cool. Without football you discovered that you had other talents. Stacy and I did the same thing after the Fashion Club broke up."

"How is she, by the way?"

"She married Cahrles Ruttheimer last spring. She's a field reporter for WSBC now."

Jeffy was visibly shocked.

"She married Upchuck!?!"

Quinn said "He dropped that whole persona after he graduated. He only goes by Chuck now. You'd be surprised. Once he stopped being Upchuck it turned out he was actually a really sweet guy. Stacy noticed this before anyone else did and they just hit it off from there."

Jeffy asked "So, what about you? What have you been up to since high school?"

Quinn said "I majored in marketing at Boston State. Right after I graduated my father had another heart attack so I moved back to Lawndale to run his consulting business for him while he recovered. I did so well that when he came back he made me his business partner. Morgendorffer Consulting is now Morgendorffer and Daughter Consulting."

Jeffy had a thought.

"Say, Quinn, I was wondering if maybe we could go out sometime. Like on a real date. You interested?"

Quinn said "Sorry, Jeffy, but I already have a boyfriend. A serious boyfriend. As in we live together serious."

Jeffy looked a little deflated. He only looks like that for a second, however, before he shrugs it off and smiles.

"Oh, well. Can't blame a guy for trying."

They both laugh.

Jeffy asked "So, who's the lucky guy? It's not Joey or Jamie, is it?"

Quinn laughed.

"No. In fact, I haven't seen Jamie since he went to college. Last I heard he dropped out and joined the Army. And Joey is going out with Sandi."

Jeffy said "Sandi Griffin!? How did that happen?"

Quinn said "He and Sandi ran into each other almost two months ago. Then, at a Halloween party they sort of hooked up. They've been a steady couple since then. They're really into each other."

Jeffy asked "So, what about your guy?"

Quinn said "His name is Jim, Jim Carbone. He works as an auto mechanic."

Jeffy said "I always figured you'd go for someone who made more bank than that."

"Well, people change. Even you've changed in the last five years."

"Touche."

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **At Quinn and Jim's apartment that evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having dinner and Quinn was telling him about her day.

"...so after it stopped snowing he changed my tire and I was on my way. It was nice to catch up with a familiar face again."

Jim said "So you now have three J's in your life again: me, Joey and Jeffy."

Quinn laughed.

"True, but this time I'm not stringing along all three of you just because I like the attention. Joey's with Sandi, I'm with you and Jeffy is just an old acquaintence."

Jim said "That's cool. I don't wanna share you with two other guys. I like our monogamous relationship."

"So do I. I'm pleasantly surprised that you aren't jealous."

"Why would I be?" asked Jim, "You told me that you only liked them as friends. Also, he backed off when you told him you were in a serious relationship. I know you wouldn't have told me all of this if there was something to hide."

Just then, Quinn felt something brush her leg. She looked down and saw Storm looking at her with pleading eyes. The dog's begging again.

Quinn said "Storm, this is people food and I already fed you."

Not ready to give up just yet, Storm plays up the sad act by whimpering. Quinn's will erodes.

"Alright, but just one and that's it."

She gave him a piece of bread, which he gobbled up in an instant. Jim grinned when he saw this.

"That dog has you completely wrapped around his finger. Talk about role reversal."

Quinn giggled and Storm happily wagged his tail.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **The next day at Lawndale Mall...**

Quinn, Nicole, Stacy and Sandi were doing Christmas shopping. Tiffany wasn't with them.

Quinn said "It's a shame Tiffany couldn't get off work today."

Stacy said "I know. It just isn't the same without her. Maybe we should stop by Cashmans and pay her a visit."

Sandi said "With how crowded this mall is I doubt she'll have time to talk to us."

"What would we say anyway?" asked Nicole, "I mean besides stuff that confuses the hell out of her."

Just then...

"Hey, Quinn."

All four girls turned around. It's Jeffy.

Quinn said "Hi, Jeffy."

Jeffy asked "How'd the spare tire hold up? Did you get home alright?"

The other three girls looked at Quinn questioningly.

Quinn explained "My car blew a tire yesterday. Jeffy happend to be there and we got caught up before he changed the tire for me."

Jeffy turned his attention to Sandi.

"So, I hear you're going out with Joey now."

Sandi said "Yes. We're doing great."

Jeffy said "That's nice. I'd actually like to get back in touch with him. You know, reminisce about the good old days. Why don't you two have dinner at my place?"

Sandi said "That sounds nice. I'll ask Joey and see what he says."

Jeffy said "Great. Here, let me give you my number."

Jeffy wrote his phone number down on a piece of paper and gave it to Sandi. After this, he turned his attention back to Quinn.

"So, how are things with you and this Jim guy?"

Quinn said "They're great. He told me to thank you for helping me yesterday."

Jeffy asked "Where is he now?"

Quinn said "He took my car to Rowe's garage to get a new tire using his employee discount."

Jeffy said "That's cool. I'd actually like to meet him. Can I have your number."

Quinn seemed a little uncertain. They haven't seen each other in five years and he wants to exchange contact info. Quinn shrugs.

"Sure, why not?"

She gave Jeffy her phone number and Jeffy gave her his.

Stacy said "It's nice to see you again, Jeffy."

"Nice to see you again, too. So, Quinn, can I help you carry your shopping bags."

Quinn said "That's alright, Jeffy. I'm just fine on my own."

"You sure?"

Quinn looked a little weirded out, which Jeffy noticed.

"Just trying to be nice."

"I know," said Quinn, "It just seems weird, like nothing's changed since high school."

Jeffy said "Can I at least help you girls shop? Maybe I can help you find something."

Sandi said "Um, Jeffy, no offense but this is kind of a girls afternoon out. That's why Stacy didn't bring her husband while Quinn and I didn't bring our boyfriends."

Jeffy seemd a little put off but let it slide.

"It's cool. Maybe I'll see you around, Quinn."

Quinn smiled sweetly.

"Bye, Jeffy."

With that, Jeffy left. As he walked away both Stacy and Nicole eye him suspiciously.

Stacy said "Quinn, don't you think it's a little weird that he ran into you today after you had a chance encounter with him yesterday?"

Quinn said "No. I mean, we run into people we used to know all the time."

Nicole said "You know, Quinn, it's kinda weird that he didn't even notice me. You'd think a guy who knew you all back in high school would be a little curious that the group includes someone he's never seen before."

"Good point" Stacy agreed. Turning to Sandi, she asked "Sandi, do you think he's a stalker?"

Sandi rolled her eyes.

"Stacy, why are you asking me?"

"Well, you were right about the bellboy at Le Grande."

Nicole looked questioningly at Quinn.

"Long, embarrassing story" said Quinn. She then turned to Stacy. "Stacy, Bobby was a thief and computer geek, not a stalker."

Sandi added "I didn't really think he was a stalker. I just said that because I was jealous of the attention Quinn was getting and wanted to ruffle her feathers a little."

Stacy said "But think about it. Why does he want to meet Jim so badly? Why was he being excessively nice to Quinn just now?"

Before Sandi can answer Quinn speaks.

"Stacy, Jeffy's not a stalker. It's just a coincidence that we ran into each other twice in as many days. He wants Sandi's contact info because he wants to get back in touch with Joey and he wants my info because he wants to connect with an old friend. Granted, it was kind of rude that he didn't seem to notice Nicole, but it doesn't mean I'm being followed around."

Stacy said "I buy the reason he gave his number to Sandi. It's normal that he wants to re-connect with an old friend like Joey. But he seemed a little too interested in you and Jim while he barely acknowledged me and didn't notice Nicole at all. And he didn't ask about me and Chuck. Wouldn't he be just as curious as everyone else who knew him in high school?"

Now, Quinn looked thoughtful.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, that evening...**

Quinn came home and found only Storm there. The puppy ran up to Quinn and wags his tail in anticipation. Quinn knelt down and pet him as he has now grown too heavy for her to pick up.

"That's right, precious. Mommy's home. I'll walk you in a minute."

She walked over to the phone to check her voice mail. From the tone she heard...

"You have twenty-one messages."

Quinn listened to the first message.

"Hey, Quinn, it's Jim. Just wanted to let you know that I'm going to do some Christmas shopping. I'll bring dinner. See you when I get home."

The second message.

"Hey, Quinn, it's Jeffy. Just thought I'd give you a call on my cell. Mind if I hang out with you and Jim sometime?"

The third message:

"Hey, Quinn, Jeffy again. Just wanted to talk to you."

Now, Quinn's a little annoyed. The fourth message:

"Hey, Quinn, it's Jeffy again. Just wondering if you got my message."

**Half an hour later...**

Quinn was totally weirded out as the last nineteen messages have all been from Jeffy. She hoped message twenty-one was someone else.

"Quinn, Jeffy again. I really wanna talk to you. Are you sure you're happy with Jim?"

Quinn was now officially freaked out.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Jim has just returned with dinner: take out Chinese. He finds Quinn freaking out about the twenty phone messages she got from Jeffy.

"...Stacy thinks that Jeffy's stalking me and after these messages I'm starting to wonder if he is!"

Setting the food on the table Jim gave her his opinion.

"You think you might be overreacting a little?"

Quinn said "Jim, this is serious. What if he is stalking me?"

Jim still thinks Quinn's overreacting.

Quinn said "What if he's watching us right now?"

Jim said "Quinn, does he even know where we live?"

Quinn thinks for a minute.

"I don't think so. I only gave him my phone number. But if he is stalking me it's possible that he found out."

Jim said "I'll check out the window."

Jim went to the window and looked out.

"Oh my god, he's right out there with binoculars!"

Quinn immediately rushed to the window and looked. There's no one out there. Jim starts laughing. Now, Quinn's pissed.

"THAT'S NOT FUNNY, JIM!"

"Sorry, couldn't resist. Seriously, though, all you have to go on are these phone messages. How do you know he isn't just overly enthusiastic?"

Quinn asked "What do you mean?"

Jim said "I mean, you've told me all the stories from high school. Sometimes when you run into an old friend you haven't seen in a long time it's easy to fall back into old patterns. I think that's what happened here. He saw you again and it probably awakened some long dormant feelings. It happens. For example, even though Sandi is nowhere near as bitchy as you claim she was in high school I've noticed she can still be like that sometimes. It's human nature 101."

Quinn rolled her eyes.

"God, you can be sooo like Daria sometimes."

She now smiled.

"Just one of the things I love about you."

Quinn now turned serious again.

"Seriously, Jim. What do you think I should do?"

Jim said "Have a talk with him. Remind him that things are different now and if he wants to be friends with you he has to accept that and respect your boundaries. Hopefully, he'll see the light of reason and understand."

Quinn asked "What if he doesn't?"

"Then he has serious psychological problems and we should start worrying. But I think it's too soon to make that call. You probably just need to tell him to curb his enthusiasm and that'll be the end of it."

Quinn looks relieved.

"Okay."

They sit down for dinner.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **At a Starbucks the following afternoon...**  
 **Music:** "Disturbia" by Rihanna

Quinn and Jeffy were seated at a table and having coffee.

Quinn said "Thanks for coming, Jeffy."

Jeffy said "No problem, Quinn. What's on your mind?"

Quinn said "Jeffy, we need to talk."

"About?"

"Are you stalking me?"

Jeffy nearly spat out his coffee.

"What!? No. Where'd you get an idea like that?"

Quinn said "Stacy thinks you are. I didn't believe her at first but then you left twenty messages on my machine."

Jeffy said "I just wanted to catch up."

Quinn said "Twenty messages is more than a little excessive, don't you think."

Jeffy looked like a kid who was caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

Quinn asked "What's going on?"

Jeffy sighed.

"I thought I was over you. That was before I ran into you on Friday. Now I realise that I do still have feelings for you."

Quinn said "I'm flattered, but the truth is that I have a boyfriend now. I like you as a friend and if we're going to be friends you have to accept that that's all we'll ever be."

"I understand," said Jeffy, "I guess I did get carried away. Sorry it freaked you out."

"That's okay. If you need to talk to me and I'm not there just leave one message. I'll respond as soon as I can."

Jeffy smiled.

"So, how'd Jim take it?"

"He thinks all I need to do is have a talk with you about it."

Jeffy said "He was right. I'm sorry I got so eager."

Quinn said "That's okay. Now that we've cleared the air we can put all of this weirdness behind us."

They resume making small talk.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Jeffy's apartment, the following Friday evening...**

The apartment was a one bedroom with a kitchen and a living room. The living room is separated from the kitchen by a wall with an open walk through entrance. The kitchen is connected to the bedroom by a small hallway. The first door is the laundry room. The second is the bathroom and after that is a door leading to the bedroom. In the living room Joey and Jeffy are catching up. Sandi is with them.

Jeffy said "So, you two are an item now."

Joey said "Yeah, dude. We just hit it off."

Sandi added "Everything about this relationship just feels right, so far."

Jeffy said "That's cool."

Sandi said "I need to use the bathroom. I'll only be a second."

Jeffy pointed down the hall.

"Second door on the left."

"Thanks."

Sandi got up and made her way to the bathroom. She noticed that the bedroom door is a crack open. Something through the opening catches her eye. She opened the bedroom door all the way. What she saw made her gasp in horror.

"JOEY!!!"

Joey and Jeffy both ran toward a too terrified to speak Sandi.

Joey asked "What's wrong?"

Sandi pointed into the bedroom. Joey looks and he gasps. The walls are all covered in photos of Quinn. There are photos of her from high school, college and everything else. Some of the pictures were obviously taken with a telephoto lens as they depict Quinn in various stages of undress. There are even pictures of her in the shower. There's a copy of the nude painting that Jane made in August. In one corner is a shrine. On the altar is one of Quinn's old hairbrushes from high school with some of her hair in it. Behind the altar is a life size poster of Quinn with the words "I'll only ever love her." Scrawled in red over her image. Sandi and Joey are freaked.

Jeffy said "One day I'll show it to Quinn and she'll realize just how much she means to me. Then she'll leave Jim and we can be together forever."

Joey and Sandi both stare at Jeffy in disbelief.

Sandi said "Jeffy, what the hell!?!"

Joey said "Yeah, dude. This is really twisted."

Jeffy said "It proves that I love her and only her."

Sandi said "No, it proves that you're sick in the head."

Joey said "She's right, man. If Quinn sees this she'll totally freak. And Jim'll kick your ass for sure."

Jeffy laughed. The laugh had a DeMartino like quality.

"Jim, yeah, right. He's a total brain."

Sandi said "He's a brain who works out and has a job that involves physical labor."

Joey said "Yeah, he's a brain but he's built like a jock."

Jeffy said "I figured you wouldn't understand."

He now has a psychotic grin.

"Quinn and I are meant to be."

Joey turned to his girlfriend.

"C'mon, Sandi, we're leaving. Jeffy, you need help."

With that, Joey and Sandi leave.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, a short time later...**

Quinn and Jim were getting ready for a night on the town. There's a knock on the door.

Quinn said "Jim, could you get that, honey."

"Sure."

Jim looked out the peephole before opening the door. It's Joey and Sandi. Joey said "We need to tell you guys something. Is Quinn here?"

Jim said "Yeah, we were just getting ready to go out."

He let Sandi and Joey in. Quinn came out with her hair done and wearing a sexy yet classy dress.

She said "Sandi, Joey, we were just about to go clubbing. Wanna join us?"

Sandi said "Quinn, we have some bad news."

Joey added "You might want to sit down for this."

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**  
 **Music:** "Possession Obsession" by Daryl Hall and John Oates.

Sandi and Joey have just told Quinn and Jim about what they saw at Jeffy's. Quinn's reaction was what one would expect.

"WHAT!?! YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!!!"

Joey said "I wish we were."

Sandi said "Quinn, you might be in danger."

Jim looked very concerned.

"Quinn, maybe we shouldn't go out tonight. In fact, it might be a good idea to call the cops."

Quinn thinks it over for a second.

"No."

Jim, Joey and Sandi are shocked.

"NO!?!"

Quinn said "I'll call him and tell him in no uncertain terms that this stops now."

Quinn immediately got out her cellphone.

"Jeffy, I just had a very weird conversation with Joey and Sandi."

Jeffy, on the other end, said "They told you about the pictures. Quinn, I'm in love with you. I can't help it."

"Jeffy, this isn't love, it's obsession."

Jeffy said "You're all I can ever think about. I need you. I'll always be devoted to you."

"Jeffy, this is stalking. It has to stop."

"But...but..."

Quinn suddenly had a thought.

"Jeffy, was it just a coincidence that I bumped into you last week?"

Jeffy said "Fine, I admit it. I knew you'd take that route home from work. I thought that if I helped you out of a jam you'd finally love me. So I threw that jagged piece of metal in front of your car. I just wanted you to love me. I also had some tech geek from the office hack your computer when Jim was looking for a job. He changed the contact information so when they thought they were calling Grace, Sloane and Paige they were really calling my cell."

Quinn gasped.

"You blacklisted Jim!?! You son of a bitch!"

"I did it because I figured if Jim stayed unemployed you'd leave him and we could be together. Everything I do is for you. Can't you see that?"

Quinn was absolutely livid.

"Jeffy, you listen to me and you listen real good. If you follow me around, if you call me, if you even talk to anyone I know again I will call the police. Do I make myself clear?"

"But, Quinn, I love you."

"Hear me out, Jeffy...I...NEVER...WANT...TO...SEE...YOU...AGAIN."

With that, she hangs up.

**Jeffy's apartment, at that very moment...**

Jeffy said "You were supposed to understand."

He now has a psychotic grin.

"I'll make you understand. ha, ha, ha, HA, HA, HA, AH, AH, HA, HA, HA!!!"  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, a short time later...**

Quinn, Sandi and Joey were watching a movie on TV. Jim is not there.

Sandi said "It was nice of Jim to go get pizza."

Quinn, having calmed down, was now visibly frightened.

"Was it such a good idea to let Jim leave? What if Jeffy finds him and hurts him?"

Joey said "You called the police right after you hung up on Jeffy. He's probably in handcuffs now."

Quinn said "I'm still worried. Thanks for staying overnight."

Sandi said "After everything you've done for me how could we not?"

Quinn smiled. Back in high school Sandi would've never gone to such lengths for anyone. Just then, Storm barks.

Quinn asked "What is it, Storm? Is Daddy back with the pizza?"

Just then, the door is violently kicked open. It's Jeffy.

He said "Quinn, I want you. One way or another."

He lunged at them only to be tackled by Joey. Jeffy tried to punch and kick Joey off of him. He finally picks up a table lamp and smashes it over Joey's head, knocking him out cold.

Sandi screamed "YOU PSYCHO!!"

Enraged beyond feeling fear, she lunged at Jeffy. Jeffy back hands her so hard that she falls to the floor and is unconscious. Wanting to protect his family, Storm lunges and Jeffy with his teeth bared. Jeffy kicks him away. Quinn goes from frightened to enraged.

"YOU BASTARD!!!"

She lunges at him but he shoves her to the floor, hard.

Jeffy said "Quinn, please, I need you."

Quinn said "You're crazy, Jeffy. You need help."

"No, I need you and...I WILL HAVE YOU!!"

He then lunged at her. Quinn tried to run toward the bedroom, intending to lock herself in and call the police. Jeffy grabs her by the shoulder and shoves her against the wall.

"I want to love you. Why are you making me do this?"

Quinn tried to sturggle but he was just too strong. He forcefully kissed her.

"Nnnnnn....NMMMMMMM....HMMMMM...."

Quinn wiggled one of her hands free from his grasp and hit the side of Jeffy's face. Jeffy got off of her. Quinn tried to run but Jeffy tackled her from behind and used his body weight to pin her down. He then tried to force her pants down.

"NOOOOOOO!!!!" Quinn screamed.

Pushing her face down to silence her, Jeffy said "You're mine, Quinn...YOU KNOW YOU WANT THIS!!!"

Quinn struggled in terror but to no avail. She began to cry as she realized that she was about to be raped and there was nothing she could do. Before Jeffy could get her pants down low enough to proceed, however, Quinn suddenly didn't feel his weight on her anymore. No longer being pinned down she looked up to find out why Jeffy was no longer trying to force her pants down.

**Music:** "Rambo Final Boss Theme"

Jim was back and had Jeffy in a choke hold. He continued to tighten his already vice like grip around Jeffy's neck while Jeffy struggled for air. Quinn was too shocked to say or do anything. All too soon, Jeffy's eyes close and his body goes limp. At this point, Jim released him and he fell to the floor with a loud thud. Quinn rushed to Jim and hugged him.

"Oh, Jim, I was so scared!"

"Quinn!" said Jim, "Are you alright!?"

"H...He tried to rape me! Th...Thank God you came when you did!"

Jim said "You're safe now Quinn. I called the police when I heard the commotion. They're on their way."

Quinn looked at the lifeless Jeffy.

"Is...is..he..."

"Dead?"

Quinn nodded.

"No, just unconscious," said Jim, "He'll feel like shit when he wakes up, though."

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

By the time Jeffy wakes up he's in handcuffs. Quinn and Jim were talking to one of the police on the scene.

The cop said to Jim "You've made what's called a 'citizens arrest'. You should be very proud?"

Jim said "He was about to rape my girlfriend. It was the only thing to do."

The cop said "When you can, I'll need all three of you to accompany me to the station so that your statements can go on record."

Jeffy screamed "HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME, QUINN? I LOVE YOU!!"

Quinn said "You tried to rape me, you sick freak! I never wanna see you again!"

"YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS, QUINN!!! YOU'LL PAY!!!"

The cop said "I'd remind you of your right to remain silent if we didn't already find more than enough evidence at your place to convict your ass."

Quinn and Jim smiled.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
 **Pizza King, evening...**

Quinn and Nicole were having pizza and talking.

Quinn said "So, that's what happened."

Lindy was clearly amazed.

"Whoa, that's pretty intense! You okay?"

Quinn said "I'm a little skittish. I'm just glad Jim stopped him before he could rape me."

Nicole asked "When's the trial?"

Quinn said "There isn't going to be one. After Jeffy's lawyer saw the evidence against him he asked to cut a deal. Jeffy agrees to undergo in-patient psychiatric care at a maximum security mental hospital in exchange for the charges being dropped."

Stunned, Nicole said "And you actually agreed to that!? Why!?"

Quinn explained "Because once the initial shock wore off I felt sorry for him."

Quinn now looked sad.

"Part of this is my fault. If I hadn't strung Jeffy along all through high school maybe he wouldn't have gone crazy and none of this would have happened."

Nicole smiled reassuringly.

"Quinn, you had no way of knowing this would happen. You don't deserve to be stalked, harassed or raped. After all, plenty of other guys have had a crush on you that never turned into a dangerous obssession and psychotic break."

Quinn said "I know, but I still feel a little guilty. At least this way Jeffy will get some help and maybe he'll be able to live a normal life someday."

"Let's hope."

They clink their soda cups together and drink to that.

**End.**

**Next Time**  
Because of what happened in this episode Quinn decides to take martial arts classes. There's just one catch: her sensei is Ms. Barch.


	8. The Karate Quinn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After her recent assault by Jeffy, Quinn decides to take up martial arts. Unfortunately, her sensei is Ms. Barch, who's militant rhetoric causes Quinn to develop an aggressive streak that makes everyone uncomfortable.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"The Karate Quinn"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**A restaurant in Lawndale, noon...**

Quinn and Stacy were having lunch together and catching up.

Quinn said "...so now Jim's all worried about my safety. It'd be sweet if it weren't so annoying."

Stacy said "I can see why he's being like that. On Thanksgiving he saw his father smack you around. A few short weeks later was the Jeffy incident. Jeffy would've raped and possibly even killed you if Jim hadn't come to the rescue."

Quinn said "I'm pretty shaken up from that one, too. I just feel a little smothered by Jim's sudden overprotectiveness."

Stacy said "Chuck can be like that. Especially since my job involves going to neighborhoods that are somewhat dicey. I actually took some judo classes just to shut him up. Now, he's finally stopped insisting I carry a taser at all times."

At this point, Stacy got an idea.

"Maybe you should take a self defense class. Jim would probably sleep easier if he knew you could reliably defend yourself when he's not around."

Quinn looked thoughtful.

* * *

 **Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**  
 **Music:** "Fighter" by Christina Aguilera

Jim and Quinn were watching the evening news.

The news anchor said "Our next story concerns a burgulary in Lawndale. Field reporter Stacy Ruttheimer is on the scene."

The TV cut to Stacy standing in front of the Taylor house with a microphone.

She said "Thank you, Jeff. I'm in Crewe Neck, a gated community in Lawndale. It's not the type of place where one would expect a lot of crime. Last night, however, the home behind me was burglarized."

Steve Taylor came into view.

Stacy said "I'm here with the home's owner, Mr. Steven Tayolr. Mr. Taylor, can you tell our viewers what happened?"

Steve said "I was on a dinner date with my new girlfriend. When I came home I found the window to my trophy room smashed open and all of the fine china was gone. The burglar even took all of my hunting trophys and stole a three pound diamond that I had on display in my parlor."

Stacy said "I see. It appears that Lawndale, a community of upper middle class suburbanites now faces one of the big city problems that it's residents moved here to escape. Stacy Ruttheimer, WSBC News. Back to you, Jeff."

The TV cuts back to the studio. The anchor, Jeff Burgundy, is a handsome 40 year old with slicked back light brown hair and a Magnum, PI mustache.

Jeff said "Thank you, Stacy. After the commercial break we'll talk to entertainment correspondent Tori Jehrico. And later on, in our month long special on sexuality in the new millenium, "The Female Sexual Response: Nature's Rubix Cube.""

During the commercial Quinn talks to Jim.

"Jim, I've been thninking about how recent events have shaken us both up and made you concerned about my safety."

Jim said "I've been thinking about that, too. I know that I can't protect you 24/7 and that scares me. Especially since Jeffy tried to rape you. What if I'm not there the next time you're in physical danger?"

Quinn said "That's why I need a way to protect myself when you're not around."

"That's what I'm thinking," said Jim, "This story about a burglary just now makes me feel even more convinced you need your own protection."

Jim reached under the end table and got out a locked box.

"That's why I got you this."

He handed the box and key to Quinn. She opened it up and gasped. Inside was a Beretta 92FS handgun.

Jim said "I bought it last week at Shooter McGee's and picked it up today after they finished the background check on both of us. I want you to have it and I want you to take concealed carry classes and get a permit."

Quinn frowned.

"Jim, I appreciate this but I'm not comfortable with the idea of carrying a gun everywhere I go."

Jim said "I can't return it. All sales at Shooter McGee's are final. Besides, how else are you going to protect yourself?"

Quinn said "I was thinking of taking martial arts classes. I could learn to defend myself and get a workout at the same time since I'm starting to get bored with power yoga."

Quinn locked the case and handed it back to Jim.

"That could work," he said, "Being able to kick ass works just as well as having a gun. I can always take this thing to a range and blow off steam with some target practice."

Quinn smiled.

* * *

**The next day at Lawndale Fitness Center...**

Quinn has just gotten out of her power yoga class when she saw a flyer on the bulletin board. It reads:

"Take Back The Night Taijutsu Class. Are you tired of being a victim? Do you want to learn how to fight back? Take Back The Night offers classes held daily at the Lawndale High School Gymnasium. Here, you learn Taijutsu, the hand to hand fighting style of the Ninja of Feudal Japan. Take back the night!"

This was followed by a list of times and classes. Quinn saw a stack of sign up sheets directly under the flyer. She took one and filled it out.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, that evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having dinner and talking about their day.

Quinn said "...so I signed up for the beginners class."

Jim said "That's great, honey. Taijutsu will definetly allow you to protect yourself better. In fact, parts of it are used by military special ops in their combat training."

Quinn said "That's cool. I should really be able to kick ass. Soon, my days of being a victim will be over."

"Amen to that."

* * *

**Lawndale High, the following evening...**

Quinn and the rest of the beginners class were sitting cross legged on the floor. They are wearing white uniforms with the words "Take Back The Night" stitched on the back. Because they are beginners they are wearing white belts. Most of the other students, all female, are teenagers and students at Lawndale high. Some are students at Lawndale State. Quinn, being 23, is the oldest by a good three years. The instructer comes in. It's Ms. Barch. She's wearing the same uniform as the students but hers says "Instructor" under the logo and she has a black belt.

Ms. Barch said "Welcome to my "Take Back The Night Taijutsu Class for Beginners". I am your instructor, Ms. Barch. Here, you will learn not to rely on a MAN for your protection. If only they had these classes when I was a teenager. Maybe then I wouldn't have spent TWENTY TWO THANKLESS YEARS WAITING HAND AND FOOT ON A BUTT SCRATCHING IMBICILE JUST TO HAVE HIM JILT ME FOR A BARELY LEGAL SKANK!!!!!!"

Quinn and the others look apprehensive. Ms. Barch calms down.

"Now then, what is the golden rule?"

Quinn raised her hand.

"Yes."

"The golden rule is 'do unto others as you would have others do unto you'."

"WRONG!! That's what we tell children but that's not the world we live in. We live in a violent world because it's RUN BY MEN!! The real golden rule is 'strike first, strike hard, show NO MERCY!!!'"

Quinn looks even more apprehensive.

* * *

**Pizza King, later that evening...**

Quinn and Stacy were having pizza while Quinn tells her about the class.

"...once she stopped ranting and started showning us moves, though, it was actually fun. I learned how to use an attackers own forward momentum to wrestle him too the ground."

Stacy said "That's cool. We actually learned the same thing in those judo classes I took. What else did you learn there?"

"I learned that Taijutsu is divided into three disciplines. The one we started tonight is called ju-taijutsu, which is defensive. It consists of blocks, dodges and throws. Tomorrow night we start with daiken-taijutsu, which is offensive. We learn punches, kicks and chops. Next week, we'll be introduced to the third discipline, kobudo-jutsu, where we learn to use everyday objects as weapons."

"Sounds like taijutsu covers all of the basics."

Quinn said "It does. I'll never be unarmed. Soon, I'l be able to use my body and my environment as a weapon."

Stacy smiled.

"Quinn the ninja. Who would've thought?"

Both women laugh.

* * *

 **Aqua Dance Club, two weeks later...**  
 **Music:** "Bringing Sexy Back" by Justin Timberlake

Quinn and Jim were in the crowd on a date. They are dancing and having a good time when a drunk guy approaches them.

The drunk said "Mind if I cut in?"

He shovesdJim away and put his arms around Quinn, making her uncomfortable. Jim tapped the guy on the shoulder.

"Hey, that's my girlfriend, jerk."

"Not for long, she isn't."

Quinn pulled away from him.

"Excuse me, but I want to dance with my boyfriend, not you."

"I wasn't askin'"

Jim said "Hey, pal.."

Before he could get another word out Quinn slapped the drunk, which enraged him.

"YOU BITCH!!!!"

The drunk threw a punch at Quinn. She grabbed his fist with her left hand, spun inside, grabbed his belt with her right hand and threw him over her. Jim was amazed. The drunk staggers to his feet.

"NOBODY DOES THAT TO ME, BITCH!!"

Jim moves to protect Quinn. Before he gets to her, though, she assumes an offensive posture.

"HAI."

She strikes the drunk in the face with the palm of her right hand. As she withdraws her right hand she punches him in the gut with her left. As she withdraws her left hand she uses her right to throw an straight punch with her nuckles extended. This one strikes the drunk in his nose. She finishes him off with a leaping roundhouse kick that sends him to the floor. As he lay there she straddled his chest, pinning his arms under her knees. She is about to strike his face repeatedly but notices that he is not only unconscious but his nose is broken. She gasps in shock and gets off of him.

"Did I really just do that?"

Quinn smiles as a feeling of empowerment over takes her.

* * *

**Act II**   
**The Morgendorffer house, the following evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having dinner with Jake and Helen. For once, Jake managed to cook something that wasn't a disgusting concoction.

Quinn said "Last night this guy got fresh with me and I totally kicked his ass."

Jim said "It's true. You should've seen her."

Jake now looked upset. Everyone knew what was coming.

"You know, my father told me that you have to kick someones ass before you'll be recognized as a man. 'Real men fight, Jake.' 'You have to kill or be killed, Jake.' 'Whoever said violence solves nothing was a commie who should be shot for treason.' All because he was a RIGID, BLOODTHIRSTY, PSYCHOTIC SON OF A..."

Helen barked "JAKE!"

Jake snapped out of it.

"Sorry. What were we talking about?"

Quinn was visibly embarrassed.

_Same old clueless Dad._

Helen turned her attention to Quinn.

"I think it's nice that you're learning to defend yourself, Quinn. Just don't let it go to you're head."

Quinn asked "What do you mean, Mom?"

Helen said "Violence should be a last resort. Having the skills you now possess can make it tempting to misuse them. I just hope you remember to show restraint. I didn't raise you to be a bully."

Quinn defiantly folded her arms.

"I don't recall you doing much raising at all."

Helen scowled.

"What do you mean by that?"

Quinn said "Me and Daria had to raise ourselves because you were so obsessed with your career. Now, you're lecturing me about not letting things go to my head. Talk about hypocritical."

Angry, Helen said "I don't care for your tone, young lady."

"And I don't care for your talking to me like I'm still a little girl. I'm a grown woman now. One who can seriously kick ass. If you wanted to be a parent, you should've been one when Daria and I were actually kids."

Helen was now seriously pissed. Jim and Jake are now visibly uncomfortable.

Jim said "Um, Quinn, maybe this isn't the best time to talk about these things?"

Quinn barked "Stay out of this, Jim!"

Jim moved back and let out an "EEP."

Jake said "Helen, Jim's right. Maybe we shouldn't have this discussion at dinner."

"LET ME HANDLE THIS, JAKE!"

"EEEEP!"

Quinn barked "DON'T YOU DARE YELL AT DAD, MOM!"

Helan shouted "WELL, I NEVER. HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT IN MY OWN HOUSE!"

Quinn stands up and assumes a fighting stance. Now, Jim and Jake are VERY uncomfortable.

* * *

**Lawndale High, the next day...**

Quinn Morgendorffer was walking the halls of Lawndale High despite having graduated more than five years earlier. She is there to see Ms. Barch.

_Class is out for the day, so I can catch her at a convenient time._

She entered Ms. Barch's science classroom. It hasn't changed one bit since the last time she set foot in there back in 2001. Ms. Barch was grading some tests.

"This student did really good. A+."

She looked at the name on the paper: John Morrison. She scowls.

"Make that a D-."

She looks up and sees Quinn.

"Ah, Ms. Morgendorffer. You wanted to see me?"

Quinn said "Yes, Ms. Barch. I need to talk to you about the taijutsu class."

"Of course."

Quinn said "You see, it's like this. I signed up because I wanted to be able to defend myself from physical attack. Last Saturday night I was at a night club and successfully fought off a guy who tried to get fresh with me."

Ms. Barch said "Wonderful. See, you don't need a man to protect yourself."

Quinn said "Yeah, well I was with my parents for Sunday dinner and I picked a fight with my Mom that almost got physical. It made both my Dad and my boyfriend very uncomfortable."

"Of course it did. Strong women threaten the patriarchy."

Quinn said "That's what I want to talk about, this ultra feminist rhetoric. I don't see what it has to do with self defense."

Ms. Barch said "Remember, we live in a world unjustly run by men. That's why I instill such doctrine in my students, so that you can fight male opression. After all, a man...I mean an attacker deserves no mercy."

Quinn said "Well, be that as it may, I signed up so that I could learn to defend myself. I can now and the rhetoric is starting to make me too agressive. My mother warned me not to let this go to my head. It's starting to do just that. I want to leave the class."

Ms. Barch was stunned.

"You can't be serious! You're my best student."

"I'm sorry, but I just wanted to learn how to protect myself and I've done that. I don't want to turn into some bully."

"You don't understand. You've progressed so rapidly I actually wanna transfer you to my advanced class."

Quinn was now the one who is stunned, and more than a little interested. Ms. Barch noticed this.

"You'd love it," said Barch, "Your sparring partners would be closer to your level and the advanced class participates in tournaments."

Now, Quinn is very interested.

"I...I'm really that good!?"

"Of course."

Quinn wanted to say yes, but shook her head.

"I'm sorry. I can't"

Ms. Barch said "Fine. I just hope you don't mind having men walk all over you for the rest of her life."

Quinn was now very uncertain as she's reminded of how close she'd come to being raped by Jeffy. She also remembered how empowered she felt when she kicked that drunk guys ass in the club.

It's so liberating to know that I can fight back instead of running away.

Quinn made her decision.

"On second thought...Sign me up."

Ms. Barch smiled.

* * *

 **Training montage...**  
 **Music:** "Rocky Theme"

We see Quinn in the advanced class. First, we see her doing movements in front of the mirror to perfect her form. Next, she's working the heavy bag. Close up shows her fist strike once with extended knuckles, again with her fist sideways and her thumb potruding forward like a spear tip, again with a standard clenched fist, and finally a karate chop. Next, we see Quinn practicing jump kicks and roundhouse kicks. Then, we see her do a body roll that sends her sparring partner flying across the mat. After this, we see Quinn defeat multiple sparring partners, some of whom are black belts. Next, we see Quinn practicing the crane technique. We see her working over a practice dummy. Next, we see Quinn do staff fighting. Finally, we see Quinn doing some more mirror exercises.

* * *

**Playhouse 99 Movie theater, evening...**

Quinn was having a girls night out with Nicole. The two of them were waiting in line for movie tickets.

Nicole asked "So, how are you enjoying the taijutsu classes?"

Quinn said "They're great, Nicole. I'm really learning to let loose my inner warrior. You should try it. It's very empowering."

Laughing, Nicole said "No thanks. Just because I'm of Japanese ancestry doesn't mean I wanna learn to be a ninja, my obsession with Naruto notwithsatnding."

Just then, Quinn seemed to remember something.

"Damn, I left my wallet in the car. Could you hold my spot while I get it?"

"No problem, Quinn."

Quinn left. As soon as she's gone a blond guy in his twenties with tacky clothes a la "Two Wild and Crazy Guys" cuts right in front of Nicole.

Angry, she said "Hey, jerk, go to the back of the line!"

The guy defiantly folded his arms.

"Make me."

Nicole sized him up and immediately realized that she can't match him physically. She let out a defeated sigh. At this point Quinn came back.

"Nicole, what's going on?"

Nicole pointed to the guy in Quinn's spot.

"This asshole cut in. I tried to tell him to go to the back of the line but he won't budge."

Quinn immediately got in his face.

"Hey, fashion disaster, you're in my spot."

He shrugged.

"Hey, you snooze you lose."

Quinn's eyes narrow. She grabbed him by the shirt collar and shoved him into the wall. He's shocked.

Quinn, in a deadly tone of voice, said "You have a choice, loser. Either you walk to the back of the line or I'll drag you there...in pieces."

The line cutter was too frightened to speak. Quinn shakes her fist.

"WELL?"

"Okay, okay. I'll go to the back of the line."

Quinn let him go and he headed to the back in an uncomfortable hurry. Nicole was impressed.

"Wel, Quinn, somebody's wearing her ovaries on the outside today."

Quinn took it the wrong way. She got right in Nicole's face and shook her fist.

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

Stunned, Nicole said "Whoa, take it easy, Quinn. I was giving you a compliment."

"Nobody walks all over me, Nicole. Do you hear me? NOBODY PUSHES AROUND QUINN MORGENDORFFER!"

Now, Nicole was very uncomfortable.

"Okaaayyy, I'm just going to take two very huge steps back now."

She does just that.

* * *

**Lawndale High, evening...**

In front of the school was a banner that read:

"Take Back The Night Tournament For Charity."

All proceeds go to battered womens shelters.

In the gym all of the spectators were watching as Ms. Barch's advanced students participate in this tournament. The spectators include Kevin, Brittany, Sandi, Joey, Stacy, Chuck, Tiffany, Nicole, Jim, Jake and Helen. They are all there to support Quinn.

Kevin said "Cool! Quinn is, like, totally kicking butt."

Stacy said "She's a total badass."

Nicole pulled Jim aside.

"Jim" she said "Have you noticed that Quinn's been kinda, well, agressive lately?"

Jim said "Yeah, she picked a fight with Helen one hight and when she beat up that drunk in the club she looked like she wanted to kill him."

Hearing this, Helen threw in her two cents.

"This is all going to her head, isn't it?"

Nicole said "I'm afraid so."

At this point Ms. Barch walked out to the center of the makeshift arena. She spoke into a microphone.

"Once again, I'd like to thank you for supporting female empowerment. We've raised over a thousand dollars. And now allow me to introduce our finalists."

Ms. Barch pointed to her right.

"In this corner, Rachel Landon."

Jodie's younger sister stepped out onto the mat as the crowd applauded. In the crowd were Andrew and Michelle Landon.

Andrew proudly said "That's my little girl."

Ms. Barch spoke into the microphone and pointed to her left.

"In this corner we have my newest student. This young woman is a martial arts prodigy. I've never seen someone advance so quickly. I give you...Quinn Morgendorffer."

Quinn stepped onto the mat. She smiled and waved to the crowd. Ms. Barch then signaled the two finalists to the mat. They face her and bow. They then bow to each other. After this they assume their fighting stances. Ms. Barch raises her hand in the air.

"Ready."

She rapidly brings her hand down.

"FIGHT!"

Quinn and Rachel cautiously walk in a circle as they size each other up. Quinn soon charges at Rachel with a flurry of strikes and kicks. Rachel easily deflects all of Quinn's blows. Finally, Rachel counters Quinn's attempted jump kick and throws her to the mat. Quinn gets right back up and is now enraged. When Rachel comes at her Quinn ducks a jump kick and strikes Rachel with a roundhouse kick. Rachel tries a series of strikes but Quinn blocks them all. Rachel tries a roundhouse kick but Quinn locks Rachel's kicking leg under her left arm while she uses her right foot to sweep Rachel to the floor. The first one to land three strikes will win the match. Quinn has landed two while Rachel has only landed one. Rachel tries to come at Quinn hard and fast, but Quinn deflects all of Rachel's blows before landing a palm strike that wins the match.

Ms. Barch announced "Winner: Quinn Morgendorffer."

Quinn and Rachel bow to each other and then to the crowd. Ms. Barch comes up to congratulate Quinn.

Quinn suddenly took the microphone and said "I've had nothing but amateurs. I WANT A REAL OPPONENT, MS. BARCH, YOU!"

The whole crowd gasped in shock.

Ms. Barch said "Now, Quinn, I can't. You see, the relationship between sensei and student is a sacred bond and..."

Quinn suddenly did a roundhouse kick that hit Ms. Barch right in the mouth. Ms. Barch scowled with rage as she wiped the blood from her lip.

"The...bond...is...BROKEN!!!"

Quinn said "Bring it, bitch!"

They both assume fighting stances. Quinn does a jump kick, which Barch dodges with ease. She goes at Quinn with a flurry of strikes but Quinn blocks each and everyone. Next, Barch throws a punch. In a single fluid motion Quinn ducks the punch, elbows Barch in the stomach and backhand punches her in the face three times. Quinn then sweeps Barch to the floor and finishes her off with three bullet punches to the face. She stands up and raises both of her fists is triumph.

"I WIN!"

Quinn picked up the microphone.

"I'm the greatest! I have the power! No one can beat me!"

Quinn's friends and family joined her on the mat.

Jim said "Quinn, that was amazing."

Quinn grabbed Jim by the shirt collar and kissed him very forcefully. After the kiss, she grabbed him by the crotch. She shouted into the microphone.

"This is MINE. THIS IS WHERE MY FUTURE BABIES WILL COME FROM. IF ANYONE BUT ME TOUCHES IT, I'LL KILL THEM!"

Everyone gasped in shock. Jim was terrified.

* * *

**Act III**   
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having an argument over Quinn's behavior at the tournament.

Jim said "Quinn, what the hell was all of that about?"

Quinn said "I was just showing my love."

"BY GRABBING MY BALLS IN PUBLIC AND THREATENING EVERYONE!?!"

"Jim, calm down! What's the deal with you, anyway?"

"Quinn, this isn't you at all."

Quinn said "What, you liked me better as a victim!?"

Jim rubbed his temples and groaned in frustration.

"Quinn, it's one thing to defend yourself. But this new agressive attitude of yours is, well, scary."

"What's the matter? Can't stand a strong woman?"

Jim was now even more frustrated.

"No, but your conduct lately would be scary from anyone regardless of gender."

Storm came up to the arguing couple and whimpered.

Quinn said, in an angry tone, "Not now, Storm!"

Jim said "Hey, don't take it out on the dog!"

Quinn turned her attention back to Jim.

"You just don't like it that I don't need you to protect me anymore. You're a sexist, patriarchal...MAN!!!"

Jim said "And you're a bullying feminazi!"

They now stare daggers at each other. Frightened, Storm nudged Quinn and whimpered. She turned to the dog, her eyes flashing with rage.

"I said NOT NOW!!!"

She angrily kicked her puppy.

"YELP!"

Jim shouted "QUINN, WHAT THE HELL!?! THAT'S ANIMAL ABUSE!"

Quinn gasped, shocked and horrified by what she'd just done.

"OHMYGOD!!!"

She ran to Storm and tried to cuddle him.

"OH, Storm. I'm so sorry. Mommy didn't mean to hit you."

Storm ran from her and into his doggie bed, tail between his legs the whole time.

Norrified by what she'd done, Quinn said "Oh, God, What have I done? I'm a terrible person. I'm like that rich mother who gave her son permanent brain damage. I'M JUST LIKE BARBARA BUSH!!"

* * *

**A psychiatrists office, a few days later...**

Quinn was laying on the couch while talking to Dr. Millepedis (The French psychiatrist from "Psycho Therapy".)

Quinn said "After hitting my dog I realized I had developed an anger problem and that's when I made this appointment."

Dr. Millepedis said "I see, Quinn. When did these agression issues start?"

Quinn said "It began when I spent Thanksgiving with my boyfriends parents. His father treated me like crap from the moment I showed up. He made me sleep in a tent during a thunderstorm. During Thanksgiving dinner he and my boyfriend got into an argument that turned physical. I stepped in and Jim's father threw me to the floor and started kicking me. Jim knocked him out for doing that, but I felt so damn helpless and weak. A few weeks later I found out that a guy who had a crush on me in high school has been stalking me ever since. After I told him to stay away from me he went crazy, broke into my apartment and tried to rape me. Jim stopped him and he's now in a mental hospital. I decided to take up martial arts after that. My instructor is a militant feminist who taught me to show no mercy. That's when I started being crazy agressive with everyone."

Dr. Millepedis wrote some notes. He then looked at Quinn afterwards.

"Quinn, I think these recent traumas have caused you to develop a victim complex. You felt helpless and resented it. When you started fighting back that resentment caused you to be needlessly agressive toward everyone. Basically, you felt violated and this new found aggression is an attempt to ensure it never happens again."

Quinn asked "So, what should I do?"

Dr. Millepedis said "You need to talk these feelings out with your loved ones. Let them know that you were made to feel helpless and weak. Tell them you need some reassurance that you are not. The two physical assaults are not a unique experience. These things can happen to anyone. It doesn't mean that you are weak or stupid."

Quinn seemed to feel better.

* * *

**The Morgendorffer house, evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having Sunday dinner with her parents. Daria was there with her new boyfriend, Richard Gilstead. Richard looks like a blond Michael Fulton and is a history teacher.

Richard said "Thanks for having me over, Mr. and Mrs. Morgendorffer."

Helen said "Our pleasure, Richard."

Jake said "Hey, remember the first time Daria brought a boyfriend for dinner?"

Daria said "Yes. Unfortunately, I also remember him running off with you and Jeffy to catch a squirrel and then ditch us to go go-karting all night."

"Can we please not talk about him?" asked Quinn as the feelings of being victimized returned.

Jake said "Yeah, he grew up to be a stalker. Stalking my little girl. AAAGH!!!! I'LL KILL HIM!!"

Helen stepped in.

"JAKE! Remember what I said before Richard got here? About not acting all crazy?"

Jake said "Dammit, Helen, why are you always telling me what to do?"

Helen became angry.

"Because you act like a petulant child who can't get over his daddy issues."

Jake angrily said "Just like you can't get over your control issues!"

Quinn pounded her fist on the table.

"KNOCK IT OFF, YOU TWO!"

Helen flippantly asked "What are you going to do if we don't? Beat us up Bruce Lee style?"

Quinn and Helen stare daggers at each other. They both look ready to kill.

Richard asked Daria "Are they always like this?"

Daria told her boyfriend "No, they normally use weapons."

Helen snapped "Don't you dare start with your sarcasm!"

Jim decided he needs to de-escalate things, fast.

"Would you people just calm down?"

Quinn, Jake and Helen shouted "MAKE US!"

Jim sighed. He'd hoped it wouldn't come to this. He pulled a bottle of pills out of his pocket.

"Okay, look. I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but I have these anti-anxiety pills. I think you should each take one."

Helen said "I don't think so, Jim. Taking pills to alter your mood is unnatural."

Jake said "You're one to talk, former acid queen."

Helen turned to Jim.

"Give me the pills!"

* * *

**The living room, an hour later...**

Everyone was seated in a circle on the floor. Richard was playing an acoustic guitar while everyone else sings.

"Koom-by-ya, My Lord. Koom-by-ya.  
Koom-by-ys, My Lord, Koom-by-ya."

The song ends.

Richard said "That was fun. What should we sing next?"

Daria said "You pick."

Quinn said "I feel soooo good right now. I love you guys."

Helen said "I can't remember the last time I felt so relaxed."

Jim smiled as it was time to let the other shoe drop.

"You guys wanna know something funny? These so-called mood altering pills are just placebos, sugar pills. Our current high spirits are genuine."

Jake was suddenly enraged.

"YOU MEAN WE JUST SANG IN A CIRCLE FOR NOTHING?"

Frustrated, Helen said "Jake, calm down!"

"But, Helen..."

"STOP WHINING, YOU IMMATURE JERK!!!"

"CONTROLLING BITCH!!!"

Helen punched Jake. Everyone gasped in shock. The next shocker was when Jake punched her back.

Helen shouted "HEY, YOU CAN'T HIT ME!!! I'M A WOMAN!!!"

Jake said "Sometimes I wonder."

Helen slugged him again.

Quinn shouted "HEY!"

She punched Helen.

Daria shouted to Quinn "DON'T HIT MOM!"

She punched Quinn. Quinn then punched Daria.

Richard shouted at Quinn "DON'T HIT MY GIRLFRIEND!"

He shoved Quinn off of Daria. Jim reacted by punching Richard.

"DON'T SHOVE MY GIRLFRIEND!"

The gloves come off. Helen and Jake are beating each other up while Daria and Quinn beat each other up.

"BRAT!"

"BRAIN!"

"BRAT!"

"BRAIN!"

At the same time Jim traded punches with Richard.

"GEEK!"

"GEARHEAD!"

Helen and Jake were also exchanging punches.

"BITCH!"

"MAMAS BOY!"

**Three hours later...**

The living room was completely destroyed. All four Morgendorffers as well as Jim and Richard are bruised and bloodied.

Quinn said "I can't believe we just completely beat the shit out of each other."

Jim said "Sorry I busted you in the mouth, Richard."

Richard said "Sorry I shoved your girlfriend, Jim."

Daria said "Sorry I called you a brat, Quinn."

Quinn said "Sorry I hit you, Daria."

Helen said "Jake, I'm sorry I punched you first."

Jake said "And I'm sorry I punched you back."

Daria said "At least we got it all out of our system."

Helen looked thoughtful.

"I wonder what came over us."

Daria said "I know exactly what came over us. It was the simple fact that all people are inherantly violent."

Quinn said "Daria, how can you say that?"

"You mean besides the fact that we all just spent three hours beating each other up?"

Quinn frowned.

"I see your point. But I don't believe people are naturally violent."

"Quinn," said Jim, "You've met my father and recently turned aggressive to cope with the trauma of an assault."

Helen said "I don't believe people are naturally violent either."

"Yeah," Jake added, "It's all the crap they put on TV. Why doesn't the government step in and tells us what we can and can't watch?"

"The first amendment" said Daria.

Jake said "Still, shame on the networks for putting this on the air! And shame on the fanfic authors who write this stuff! They need to get a freakin' life!!"

**The end...Hey, WHAT THE FUCK!?! YOU JUST BADMOUTH ME, JAKE!?!**

"EEP....WildDog!? Um...you see..."

**Jake, I'll let it slide this time, but break the fourth wall to insult me again and your next heart attack will be fatal...GOT IT!**

**End Chapter.**

* * *

**Author's Notes**

Inspired by the Family Guy episode "Lethal Weapons".


	9. The Spiral Path

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trent shows up at Quinn's place and guilt trips her into taking him in.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"The Spiral Path"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Mirage, California, April, 2005...**

In the basement of the run down house that they call home Mystic Spiral were practicing for an upcoming gig. They play the following song...

"Pain and stirfe  
Twist the knife  
It falls apart  
End my life"

At this point, Jesse begins his guitar solo. He kills it until...

"SREEEEEECHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-URG"

He breaks a guitar string after generating some upleasant feedback. They all stop playing.

Max said "Jesse, what the hell?"

Nick added "Yeah, man. You've botched that part how many times now?"

Jesses, looking like his usual detached self, just shrugged.

"I dunno."

Max and Nick both stared daggers at him. Trent decided to defuse the situation.

"Hey, Jess, is something wrong?"

Max said "Yeah, dude. We got a gig tonight. Can't have you flake on us while on stage."

Jesse said "Sorry, man. I just had a lot on my mind lately."

Trent asked "Like what?"

Jesse answered "I'm in love."

His bandmates all gasp.

Max said "You can't be in love, man. That's Nick's thing. You're supposed to be our resident womanizer."

Nick walked up to Jesse and patted him on the back.

"Congratulations, man. So who is she?"

"Her stage name is Exotica, but her real name is Jennifer."

Max said "Dude! You're gonna go monogamous for a stripper!?"

"Yeah."

Nick said "I'm happy for ya, dude."

Angry, Max said "Don't freakin' encourage him, Nick."

Nick gets mad at Max.

"Dude, don't start in on that just because you're all bitter!"

"Don't get on me just because you're engaged!"

Trent said "Um, guys..."

Max and Nick shout over each other while Jesse just stands and stares at nothing in particular. Trent now looks worried.

* * *

**Lawndale, Maryland, February, 2007...**

Quinn and Jim were eating dinner in their apartment.

Quinn asked "Jim, wanna do something special for Valentines Day?"

Jim said "Just spending it with you would make it special."

Quinn smiled.

"Jim, that's so sweet of you to say that."

Jim said "We could try another romantic camping trip if it weren't for the fact that this is still winter."

Quinn said "After what happened last time?! No thanks."

Just then, there's a knock on the door.

Jim said "I'll get it."

He opened the door. It's Trent. Jim has never met him and therefore doesn't know who he is.

"Can I help you?"

Trent, who doesn't know Jim, assumed he got the wrong apartment.

"Sorry, wrong place. Um, Do you know which apartment is Quinn Morgendorffer's?"

Jim turned toward his girlfriend.

"Quinn, it's for you."

Quinn approached the door and recognized him.

"Trent!?"

"Hey, Quinn."

Jim was now confused.

"Do you two know each other?"

Quinn said "Jim, this is Trent, Jane's brother. Trent, this is my boyfriend, Jim."

Trent and Jim shake hands.

Quinn asked "What are you doing here?"

"Long story. Can I come in?"

"Sure."

* * *

 **Later...**  
 **Music:** "Crazy Bitch" by Buckcherry  
 _Hey, you're a crazy bitch_  
 _But you fuck so good I'm on top of it_

Quinn, Jim and Trent were seated at the table and catching up.

Trent said "Thanks for the food. I haven't had a home cooked meal in a while."

Quinn asked "So, why are you here?"

"I need a place to crash" Trent answered.

"And instead of asking Daria and Jane you came all the way from New York to ask me!?" asked a surprised Quinn.

Trent said "Yeah. Daria and Jane are sorta mad at me right now. I would've asked your parents but considering how your mom got on my case that time me and Janey were crowded out of our house I decided you were a safer bet. I didn't know you had a live-in boyfriend."

Jim asked "Why are Daria and Jane mad at you?"

Quinn added "Yeah, what happened?"

Trent said "A year ago I got a new band together, Helpful Mystic Korn Explosion, and quit my job at O'Malley's to pursue music full time. After a whole year without a decent gig the others quit and got jobs. I lost my apartment because I didn't have any money so I asked to crash with Daria and Jane and they slammed the door in my face."

Quinn said "Duh, They don't wanna be mooched off of. They can't afford to support you."

Trent said "I remembered how nice you were to me when I crashed there before so I came here."

Jim said "I guess we could let you stay until you get your own place."

Quinn gave Jim an anxious look. He obviously doesn't know what he's getting himself into.

"Jim, can I have a word with you? In private."

Quinn's tone let Jim know that he doesn't really have a choice. They both go into the bedroom and shut the door.

Quinn said "Jim, I don't think that it's a good idea for him to stay here."

* * *

**Mirage, 2005...**

At the county courthouse Nick and his girlfriend, whose name I don't remember, were getting married. The rest of Mystic Spiral are acting as witnesses.

The judge said "By the power vested in me by the State of California I now pronounce you husband and wife."

Nick and his bride kiss. Trent and Jessie look disinterested while Max looks pissed off. Later, as they are walking through the hall, they're talking.

Trent asked "So, how are you gonna spend your honeymoon?"

Nick said "Two weeks in Tijuana."

His bride said "It's all we can afford right now."

Max said "Well, when you get back we can score some more gigs."

Jessie said "Yeah, we gotta be on the verge of making it by now."

Nick and his new wife look doubtful.

Nick's wife asked him "Do you wanna tell them, or should I?"

Nick said "I'll do it."

He faced his bandmates.

"Look, guys, it's been four years and we're no closer to a break than we were in Lawndale. Face it, Max's brother took us for a ride."

Angry, Max said "What are you getting at, Nick?"

"I'm leaving Mystic Spiral."

The other three gasped.

Jessie said "Dude!"

Trent said "Whoa!"

Nick continued "I need to take my future more seriously. I got a job and I start right after we get back from our honeymoon."

Max snarled "You can't quit now. We're on the verge of making it big."

"No we aren't, Max. Face facts, Mystic Spiral will never hit it big. We're probably gonna wind up doing Hall and Oates covers at weddings before too long. I want out before that happens."

"You're outta your mind, dude. The Spiral sticks together no matter what."

Trent said "Calm down, guys. Nick, are you sure about this?"

"Yes."

With that, Nick and his bride walked away. The other three guys just stand there in stunned silence.

* * *

**Lawndale, 2007...**

Quinn and Jim were discussing the situation with Trent.

Quinn said "Jim, we can't let him stay here."

"Why not?"

"Because he's a lazy bum who'll probably mooch off of us indefinitely."

Jim said "Are you serious?"

"Yes."

Jim said "So we just kick him out in the street!? He's your friend, Quinn!"

Quinn said "If we let him stay here he'll just sit around and vege while we work our asses off to support him."

Jim said "Okay, so how did Daria and Jane get him off his ass when he showed up in Boston?"

"Jane pointed out that they couldn't afford to support him and he had to make a contribution."

"So we do the same thing," said Jim, "We let him stay here but let him know that we at least expect him to help out."

Quinn looked thoughtful.

**Later...**

Trent was scratching Storm behind the ears when Quinn and Jim come back out.

Trent said "Cool dog. What's his name?"

Jim said "Storm."

"Cool."

Quinn said "Trent, Jim and I talked it over and decided you can stay."

"Cool."

"But, you have to help out. And you either get a band together and score some gigs or get a job."

Trent said "I can do that."

Quinn and Jim join him at the table.

Trent said "This is just like the time I stayed with Jane and Daria. Remember when they spent a weekend in Washington, DC and you came over to check on me? We had drinks, talked a bit and...you know. That was a hot night."

Quinn was mortified.

"DAMMIT, TRENT! WE AGREED TO NEVER SPEAK OF THAT!!!"

Trent scratched his head in thought.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot about that."

Quinn was now really pissed.

* * *

**Act II**

**Morgendorffer and Daughter consulting, the next day...**

Quinn was in her office with her assistant, Erin Chambers. She's fuming about the night before.

"...so I had to go through the shame of telling my current boyfriend that while I was getting over my ex I got drunk one night and had sex with Trent. It was sooo humiliating."

Erin asked "How'd Jim take it?"

Quinn said "Since it was before I met him he actually took it real well. It was still embarrassing to tell him about my biggest sexual regret, though."

"Do Daria and Jane know?"

"No, and I wanna keep it that way. One of the reasons I regret it is because I know Daria had a huge crush on him back in high school."

Erin said "Look at it this way, Quinn, you didn't waste eight years of your life married to some bastard who gave you herpes."

Now Quinn felt a little guilty. Compared to Erin getting an incurable STD a one night stand with a slacker musician is pretty insignificant.

"Sorry."

Erin said "It's all right, Quinn. I was just pointing out that we all have sexual experiences that we regret. It's awkward and embarrassing, true, but a drunken hookup in your past isn't the end of the world."

Quinn looks thoughtful.

"I guess I was overreacting."

"Just a little bit."

Quinn decided to change the subject.

"Speaking of exes, how is that POS Brian?"

Erin said "He managed to blow his half of everything in less than a year. He actually called me the other day to beg for a handout. I told him where he could stick his request."

Quinn giggled.

"You go, girl."

They fist bump.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, late afternoon...**

Quinn had just come home from work and was dismayed to find Trent sleeping on the couch, right where he was when she and Jim left that morning. She walked over to him and gently shook him in order to wake him up.

"Trent."

No response.

"Trent?"

Still no response. She shakes him harder.

"TRENT!"

Trent wakes up with a start.

"I didn't know she was only fifteen, I swear!"

He sees where he is and calms down.

"Oh, Quinn. What's going on?"

"Trent, what have you done today?"

Trent answered "What have you?"

Quinn rolled her eyes.

"I went to the gym. Then I came home, took a shower, changed clothes and went to work. I just came back from work and decided to check on you before changing clothes and walking my dog."

Trent asked "Where's Jim?"

"He doesn't get off work for another hour. Now tell me about your day."

Trent said "I caught up on sleep."

Quinn shook her head. Same old Trent.

"Look," she said, "I don't mean to nag but you need to remember our terms. You can stay here for now but you can't stay indefinetly. Once you're back on your feet you need to get your own place. And to do that you need to either one, get a band together and start playing gigs or, two, get a job. We'll support you for now but not forever. Don't drag your ass on this."

Trent noted the sweet yet serious tone of Quinn's voice. She's laying down the law without being a bitch about it.

Trent said "Relax, I'll take care of it."

Quinn was skeptical.

"How?"

Trent said nothing, which tells Quinn everything.

"That's what I thought," she said, "Trent, I won't have you laying around and mooching off of me and Jim."

Now, Trent looked sad.

"I'm sorry. It's just so hard to accept that your dreams will never come true. Music is all I know."

Quinn now feels sorry for him.

"Tell you what, Trent. Tomorrow's Saturday so how about you, me and Jim go to Dega Street and put up flyers for a band? Maybe even see if any places are hiring. You'd have a job working in an environment that's familiar and brings you in contact with both prospective bandmates and people who can hook you up with gigs."

Trent said "I dunno."

Quinn said "Or you can move to the homeless shelter."

Trent knows she's serious.

* * *

**Mirage, 2005...**

In the basement of their home the remaining members of Mystic Spiral were practicing. Actually, it's just Trent and Max. And instead of practicing they're wondering where the hell Jessie is.

Max said "Dude, where the hell is Jessie?"

Trent said "He spent last night with his new girlfriend."

Max angrily said "That idiot! Did he remember we have practice today?"

"I think so."

"Do you have that girls number?"

"No."

Max angrily threw down his drumsticks.

"God Dammit!"

At this point the phone rang.

Trent said "I'll get it."

Trent goes to the kitchen and answers the phone.

"Hello?"

On the other end of the line, a guy with way too much bling shouted "WHERE'S EXOTICA!?!"

Trent said "Whoa, man! Calm down."

The guy said "Jennifer was supposed to be at work today. She isn't at her place, that's the first number I called. You her loser boyfriend?"

Trent said "You mean Jessie? He's not here, and neither is Jennifer."

"Dammit!"

The guy hung up. Trent put the phone back on the hook. He's about to leave when it rings again. He picks up.

"Hello."

Jessie's on the other end.

"Yo, Trent."

"Jessie, where are you? We're supposed to be practicing right now."

Jessie said "Jennifer wanted to move to Miami. I went with her."

Trent said "What about the band?"

Jessie looks vacant.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry, bro."

Trent's eyes went wide.

"You're leaving Mystic Spiral!?"

"Yeah."

With that Jessie hung up. Trent looked like he was just stabbed in the gut.

* * *

 **Lawndale, 2007...**  
 **Music:** "Bitches and Money" by Buckcherry  
 _'Cause life an't nothin' but bitches and money_  
 _BITCHES AND MONEY_

Quinn, Jim and Trent were walking down Dega Street on a clear Saturday afternoon. Each of them was carrying a stack of flyers.

Trent said "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

Quinn said "Duh, I'm a marketing consultant. I know what we're doing. Putting out flyers and holding auditions is the best way to go."

They pass by Axl's piercing parlor. Trent stared fondly in the window, which Quinn noticed.

"Don't even think about it," she said in a Helen like tone, "You still need a job and getting some piercings and more tattoos is only gonna hurt that."

Jim said "But you have piercings, Quinn."

"Ears, Jim. A girl with pierced ears isn't scary."

"I wasn't talking about the ones in your ears, Quinn."

Quinn blushed with embarrassment. Just then, she noticed something. That something was a "Help Wanted" sign in the window of the guitar shop.

"Guys, look."

Jim and Trent saw the sign.

Jim said "It's perfect. Especially since you're a musician, Trent."

Trent scratched his chin in thought.

"I dunno."

Quinn said "It's perfect. It's the kind of job where you can work without sacrificing your devotion to music."

Trent looked disinterested. Quinn channels her inner Helen.

"Trent, if you want to stay with us then the subject is NOT up for debate. We're going in there right now, young man."

Trent turned to Jim.

"Help?"

Jim said "Sorry, I'm with Quinn on this."

Trent let out a defeated sigh.

* * *

**Mirage, 2005...**

Trent had just gotten off of the phone with Jessie and was breaking the news to Max. Max reacts as expected.

"WHAT!?! JESSIE RAN OFF WITH A STRIPPER!?!"

Trent said "I'm afraid so."

Max threw his drumsticks across the room.

"SONOFABITCH!!!"

Trent said "Whoa, Max. Calm down, dude."

Max said "Calm down! CALM DOWN!?! HOW THE HELL CAN I CALM DOWN!?! THE SPIRAL'S DEAD MAN!!!"

Trent said "Dude, the dream's still alive. We just need a new guitarist and a bass player."

Max shouted "WAKE UP, DUDE! Nick was right, we're just gonna wind up townies playing sappy eighties love ballads at wedding gigs. I believed in the dream more than anyone and look where I am. I'm 29 with no job, no money, I live in a rat infested shit hole and my friends are all deserting me. We followed that rainbow and reached the end. It turns out that the pot of gold is really a bucket of piss. I can't take anymore and...and...I QUIT!!!"

With that, Max kicked his drum kit and stormed off. Trent looked thoughtful.

"The dream...over!?"

He hangs his head in sorrow.

* * *

**Act III**   
**Lawndale, 2007...**

Trent and Jim were waiting in the guitar store while Quinn sweet talks the manager.

Trent asked "Are you sure about this, man?"

Jim said "You know the affect Quinn has on people. That manager doesn't stand a chance. You're guaranteed to get that job."

Meanwhile, Quinn said "He's perfect. An experienced guitarist who knows the instrument inside and out. Also, he's my friend and it would mean so much to me if you'd hire him."

The manager, an aging hipster, said "Are you sure? I mean he seems kinda, I don't know, lethargic."

Quinn smiled suggestively and said "Please?"

The manager was now totally under her spell.

**A minute later...**

Quinn was giving Trent the good news.

Trent said "So, I have a job now?"

"You start on Monday" said Quinn.

Grinning, Jim said "Told ya."

Trent said "Um, Thanks, Quinn."

Quinn smiled, feeling very pleased with herself.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, morning...**

Quinn, Jim and their houseguest, Trent, were getting ready for work.

Trent complained "I can't believe I have to start this early."

"Don't worry," said Jim, "You get to sell guitars and meet up with people to start a band."

Quinn added "And besides, the hours are flexible enough that you can still find time to practice your music and get some gigs."

Trent said "It still kinda feels like selling out."

"You're not selling out," Quinn reassured, "You're making a smart investment in your future."

Trent was doubtful.

"Wish me luck. I'll need it."

With that, Trent left.

Once Trent was gone, Quinn said "God, I hope he doesn't screw this up."

**Later, at the guitar shop ...**

Trent was asleep at the sales counter.

* * *

 **Mirage, 2005...**  
 **Music:** "Mas Tequila" by Sammy Hagar

At a seedy night club Trent was alone on stage with his guitar. The crowd looks really rough. Trent plugs in to the amp and walks up to the microphone.

He said "Hello. I know you were expecting Mystic Spiral but over the past week my bandmates all quit on me. I'm Trent Lane and this song is called "Ow, My Face!"

Trent proceeded to play the song, but without drums, Jessie's guitar or a bass it sucks even worse than usual.

"I'm glad that you're happy, watching my pain  
Burning crop circles on my soul's razor plain  
We didn't have no love scene but you cut to the chase  
You're cutting off my nose just to spite my face."

He began the chorus. It sounds week without Jessie and Nick singing back up.

"OW! MY NOSE! OW! MY FACE!"

The crowd started to turn on Trent.

"HEY, YOU SUCK."

"GET OFF THE STAGE, LOSER."

Just then, someone threw a whiskey bottle on stage and it shattered at Trent's feet. Trent tried to finish the song but the crowd start throwing hot wings and eggs at him. He stops playing when a couple of the hot wings hit him in the face. Trent sighs and walks off the stage, his head hanging in shame.

* * *

**Lawndale, May, 2005...**

Trent walked up to Casa Lane with an acoustic guitar in his right hand, an electric guitar strapped to his back, a small bag with all his other possessions slung over his shoulder and a look of defeat on his face. He smiled as he realized that he's home. He rings the doorbell. A balding man in a wife beater and jeans answers.

"What do you want?"

Trent said "Who are you?"

The man said "I'm the guy who lives here."

Confused, Trent said "My parents took you in!? Cool."

"Hey, burn boy, whoever your parents are they're not here. Now get lost."

"But...but.."

The guy pulled out a shot gun.

"Get off my property."

Trent said "Dude, be cool! This is Vincent and Amanda Lane's house. I'm their son, Trent."

"I bought this house from them four years ago."

Trent's eyes went wide. Naturally, he didn't know that his parents sold the house once all five kids were gone.

"They sold the house after I left!?"

"That's right, pal. Now beat it."

Trent stood there in shock. Then, the guy fired a blast into the air as a warning.

"GIT!!!"

Trent ran away in terror, leaving all of his things behind in the process.

* * *

**Lawndale, 2007...**

At the guitar shop there was a long line at the checkout counter. Trent is asleep on the job again. The manager saw this and was pissed.

"Again."

He walked right up to the sleeping Trent and shook him awake. Trent woke up with a start.

"I swear, I never touched your daughter!"

Trent realizes where he is and calms down.

"Sorry."

The manager said "You've been here a whole week and all you do is sleep on the job. YOU'RE FIRED!"

Trent said "Aw, man."

* * *

**That evening at Quinn and Jim's apartment...**

Quinn, Jim and Trent were eating dinner and talking about their day.

Quinn said "...so I told him that he needed to change the color scheme of his business logo. Neon and pastel is so 1985."

She turned her attention to Trent.

"How's the job? You must be proud."

Trent said "I was fired for sleeping on the job today."

Both Jim and Quinn's eyes went wide.

Jim said "FIRED!?!"

Quinn said "SLEEPING ON THE JOB!?!"

Trent said "It was for the best. Selling guitars was just too hard. I'm sticking with what I know, playing music."

Quinn and Jim were absolutely livid. After all the help they gave him he managed to screw it all up by being his usual lazy-ass self.

"Dammit, Trent!" Quinn barked, "We've been going out of our way to help you and you blow it after just one week!?"

Just then, there was a knock on the door.

Jim said "I'll get it."

As he gets up to answer the door Quinn continues to scold Trent. She sounds more like a mother talking to an unruly child than a friend who's been let down.

"I'm very disappointed in you, young man. My boyfriend and I opened up our home to you and made every effort to help you out of the kindness of our hearts and you can't even try to hold down a part time job. What's wrong with you!?!"

**Meanwhile, at the door...**

Jim was standing before a guy in leather pants and an open vest with long, shaggy brown hair.

"Can I help you?" asked Jim.

"Dude," said the guy, "Trent here?"

Trent looked over and instantly recognized him.

"Jessie!?!"

"Yeah."

* * *

**Chez Pierre, the following evening...**

Quinn and Jim are having a romantic dinner to celebrate Trent's leaving.

Jim said "Thank God his former bandmate wanted to start over in New York after that stripper dumped him."

"No kidding," said Quinn, "I was ready to kill Trent when Jessie showed up to offer him a job and a place to live. At least he's not our problem anymore."

Jim looked guilty.

"Quinn, taking him in was my idea. I'm sorry I even suggested it."

"That's okay, honey," said Quinn, "You didn't know him like I do. But for future reference, the next time I warn you about someone I know please listen to me."

Jim said "Will do."

They smile at each other.

* * *

**A Brew Pub, Queens...**

Trent was at the bar. He's supposed to be serving drinks. Instead, he's sleeping.

**End.**


	10. Accept No Substitute

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Jake accidentally causes a teacher at Lawndale High to suffer a fatal heart attack Quinn is forced to fill in.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Accept No Substitute"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Lawndale High, day...**

The economics teacher, Mr. Keller (Ms. Bennett was fired for her role in Ms. Li's embezzlement), was lecturing the class. Mr. Keller was a balding 60 year old with a beer gut. He faced the class.

"Class, today we're taking a break from our lesson to hear about marketing in the real world. To that end allow me to introduce our special guest speaker, Jake Morgendorffer."

Jake entered the classroom and stood next to Mr. Keller.

Mr. Keller said "Mr. Morgendorffer is a marketing consultant. He runs a small firm alongside his daughter. He's here to tell us how marketing principles apply in today's business world."

Jake said "It's a pleasure to be here. Hey, kids,..." he dangled his tongue out of the side of his mouth, "...WAZZZUP!"

His failed attempt at being cool elicited no reaction save for a few snickers. Jake was embarrassed.

"C'mon, gang, I'm cool. I'm 'with it.'"

One student, who looks like a blond version of Sandi Griffin, said "Like, whatever. Geek."

Mr. Keller said "Now, Mandy..."

Jake said "Let me handle this."

He turned his attention to Mandy.

"Now, listen here, young lady..."

Mandy waved her hand dismissively.

"Whatever, loser."

Now, Jake got angry.

"Loser, LOSER!!! Oh, is being called that the story of my life. Ever since military school I was taunted for not being good. "Climb the rope, crybaby.""Men never quit." And then I was forced to EAT UNWASHED DRESS SOCKS ALL BECAUSE MY OLD MAN WANTED..."

Mr. Keller tried to calm him down.

"Now, Mr. Morgendorffer..."

Mandy threw a wad of paper at Jake. It hit him square in the eye.

"GAAAHHH! DAMMIT!!"

He tried to charge at her. Mr. Keller holds him back.

"Mr. Morgendorffer, please calm down."

Jake continued to rage.

"JUST LIKE THE SNOTTY LITTLE BITCH WHO STOOD ME UP FOR MR. CAMPUS HOT SHOT! GODDAMMIT!!!"

"MR. MORGENDORFFER, PLEASE!"

Just then, Mr. Keller goes pale and starts to sweat profusely. He clutches his chest.

"AAAHHH!!!! MY HEART!!!"

He collapses, which snaps Jake out of his rant and sends him into a full blown panic.

"GAH!!! WHAT'S THE NUMBER FOR 911!?!"

* * *

 **Outside the school, a short time later...**  
 **Music:** "Chopan's Death March"

Jake, the faculty and several students were watching Mr. Keller be loaded onto the ambulence. His heart attack was so severe that instead of putting him on a streatcher the paramedics placed him in a body bag. The current principal, Mr. DeMartino, is livid. He proceeds to chew Jake out.

"I can't BELIEVE you gave one of my best teachers a FATAL HEART ATTACK!"

Jake said "I didn't mean to kill him. It was an accident, I swear!"

"THAT'S WHY I'M NOT PRESSING CHARGES!"

Jake took a huge step back.

"EEP! Um...Let me make it up to you."

Mr. DeMartino said "And just HOW are you going to do THAT?"

* * *

**Morgendorffer and Daughter Consulting, later that day...**

Jake was in Quinn's office explaining the situation.

"WHAT!?!" said Quinn, "You volunteered me as a substitute teacher!?"

Jake said "I had to. It's my fault that the economics teacher died. It's just until Mr. DeMartino can hire a replacement."

"Dah-ad, I'm not qualified to teach classes."

"But you tutored Kevin during your senior year."

Quinn said "That's totally different. I was working one on one with a fellow student, not teaching a whole class."

Jake whined "But we need the publicity. It'll make up for me being the guy who killed a high school teacher."

Quinn said "Look, I can't. I don't know how to teach a class."

"Daria did it her senior year, during the teacher strike. How hard can it be?"

Quinn looked very apprehensive.

* * *

 **The next day at Lawndale High...**  
 **Music:** "Cry For Help" by Shinedown

Mr. DeMartino was talking to the economics class.

"Due to yesterday's unfortunate TRAGEDY, I need to find a new ECONOMICS TEACHER. In the MEANTIME I have a volunteer SUBSTITUTE. Say hello to your sub, Ms. Morgendorffer."

Quinn enterd the classroom and took her place in front of the class.

Mr. DeMartino said "They're all YOURS."

With that, he left. Quinn faces the class. She immediately sees four girls. One, Mandy, is the blonde who set Jake off the day before. The second, Alyssa, is a redhead who reminded Quinn of herself at that age. The third, Traci, is a brunette who's meek demeanor is reminiscent of Stacy in high school. The fourth, Stephanie, is a beautiful but dim witted asian a la Tiffany. All four are stylishly dressed.

Quinn thought _They must be the current equivalent of the Fashion Club._ Out loud, she said "Good morning, class. I'm your substitute, Ms. Morgendorffer."

One of the boys raised his hand.

"Yes, um..." Quinn looked at her seating chart "...Johnny?"

Johnny said "Ms. Morgendorffer, if you need help with anything let me know."

Another boy said "Can I be excused? I wanna get you a soda?"

Yet another boy said "Can I help? I really wanna help you, Ms. Morgendorffer."

Mandy was now staring daggers at Quinn.

Quinn said "That's real sweet of you guys, but what I really would like is for you to pay attention."

Mandy raised her hand.

"Yes?"

"Ms. Morgendorker, since you're only, like, the substitute can we just have our reading assignments?"

Quinn said "That's not how it works here."

Mandy defiantly folded her arms.

"Geek."

Quinn shot Mandy a dirty look. Every high school has a Sandi Griffin and Mandy's it.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, that evening...**

Quinn was telling Jim about her day.

"...so Mandy just kept being all bitchy while her three friends went along with it. It reminded me so much of the Fashion Club it made me sick. On top of that all of the guys in the class keep asking me out. It was my high school days all over again."

Jim said "If that was your high school experience consider yourself extremely lucky. At least you didn't get beat up by the quarterback for talking to his girlfriend."

Quinn said "The worst part is that I don't even know what I'm doing."

"I wish I could help but I know even less about this than you do."

Just then, Quinn got an idea.

"I need to make a phone call."

She gets up from the table and dials a number.

"Daria, it's Quinn. I need some advice."

* * *

**Act II**   
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Quinn was on the phone with Daria explaining the situation.

"...so I got roped into subing economics until a replacement can be hired."

Daria said "Talk about role reversal."

Quinn said "That's why I called you. You were in a similar situation during that teacher strike when we were in high school. I figured you could give me some tips."

Daria explained "When I was subbing for Mr. O'Neil's class I looked at the lesson plan, looked at the students and adjusted accordingly. The way to reach them is to speak of the material in a manner that makes it amusing and relatable. Does that make sense?"

Quinn looked thoughtful.

"Yes. I'm surprised you went to grad school instead of becoming a teacher."

"Please, I'm jaded enough without trying to teach a bunch of apes who'd rather play sports and dress up than do any actual learning."

Quinn couldn't help laughing at that one.

* * *

 **Lawndale High, the next day...**  
 **Music:** "Indestructable" by Disturbed

Quinn was lecturing the class.

"...so when a product reaches maturity that means demand is peaking. Think of it like a fad. A few people like it, it catches on, becomes super popular before finally getting old. A business cycle is basically the same thing."

She had the undivided attention of most of the class. The mean girl squad were another story. Mandy just sat there looking disdainful while Traci nervously followed her lead, visibly out of fear. Stephanie looked lost in a fog. Only Alyssa seems to be taking notes. Mandy notices this and is displeased.

Mandy said "Alyssa, are you actually taking notes?"

Nervous, Alyssa said "No, I'm just...well..." she thinks fast, "...pretending to take notes so the teacher thinks I'm paying attention."

"Who, like, cares what a teacher thinks? They're such losers."

Stephanie said "Yeeaahh...whaat...geeeks."

Shaking, Traci said "And so...geeky."

Mandy continued "Besides, what you should worry about is what your friends think. You don't want people to think you're a brain, do you?"

Alyssa said "Oh, Mandee, of course not. I just want to keep out of trouble."

Quinn overheard this and felt bad for Alyssa. _God, I remember having those exact same exchanges with Sandi._

One of the guys raised his hand. He's wearing a football jersey and has a goofy grin.

Quinn said "Yes?"

"Will you go to the prom with me?"

Quinn rolled her eyes. First the new Sandi Griffin, now the new Kevin Thompson.

* * *

**The hallway, later on...**

Quinn was on her way to the teachers lounge to have lunch. She passed by the mean girls.

Mandy said "...so I told him I'd never go out with a guy who has such a lousy car."

Alyssa said "God, I know! My date last night tried to take me to a chain restaurant. No Chez Pierre, no second date. That's what I told him."

The girls all laugh while Quinn looks more than a little guilty.

_God, was I really that terrible in high school? Mandy's a total bitch and the others are just acting shallow out of fear. I can't believe I let Sandi control me as long as I did._

Since the girls were obviously going to the cafeteria and the teacher's lounge is on the way there Quinn decided to eavesdrop. A guy walks by them. This guy is good looking but obviously not one of the popular kids. He seems to be a little on the brainy side. Alyssa gives him a look as he passed by. Quinn knew the look all too well.

_Oh, God! She has a thing for him._

Mandy noticed Alyssa looking at the brainy guy.

"Alyssa, were you just eyeing Andrew Farley?"

Thinking fast, Alyssa said "What? No, I was just amazed by what a fashion disaster he is."

"Well, be careful. What do you think would happen to your status if people thought you liked a brain?"

Alyssa said "EEEWWWWW!!!"

"Exactly."

Quinn stared daggers at Mandy. They enter the cafeteria. Quinn now feels sorry for Alyssa. Next, she enters the teacher's lounge and gasps. The football coach, Kevin Thompson, and the cheerleading coach, his wife Brittany, are making out hot and heavy. Quinn is disgusted by this.

"EEEEWWWW! Get a room, you two."

They stop making out.

Kevin said "Quinn! Sorry."

Brittany said "Come on, Kevy. Let's go to the girls locker room."

Kevin had a lecherous grin.

"Cool!"

They leave as Quinn shudders at the thought of what they plan to do.

* * *

**The next day in class...**

The bell has just rung and everyone is filing out. As soon as the shallow squad walks by Quinn stops them.

"Alyssa, could you stay a moment? I need to have a quick talk with you."

Alyssa turned to her friends.

Traci said "We'll save your seat at lunch."

Mandy added "Just don't take too long."

The others leave. It's just Quinn and Alyssa now.

Alyssa said "Could you, like, make it fast. I don't wanna be late."

Quinn said "I saw you taking notes yesterday. Can I see them?"

Alyssa looks like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Um...uh...I don't have them with me!"

Quinn obviously doesn't believe her. Alyssa lets out a defeated sigh.

"Fine. Don't tell anyone."

She hands Quinn the notes. Quinn goes over them and is visibly impressed. She hands them back.

"Alyssa, these are really good."

Alyssa said "Just don't tell anyone. Please!"

Quinn said "You're afraid people will think you're a brain and hate you for it, aren't you?"

Alyssa was stunned.

"H-How did you know that?"

Quinn said "Because I had the exact same issue when I was your age. I was smart but so obsessed with being attractive and popular that I pretended to be a shallow airhead. I didn't want people to think I was a brainy geek so I kept my true intelligence a closely guarded secret."

Alyssa asked "What changed?"

Quinn said "I started to realize I wasn't going to go anywhere in life by being like that. In junior year I started to let more of the real me show. Senior year I dropped the shallow airhead act altogether."

"And you became unpopular."

"Actually, no. It turned out that only one of my friends turned on me and she became unpopular. I stayed popular despite being a brain."

Alyssa gasped in disbelief.

"T-The friend who deserted you?"

Quinn said "She eventually came around and we became friends again. We're still friends today. Look, I just felt you needed to hear what I just told you. Think about it. Okay?"

Alyssa looks uncertain.

* * *

**The cafeteria, a short time later...**

The shallow girls were eating salads when they are approached by Andrew.

Mandy said "What do you want, loser?"

Nervous, Andrew ignored her and talked to Alyssa.

"Um...Alyssa, you see...well...I was wondering if...you know..."

Alyssa said "Are you asking me out?"

Andrew nods in the affirmative. Alyssa sees the disapproving look on her friends faces.

She said "EEEWWWWWW!!! No way! I'd never go out with a geek like you."

All four girls laugh. Andrew walks away, humiliated. The other three are too busy laughing to notice the guilty expression on Alyssa's face.

* * *

**The economics classroom, after school...**

Quinn was getting ready to leave when the door opens. She looks up. It's Alyssa, and she looks both sad and a little lost.

"Ms. Morgendorffer, I need your advice."

Quinn is pleasantly surprised.

* * *

 **Act III**  
 **Lawndale High, afternoon...**  
 **Music:** "High School Never Ends" by Bowling For Soup

School has let out and Quinn was listening to Alyssa talk about her problem.

Alyssa said "...so when I asked him out I shot him down in the cruelest way I could just to save face and I feel really bad about it. I don't know what to do?"

Quinn listened patiently. Alyssa reminded her so much of herself.

It was really the same thing with us in the Fashion Club. We were so concerned with our popularity that we were cruel to people who really didn't deserve it. I wish I could go back in time and give my teenage self a hard kick in the ass. I also wish I could find some of the people I was mean to and apologize.

Alyssa said "Ms. Morgendorffer, are you even listening to me?"

Quinn said "Yes, I was just thinking about how I used to be like you and your friends. We were really bitchy and full of ourselves back then."

"That's why I figured I could talk to you. You will keep this a secret, won't you?"

Quinn smiled.

"I won't tell if you don't."

Alyssa is now visibly relieved.

Quinn said "Alyssa, how do you really feel about thic guy?"

"I like him. He may not be rich or popular, but he's smart and still kind of cute."

Quinn said "I had a similar experience when I was sixteen. Over the summer I got a tutor because of my low PSAT score. I discovered I actually like learning. I also developed a huge crush on him."

Alyssa asked "What happened?"

"During our final session I asked him out. He said no and told me he only dates girls who have depth. It was my first tast of heartbreak."

Alyssa asked "What should I do?"

"Well, you like him and he obviously likes you. First, you need to apologize for being so mean. Then, I think you should ask him out."

Alyssa's jaw dropped.

"What!?! I can't date a brain."

Quinn said "If you like him that shouldn't even matter."

Alyssa asked "But what about my status? What if all of my friends stop liking me because I date a brain?"

Quinn said "If they're really your friends they'll accept it. If they turn on you they were never your friends to begin with."

Quinn now looked regretful.

"I just wish I'd understood that sooner."

Alyssa thinks it over.

* * *

**The girls locker room...**

Mandy was getting some things out of her locker when she heard a noise.

"EEEEEEEEEE!!!"

Seized by curiosity, she walked in the direction of the sound. She rounds the corner and gasps in shock.

Kevin: "ugh...ugh...babe...so...hot..."

Brittany: "OH...Kevy...yes...Yes...YES...YEESSSS..."

Mandy: "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!"

**Mr. DeMartino's office, a short time later...**

Kevin and Brittany were getting their asses chewed for doing it in the locker room.

Mr. DeMartion said "I assumed you were AWARE that copulating on school grounds is STRICTLY PROHIBITED!!!"

Brittany said "I'm sorry, Mr. DeMartino. We didn't know."

Kevin asked "What's the big deal, Mr. D? Me and Brit are married."

"You were spotted by a minor who REPORTED you to me!"

Mr. DeMartino now grins.

"Although I should probably THANK you for your INDISCRETION. I now have a chance to RID myself of you, KEVIN."

Kevin doesn't get it.

"Like, what do you mean, Mr. D?"

DeMartino continues to grin.

"YOU'RE FIRED!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

"AW, MAN!!!"

* * *

**Lawndale High, the next day...**

Mandy, Alyssa, Traci and Stephanie were walking to class. Mandy was telling them what happened.

"...it was, like, sooo gross!"

Traci said "Ewww!"

Stephanie said "Sooo...grooooosssssssss."

At this point, Alyssa saw Andrew at his locker. He looks totally dejected.

She said "I forgot something. I'll see you guys in class."

The other girls seem to accept this and continue on their way. Alyssa walks up to Andrew.

He asked "What? You wanna make fun of me again?"

Alyssa said "No, I wanna apologize. I was a real bitch to you yesterday. I'm sorry."

Andrew said nothing.

Alyssa went on "I've also been thinking about you asking me out. I've changed my mind. I'd love to go out with you sometime."

Andrew was skeptical.

"Is this some kind of trick?"

Alyssa said "I deserve that. The truth is I like you, as in like like you. I just didn't wanna admit it. I was afraid my friends would turn on me if I said yes when you asked me out. I wanted to say yes, I just didn't have the guts to do it."

Andrew asked "What changed your mind?"

Alyssa said "I felt so bad about shooting you down that I talked to...a friend about it. She told me that if I like you I should take a chance with you. My friends will just have to get used to it."

Andrew appeard to think it over. He finally decided.

"Alyssa, would you like to see a movie with me this weekend?"

"I'd love to."

Andrew smiled.

* * *

**Economics class...**

Quinn has just handed them back the test they took the day before. Mandy sees her grade.

"A D-!"

Alyssa looks at her score. She got an A+. Mandy snatched her test.

"HEY!"

"Well, well. Alyssa got an A. Are you turning into a brain?"

Alyssa looks uncertain. Quinn gives her an encouraging look.

Alyssa said "So what if I am? Maybe I'm sick of being shallow and stuck up."

Mandy was visibly taken aback.

Alyssa said "I'm tired of you bossing all three of us around. I won't put up with it anymore. And for you information, I have a date with Andrew Farley this weekend."

Mandy said "So, a brain dating a brain. I guess you don't want to hang out with us anymore." she turns to the other two, "Right, girls."

Traci said "Actually, I'm siding with Alyssa. I'm sick of being bossed around, too."

Stephanie said "Meee...tooooo."

Mandy was totally taken aback. Quinn and Alyssa exchange proud smiles. Just then, Mr. DeMartino enters the classroom.

"Ms. Morgendorffer, I have good NEWS. This is your LAST day in PURGATORY. I've hired a permanent economics teacher."

With that, he leaves.

Alyssa said "Ms. Morgendorffer."

"Yes?"

"I just wanted to say that you were a great teacher."

"Thanks. Most of you are great students. You know who you are."

Alyssa thought _Thanks, Ms. Morgendorffer._

Quinn thought _I'm proud of you, Alyssa._

* * *

**Pizza King, that evening...**

Quinn and Stacy were catching up. Even though it's a teen hang out the familiarity keeps the now grown Quinn and Stacy coming back.

Stacy said "So, you had students who were like us in our Fashion Club days."

Quinn said "I'm just glad I got through to one of them in the end. I wish I had the kind of advice I gave Alyssa."

"At least she's embracing her true self now."

Quinn thinks of something else.

"Kevin's out of a job."

Stacy said "Again! What happened?"

Quinn said "He was caught having sex with Brittany in the girls locker room."

"Ewww! Though I can't say I'm surprised. Those two never were good at keeping it in their pants."

"Tell me about it."

**End.**


	11. Temptation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim has a sexy new coworker who wants him. Can he resist, or will he cheat on Quinn?

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally beserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Temptation"**   
**story by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Pizza King, afternoon...**

Quinn, Stacy, Sandi and Tiffany are having a girls afternoon out. The current topic of conversation is their relationships.

Sandi said "So finally, Joey told the guy to go cry to his mother. He stopped pestering us after that."

Stacy said "Guess he was too dense to know that "I have a boyfriend" means "no"."

Quinn said "Tell me about it. One of my clients has a teenage son who actually e-mailed me a marriage proposal. I was like 'Even if I were single you're still too young'. Being attractive can be a curse sometimes."

Tiffany said "Yeeaahhh...aaa...currrssse."

Stacy said "Guys still hit on me all the time too. Sometimes they keep it up even after I show them my ring. Of course, they do back off when I threaten to file a complaint."

Quinn said "Some of the guys who come on to me are real hot too. If I were single I'd actually consider it."

Sandi asked "Why don't you?"

"Because I love Jim and would never do that to him."

Quinn suddenly had a thought.

"Would you do that to Joey?"

Sandi said "No. If I found a guy I was more interested in I'd at least have the decency to break up with Joey first."

* * *

  
**Rowe Automotive, the following morning...**

Jim and Adam have been summoned into John Rowe's office.

John said "Boys, I wanted to see you because I've just hired another mechanic."

Jim said "You need us to show him the ropes?"

"Basically."

Adam said "You can count on us, Dad."

Just then, the door opens. The new hire is not a he but a she. She's a raven haired latina beauty with brown eyes, a perfect face and the body of a supermodel. Jim is visibly taken by her looks.

John said "I'd like you boys to meet Jessica Sanchez. Jessica, these are your new coworkers. My son, Adam."

Jessica and Adam shake hands.

"Pleased to meet you, Adam."

"Pleasure's all mine, Jessica."

John said "And this is Jim Carbone."

She now shakes Jim's hand.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Carbone."

Jim thought _Damn, she's beautiful_ as words escape him. Jessica giggled.

She said "What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?"

Jim thought _And she has a carefree sense of humor. If only I was single._

Nervous, he said "Um...well...Call me Jim, Miss Sanchez."

Jessica said "Please, call me Jessica." as she thought _He's cute._

Jim said "Sorry I kinda spaced out just now."

"That's okay. I guess you didn't expect a woman."

Jim thought _Great, she thinks I'm sexist._

Jessica smiled reassuringly as she said "Don't worry, Jim. I'm sure we'll be great friends." _And maybe even more, handsome._

* * *

  
**Later, in the garage...**

Jim was showing Jessica how to inspect a car.

"...so now that I've gone over everything twice it's time to make my final appraisal. There's nothing wrong with this car so once I've lowered it I can place the decal that states the car passes inspection."

Jim is about to lower the hydraulic press when Jessica notices something.

"Jim," she said, "I think you missed something."

Jim said "I doubt it. I was very thorough."

"Jim, trust me."

Jim decided to give her the benefit of the doubt. He walked over to Jessica as she shined a flashlight under the car.

Jessica said "I was right. Have a look."

Jim looks at the part of the engine that Jessica is shining the light on. He sees a small crack that has oil leaking out of it very slowly.

Jessica said "This car has a slow leak."

Jim said "You're right. I can't believe I missed that."

"Don't be too hard on yourself. It's so small even a seasoned professional could easily miss it."

Jim thought _Beautiful, smart and nice. She's the whole package. If I were single I'd ask her out in a heartbeat. In fact, she's even more attractive than..._

Jim immediately shook his head.

_Definitely didn't like where that train of thought was heading._

He said "Thanks, Jessica. I'm lucky to have you around."

_I did not just say that!_

Jessica said "Thanks, Jim. You're sweet."

Jim blushed. Jessica noticed but said nothing.

* * *

  
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, that evening...**

Quinn was telling Jim about her day.

"...so I told him that with sites like travelocity it would be best for his travel agency to go digital and he agreed. So, how was your day?"

Jim said "We have a new mechanic who started. Her name's Jessica."

Quinn said "That sounds interesting. How'd she do on her first day?"

"She was great," said Jim, sounding more excited than he'd meant, "When we inspected a car she noticed something that I completely overlooked. I was impressed, and a little embarrassed."

"I can imagine. What's she like?"

Jim said "You'd like her. She's beautiful, smart, funny and very nice. You two would get along well."

"I see" said Quinn with a note of jealousy in her voice.

Jim failed to notice the jealous tone.

"Jessica's incredible. I can't believe she's as good at the job as she is. We're definetly going to be good friends."

"Just friends."

Now Jim notices the jealousy in Quinn's voice. He tries to reassure her.

"Don't worry, Quinn. I'm happy with you. I don't plan to trade up."

Quinn folded her arms and scowled.

"Trade up!?"

The harsh tone caused Jim to realize that he just put a lot of foot in his mouth.

"Sorry, that didn't come out right."

Quinn was now visibly fuming. Jim gulped as he realized that he may well have to sleep on the couch tonight. Storm walked up to Quinn and nudged her. Quinn pets the dog and reassures him.

"No, Storm, Mommy's not mad at you." _Just Jim._

* * *

  
 **Rowe Automotive, the next day...**  
 **Music:** "Hey Jealousy" by the Gin Blossoms

Jim was at the register ringing up a sale. The customer is a middle aged man with a beer gut.

Jim said "Here you go."

The customer takes his recept.

Jim said "Have a nice day."

The customer said "You too."

With that, he left. Quinn came in a few seconds later.

Pleasantly surprised, Jim said "Quinn, what brings you here?"

Quinn said "I wanted to apologize for getting crazy jealous last night."

"Don't worry about it," Jim replied, "At least you didn't make me sleep on the couch."

Quinn went on "So, have you taken your lunch break yet?"

Jim said "No. Why?"

Quinn said "There's this new Mexican restaurant I wanna try. I hear it's really good."

Jim said "Count me in."

At this point, Jessica came in.

"Hey, Jim."

Jim blushed, which Quinn noticed.

He said "Hey, Jess."

Jessica sees Quinn.

"Can I help you, ma'am?"

Quinn thought _Ma'am! I do NOT look that old!_

Jim said "Oh, she's not a customer."

Jessica looks curious.

Quinn said "I'm Quinn, Jim's girlfriend. His live in girlfriend."

"Charmed." Jessice then proceeded to ignore Quinn while speaking to Jim. "So, Jim, what were you guys just talking about?"

Jim was about to answer when Quinn interrupted.

"I wanted to take him to lunch at DeSanta's, that new Mexican place that just opened up."

Jim asked "Do you know anything about it, Jess?"

Quinn was miffed that Jim's paying more attention to Jessica than her.

Jessica said "No, but being Mexican myself I might try it. See if it meets my high standards. Mind if I tag along?"

Quinn said "Nothing personal, but..."

Jim said "We'd love to have you along."

Quinn doesn't know who to be more pissed off at: Jim or Jessica.

* * *

  
**DeSanta's Mexican Restaurant, a short time later...**

The restaurant has decor reminiscent of a cantina in a low budget western. At a booth Quinn and Jim were seated next to each other while Jessica sits across from Jim. Quinn does not look happy.

Jim said "So, Jess, what do you think?"

Jessica said "Not bad. You should come to my place sometime. I make a mean enchalada."

"I just might do that."

Quinn said "You mean WE just might do that!"

Jim said "Of coure." _Note to self: you already have a girlfriend._

Jessica asked "So, Jim, how did you become a mechanic?"

Jim explained "I used to work at Grace, Sloan and Paige, but I quit. Mack was a friend of mine from college so he helped me find a new job."

Jessica was a little surprised.

"You quit a high profile job to be a mechanic?"

Upset that Jim's clearly into Jessica, Quinn said "No, he quit a high profile job to be with me."

Jim explained "I took a promotion that forced me to move to Japan. I only stayed a week because being away from Quinn hurt too much. That's how much I loved her." He suddenly noticed his brain fart. _I just used love in past tense! Dammit!_

Now feeling VERY threatened, Quinn said "And you still love me, right?"

"Of course." I love Quinn, but I have a crush on Jessica. I need help!

Jessica said "That's so romantic. I wish I had a man like that."

Jim, sounding a little too friendly, said "You'll find him, I know it."

Under the table Quinn started to rub her foot against Jim's leg in a desperate attempt to keep his attention.

Jessica said "I hope so" while thinking _I already have, but his girlfriend is right here with us. Still, I can tell he's interested. Maybe I can change his mind about Quinn._

Under the table Jessica started to rub her foot against Jim's other leg. Jim now feels extremely awkward. He feels less awkward when Jessica smiles suggestively at him. Jim loses himself in Jessica's sexy smile and forgets all about Quinn.

He thought _God, Jessica's sexy. I can't help it, I want her._

Quinn saw the way Jessica was looking at Jim.

_You...you SLUT!!!_

She fantasized about clawing Jessica's face off.

* * *

  
 **Nicole's place, later that day...**  
 **Music:** "Crazy Possessive"

_Call my man again_

_An' I'm'a fuck you up_

_I'm gonna fuck you up_

_I'm gonna fuck you up_

Over coffee, Quinn explains the situation to Nicole.

"...so now I don't know what to do. I can tell she wants Jim and he's definitely attracted to her."

Nicole said "Just because he's attracted to another woman doesn't mean he'll actually act on it. After all, Jim's not the only man you find attractive."

Quinn ponders this for a moment.

"True, but I'll never act on it. I love Jim too much to hurt him like that."

"So what makes you think he'd do it to you?"

Quinn said "Nicole, you didn't see the way they were looking at each other at lunch. He has a crush on her, I know it."

Nicole said "Jim doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who's a slave to his sexual urges. Believe me, after my experience back in high school I can smell a cheater a mile away. Jim definitely loves you too much to betray you."

"Has he ever really been put to the test?" asked Quinn. "I'm afraid Jessica will turn up the heat to the point where Jim won't be able to resist, no matter how much he loves me."

Nicole said "I think you're underestimating him."

Quinn said "I hope so."

At this point Nicole got an idea.

"How about a girls evening out?"

Quinn asked "What do you mean?"

Nicole said "I mean you, me and Jessica. As a neuteral party I can feel Jessica out and determine whether or not you should be worried."

Quinn thinks about it for a second.

"Nicole, that's a great idea!"

* * *

  
**Rowe Automotive, Friday...**

Jessica has just finished working on a car and closes the hood. Adam comes in from the front shop.

"Jessica, you have a visitor."

"Be right there."

A short time later she's at the front shop. Her visitor was Quinn.

Quinn said "Jessica, I wanna apologize if I gave off a jealous vibe the other day at lunch."

Jessica said "That's alright, Quinn. If Jim were my boyfriend and you were his new female coworker I'd feel a little threatened. Don't worry, he's your man." For now, won't be long until he's mine.

Quinn said "I also wanted to bury the hatchet by inviting you on a girls night out tonight. You, me and my friend Lindy. We could have dinner and then catch a movie. You interested." _You won't steal my guy, you whore._

Jessica said "Sounds fun." _First rule of war: know your enemy._

The two girls exchange insincere smiles.

* * *

  
**Playhouse 99 movie theater, that evening...**

Quinn, Nicole and Jessica were in line for tickets.

Nicole said "So, Jessica, having fun so far?"

"Of course. Dinner was nice and I've been wanting to see My Heart Beats for Two. I'm a sucker for romantic drama. I mean, a movie about a guy trapped in a loveless relationship until another woman who really cares for him is totally my thing."

Quinn, in a catty tone, said "Really. Who would've thought?"

Jessica thought _I deserve him more than you, you diva._

Quinn thought _He's mine. Get your own guy._

Nicole can sense the tension and is visibly uncomfortable.

  
**Two hours later...**

The three women have just exited the auditorium.

Quinn said "That was so sad how that movie ended."

Jessica said "I disagree."

Quinn said "It's sad because he left his wife for the other woman."

Jessica said "But they were wrong for each other. He was married to the wrong woman but left her to be with the right one. His wife didn't love him but the other woman did."

Menacingly, Quinn said "His wife was still hurt by it."

Jessica rolled her eyes.

"I have to use the restroom real quick."

Nicole saw her opportunity.

"Me too. I'll come with."

Quinn said "I'll see you guys by the car."

* * *

**The ladies room, a short time later...**

Once in the ladies restroom Nicole and Jessica get to talking.

Jessica asked "What do you think of her boyfriend?"

Nicole said "Jim's a great guy. He's smart, funny, kind and very loyal. He and Quinn really do love each other."

"I only ask because I think he has a thing for me..." and I have a thing for him, "...and I worry that it might cause problems."

"He's devoted to Quinn," said Nicole, "He'd never hurt her."

Jessica said "I just worry he might try something. I don't wanna be a homewrecker."

Nicole patiently explained "Any attraction he may have to you is purely physical and will probably fizzle out before too long."

Jessica said "I hope so." _Not!_

Nicole knew she was lying.

"You like him, don't you?"

Jessica sheepishly admitted "Um...Yeah. I know he's with Quinn, but I can't help it. It's like Jim and I are irresistably drawn to each other."

Now, Nicole's worried.

* * *

  
**Later that evening...**

Nicole has just dropped off Jessica at her place and is now driving Quinn home.

Quinn asked "What do you think of her, Nicole?"

Nicole got right to the point.

"Quinn, do NOT leave Jim alone with that woman! She wants him and is determined to get him."

Quinn asked "You don't think Jim would actually cheat on me with her, do you?"

"She'll pounce on him first chance she gets," said Nicole, "And I don't think Jim will be able to resist the temptation."

Quinn said "Now you see why I'm so concerned."

Nicole said "And based on what I've heard from both you and Jessica he's falling for her despite himself. He might not be able to resist if she throws herself at him hard enough."

"You think she would."

"Quinn, I got the distinct impression that she's bound and determined to steal Jim away from you."

Now, Quinn's worried.

* * *

  
 **Rowe Automotive, Monday...**  
 **Music:** "Tempted"   
_Tempted by the fruit of another_  
 _Tempted, but the truth is discovered_

Jim was in the lounge having lunch. He's also deep in thought.

_I have a mini-crush on Jessica, but I've only known her a week. I've been with Quinn for almost two years and I can't imagine being without her. The problem is that everytime I see Jessica I seem to lose all common sense. Jessica's beautiful, smart and nice but so's Quinn._

Jim takes a swig of his soda.

_Why can't I just be attracted to Quinn, and only Quinn? Why does this have to be so complicated? Jessica is damn near irresistible and I know she wants me. On the other hand Quinn is always there for me. I have everything I ever wanted in a relationship with her. I know she'd never hurt me. I can't say the same for Jessica. She seems nice and we have a lot in common, but we don't know each other well enough for her to get me like Quinn does._

Jim's eyes go wide as he has an epiphany.

_Of course! These feelings I'm having for Jessica mean nothing. I don't know her well enough to know if a relationship with her would work. This is just a physical attraction. I'm only interested in Jessica because of her obvious sex appeal. Quinn has sex appeal, too, but she's also someone who's always been there for me. I can't throw that away just because I get turned on by someone else._

Jim was satisfyed that he's gotten a handle on this. Just then, Jessica came in.

"Hey, Jim" she said in a sultry tone.

"Hey, Jess."

Jessica sat down next to him. "I need to ask a small favor."

"Okay."

Jessica said "My car wouldn't start this morning so I had to call a hauler to bring it here and use my employee discount. The problem is we won't have the new starter in until tomorrow. Could you give me a ride home?"

She gave Jim that seductive smile of hers.

"Please."

Jim said "Sure."

"Thanks, you're a life saver."

She kissed him on the cheek and leaves.

_Aw, crap!_

* * *

  
**That evening...**

Jim and Jessica arrived at her apartment complex. Jim parks his car.

Jessica said "Thanks, Jim."

"No problem."

Jessica asked "Would you like to come in?"

Jim said "Tempted, but Quinn's waiting for me at home."

Jessica said "You don't have to stay long. I just want to thank you by giving you a drink." And getting you in my bed.

Jim thought I really shouldn't.

Jessica noticed the hesitation.

"Just a drink, Jim. I'm not gonna keep you away from your woman." Because I'll be your woman tonight.

Jim looks doubtful.

* * *

  
**A few minutes later...**

Jessica and Jim enter her apartment. It's a one bedroom with a kitchen/living room in the front.

Jim said "Nice place" while thinking What am I doing here?

Jessica said "Thanks. Make yourself at home while I change into something more comfortable."

"Alright."

As Jessica went into her bedroom Jim sat on the couch.

_Just a thank you drink, that's all. If she tries anything I'm out of here._

Jessica emerged from her bedroom. She's wearing a form fitting dress with shoulder straps and a low V-neck that shows ample cleavage. The dress was so tight that Jim could tell that Jessica wasn't wearing a bra as he could see the outline of her nipples. The hem of the skirt was so high as to show a little too much leg and if Jessica were to sit down or bend over her panties would be readily visible. The ensemble is completed with high heel sandals.

"What's with the dress?" asked a very turned on Jim.

Jessica said "I like to dress this way after work, that's all." _And it's a lot less that you'll have to take off, sexy._

Jim said "Okay. I just hope you're not trying to seduce me." _I can't believe I just said that._

Smiling, Jessica said "Well, how do you like your whiskey?"

"On the rocks."

Jessica walked to the liqor cabinet. Jim couldn't help staring at her ass.

* * *

  
**An hour later...**

Jim and Jessica were having light hearted conversation over the drinks.

Jessica laughed "You're kidding."

Jim said "No, he really did think you could put out a fire with alcohol."

"So Kevin actually burned down his own house. How can anyone be so stupid?"

"Beats me."

Jim looked at his watch.

"I'd better get going."

This was when Jessica moved in for the kill.

"Jim, are you sure you're okay to drive? You've had two whiskeys on the rocks."

"I have to get home," said Jim, "Quinn's waiting for me."

"You know," Jessica said in a sultry tone, "You could stay the night. I'm sure Quinn would rather you do that than drive after drinking."

It was now obvious to Jim that she IS trying to seduce him.

He said "Jessica, Quinn might think something's going on if I don't come home."

Jessica said "So, tell her you had to stay at a friend's house. I'll help cover for you."

Jim couldn't tell if she was joking or serious.

"I...I appreciate the offer, but I really need to go."

He was about to leave when Jessica said "Before you go I have one question."

Nervous, Jim said "Okay."

"Do you think I'm pretty?" she asked in a tone so sultry that Jim lost all common sense.

"You're beautiful, Jessica" he said without thinking.

She leaned in close and spoke in an erotic tone.

"Thanks. I like you. A lot."

Jim thought _Oh, man. This is not good!_

Jessica leaned in some more.

"I...I want you to stay."

Their faces are now inches apart.

"You can sleep in my bed."

Jim started to lean, too caught up in the moment to think.

"I want you," Jessica huskily whispered. Their lips were almost touching when she said "Take me...lover."

They are about to kiss when...

"No."

Jim pulled away from her.

Jessica said "Come on, Jim. You want me and I want you. Why fight it?"

"Because I have a girlfriend" Jim reminded both her and himself.

Jessica said "But we click so well together."

She lowered one of the shoulder straps on her dress.

"Come on, Jim. You know you want to."

Jim nervously said "Yeah, but we can't."

Jessica immediately pounced on top of Jim and kissed him passionately, moaning into his mouth as she does. Jessica began to grind against him.

"Mmmmm...mmm...MMM...MMPH...UMPH..."

Jim's eyes suddenly went wide.

_I CAN'T!_

He shoved her off of him and put as much distance between them as possible.

"Dammit, Jessica! What part of no don't you understand?"

Jessica said "Jim, Quinn doesn't need to know."

Jim said "That's not the point. I love Quinn and I'm not cheating on her. I could give in to your advances and we wind up naked in your bed but I'd feel like shit afterwards. Even if Quinn never found out the guilt would still tear me up inside. And if she did find out she'd be devastated. Look, Jessica, I think you're hot and I'm definetly tempted to hook up with you, but that's just not gonna happen. I love Quinn too much to do that to her."

"But...but..."

Jessica tried to pounce again but Jim got out of the way this time. He stood up and turned toward the door.

"Jim" Jessica said.

Against his better judgment he turned around. Jessica sat on the couch smiling suggestively at him.

"Come on," she said in a sultry voice as she raised the hem of the skirt, showing Jim her lacy thong pantines, "You know you want this."

Jim turned and left without another word.

Folding her arms, Jessica said "So close! Dammit!"

* * *

  
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, a short time later...**

Quinn was waiting up for Jim when he came in. He had a very serious look on his face.

She asked "Where were you?"

He sat down next to her on the couch.

"Jessica had car trouble so I gave her a ride home."

Quinn eyes Jim with great suspicion.

"Really?"

Jim said "She invited me up. Like an idiot I said yes. She said she just wanted to make me a drink as a thank you."

Quinn gasped.

Jim said "I didn't do anything. She tried to get me to sleep with her, but I didn't."

Quinn asked "Did you kiss her?"

"No, she kissed me, hard. I came dangerously close to giving in, but then I thought about you, so I pulled away and told her that I wasn't going to hook up with her. I left after that."

Quinn said "So, she made a move and you resisted?"

"Yes."

Quinn got up and walked to the phone.

Jim asked "What are you doing?"

"Calling Jessica. I want her side of the story."

Quinn dials the number.

"Hello, Jessica, it's Quinn. Jim just told me he was at your place."

On her end of the line Jessica said "He was."

Quinn said "He says you tried to seduce him but he rejected your advances."

"Unfortunately," Jessica admitted, "I thought I could steal him from you but he's just too damn hung up on you for that to happen. You really are a lucky woman, Quinn. Even me pouncing on him in a slutty dress wasn't enough to make him stray. He shoved me right off when I did that."

Quinn puts her hand on the reciever and turns to Jim.

"She says she pounced on you and kissed you but you shoved her off."

Looking Quinn in the eye, Jim said "That's exactly what happened. I told her that I loved you and there was no way I was cheating on you."

Quinn could see that he's telling the truth. She gets back on the phone.

She said "Jessica, he just confirmed your story."

Jessica said "Don't worry, it won't happen again. If this didn't get him to choose me over you then nothing will. I'm backing off."

Quinn said "Good, because if you touch him again I'll mess you up so bad you'll need reconstructive surgery."

With that, Quinn hangs up. She turns to Jim and sits next to him on the couch.

Music: "I'll Stand by You" by The Pretenders

Quinn said "I'm sorry I doubted you, Jim."

Jim said "Quinn, I love you, and only you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. When I'm having a good day being with you makes it even better. When I'm having a bad day you make it feel like all my problems go away when I'm with you. I've never been as happy as I am with you. You get me like no one else does. I'm not throwing all that away for a hot piece of tail. I love you so much that when you're hurt it hurts me. I made my choice: you."

Tears of joy fill Quinn's eyes.

"Oh, Jim!"

She throws her arms around him and they kiss.

_I'll stand by you_   
_I'll stand by you_   
_Won't let nobody hurt you_   
_I'll stand by you_

**End.**


	12. A Soldier's Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie White, having just gotten out of the Army, returns to Lawndale. Unfortunately, leaving the war behind proves to be more difficult than he'd imagined.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally berserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"A Soldier's Return"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Cashman's, afternoon...**

Sandi was doing some clothes shopping. Her boyfriend, Joey, was with her and loaded down with stuff. He was not happy.

"Sandi," Joey said in a whiny voice, "Do you really need this much stuff?"

Sandi rolled her eyes.

"Yes, and why are you complaining? You did this for Quinn all the time back in high school."

"That was different" Joey protested.

"How so?" asked Sandi.

"One," said Joey, "I was hoping to get Quinn but I already have you. Two, I had Jeffy and Jamie to help me out but this time I'm doing it all myself."

Sandi said "Joey, this isn't just how you get the girl but how you keep her as well. Jim never complains when he does this for Quinn. In fact, he does it for ALL of us whenever she asks him to."

Joey said "I'm not Jim. He's a glutton for punishment."

"No," said Sandi, "He loves Quinn. You do love me, don't you, Joey?"

"You know I do," said Joey, "I just don't see why you need so much stuff."

Rolling her eyes again, Sandi said "You really don't get it, do you?"

Before the discussion can escalate into an argument the couple are interrupted by a very familiar voice.

"Joey? Sandi? Is that really you!?"

Joey and Sandi both turned around to find a man their age with blonde hair cut in a military buzz wearing an Army BDU (battle dress uniform) and carrying a few shopping bags of his own. Even with the different hairstyle and clothes, though, both Sandi and Joey recognize him from his face and voice.

"Jamie!?!" said Joey in astonishment.

"Jamie White!?!" exclaimed an equally astonished Sandi.

"Hey, guys" said Jamie, visibly happy to have run into some old friends.

Joey walked up to his old buddy and excitedly shook his hand.

"Jamie, man, I haven't seen you since you told me you enlisted six years ago!"

"What are you doing here?" Sandi asked.

Jamie said "I just got out. I decided to do some clothes shopping since my civvies haven't been worn since my one semester at Lawndale State. So, what's with you guys?"

Beaming, Sandi said "Joey and I are a couple now."

"That's cool" said Jamie, "How'd you get together?"

"We hooked up at a party last Halloween" Joey answered.

"We've been steady since then" added Sandi.

* * *

  
**Pizza King, that evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having pizza with Sandi and Joey. It was a double date.

Sandi said "You guys won't believe who Joey and I ran into today."

"Who?" asked Quinn.

Joey said "Jamie White."

Jim asked "Who's he?"

"One of the three guys who had a crush on me in high school," Quinn explained, "He's the one I took to prom. Last I heard he joined the Army."

Joey said "He just got out. He's back in Lawndale now."

"Apparently," Sandi added, "He's planning to stay. In fall he's gonna go back to college on the GI Bill."

"That's cool" said Jim.

Quinn suddenly became nervous as she remembered the Jeffy incident.

"Um, Sandi..."

"Relax, Quinn," said Sandi, "I don't think he's still crushing on you."

Added Joey "In fact, you didn't even come up."

Quinn was visibly relieved to hear this.

Jim asked "So, he doesn't know about that, or that Jeffy's now locked away in a mental institute?"

"I don't think so" said Sandi.

Joey said "I'm not sure I'm gonna tell him...unless it comes up."

* * *

  
 **Meanwhile, at the Liquid Dinner...**  
 **Music:** "Shut Up and Drive" by Rihanna

Jamie was seated at the bar nursing a beer. He had a sudden realization.

` _The last time I was here I needed a fake ID. Now, I was able to get the first one on the house just by showing up in uniform._

At this point, Mr. DeMartino sat at the next stool. The bar tender approached.

"What'll it be, pal?"

"A beer, on TAP."

"You got it, pal."

Jamie instantly recognized him.

"Mr. DeMartino."

DeMartino looked at him.

"Do I know you?"

Jamie said "Jamie White, a former student."

"I see," said DeMartino, "Are you going to SWEET talk me by PRETENDING to be in the ARMY!?"

Nervous, Jamie said "No, I just got out. Just saying hi."

"Sorry," said DeMartino, "I just remember YOU being a very MEDIOCRE student."

"Yeah," Jamie admitted, "Army life kinda got me to appreciate what you were trying to accomplish with us and understand some of your frustration. If I could do it again I'd actually try."

DeMartino appreciates the thought.

"So, Jamie, have you BEEN anywhere INSTERESTING?"

Jamie answered "One deployment to Afghanistan and I recently came back from my third deployment to Iraq. I was just honorably discharged."

"I see," said DeMartino, "You know, as a COMBAT veteran MYSELF I can impart some ADVICE on how jarring the TRANSITION back to civillian life can BE."

"What do you mean?" asked Jamie.

DeMartino said "A word of ADVICE, Jamie. Just because you're HOME doesn't mean you're BACK."

Jamie looked thoughtful.

* * *

  
**Stacy and Chuck's house, the following afternoon...**

Quinn and Jim were telling Chuck and Stacy about the night before.

Quinn said "...so apparently Jamie's out of the Army and back in Lawndale now."

Stacy said "That's so cool."

Chuck said "How long was he in?"

Jim said "Apparently he decided two hitches was enough. Sandi told us he was going back to college on the GI Bill."

At this point, Quinn got an idea.

"We should all get together. It'd be a chance to catch up."

Stacy liked the idea.

"I know. We can have a party here. A sort of homecoming for an old friend."

Smiling, Quinn said "Stacy, that's a great idea."

Jim agreed.

"He'd definitely appreciate it. Especially after what he's probably been through."

"What do you mean by that, Jim?" asked Quinn.

"Well," Jim said, "As you know my father served three consecutive combat tours in Vietnam. From what I've gathered over the years one reason for his toxic personality was coming back and being made to feel like an unwelcome outsider for serving his country. That's one of the reasons Vietnam veterans had a much harder time re-integrating into civillian life than veterans of other wars. Knowing your services are appreciated goes a long way in healing the psychological scars war can inflict."

Chuck nodded.

"It's true. How much combat has Jamie experienced anyway?"

"I don't know," said Quinn, "No one's thought to ask him yet."

Stacy said "Well, it's settled then. We'll throw a welcome home party for him and invite all of our friends. What's his current address?"

"Same as it was in high school," said Quinn, "He temporarily moved back in with his parents."

All four of them smiled as they now know what they're going to do.

* * *

  
**White residence, late at night...**

Jamie was sleeping in his old room. Laying on the nightstand was a fully loaded Beretta M9 combat pistol. Jamie was tossing and turning in his sleep as the trip to dreamland was VERY unpleasant.

 **Fallujah, Iraq, 2004...**  
 **Music:** "The Warrior" by Disturbed

  
_I am one with the warrior inside_   
_My talents can't be denied_   
_Your entire world will turn into a bettlefield tonight_

Bullets and explosions were going on all around as a group of infantrymen were in the streets fighting insurgents shooting at them from the surrounding buildings. Several soldiers were going down in a hail of bulletts, grenades and RPG fire.

Among the US soldiers was Corporal Jamie White. Jamie saw two insurgents emerge from a door firing off AK-47's. Jamie immediately fired his M4 Assault Rifle at them and they both went down. No sooner was that done when he heard his squad leader's voice.

"CONTACT LEFT! RPG'S ON THE ROOF!"

Jamie immediately aimed his rifle, which was equipped with an M203 Grenade Launcher, and saw two insurgents aiming RPG's directly at the squad. He fired off a grenade, killing both insurgents on the roof. No sooner had he done this when several members of his platoon were suddenly mowed down by heavy machine fire.

"TAKE COVER!" the platoon sergeant yelled.

Soon, Jamie and other members of his rifle squad were running from cover to cover in order to reach a building that had an enemy machine gun nest on the second floor.

"WE NEED TO NEUTRALIZE THAT GUN!" the squad leader called out, "WHITE, TAKE POINT!"

Jamie led the squad into the building. No sooner had they entered through a side door when a closet door on Jamie's immediate left burst open and an insurgent tackled him, causing him to drop his weapon. The insurgent wrestled Jamie to the floor. Jamie reached up, grabbed his attacker and rolled him over. Before the attacker could respond to this Jamie pulled out his combat knife and plunged it into the enemy combatant's chest. He then used all of his might to turn the knife, shattering the insurgent's breastbone.

Jamie looked up to see his squad leader pinned on the floor by another insurgent who was about to open fire. He immediately reached for his side arm and shot the enemy before he could kill the squad leader.

**Lawndale, 2007...**

Jamie woke up with a start. On reflex, he took his handgun off the night stand and immediately squeezed off two rounds. After this, his eyes darted around. His breathing returned to normal as Jamie realized he was in his old bedroom back at home. He frowned as he further realized that he'd just shot up his own computer.

Jamie took several more breath's to calm himself further as he placed the gun back on the nightstand. He then stared at the monitor screen, now shattered with two 9mm hollow points embedded in it. He then remembered what Mr. DeMartino had told him at the bar.

_"Just because you're HOME doesn't mean you're BACK."_

Jamie frowned.

"Shit!"

He now hung his head in shame.

* * *

  
**Act II**   
**White Residence, day...**

Quinn approached the house and rang the doorbell. Jamie answered and was surprised to see Quinn. She looked a little different from when he'd last seen her the summer following graduation. Her hair had been cut to shoulder length and she now had a part instead of bangs. She was also more voluptuous, having abandoned super dieting in favor of just eating sensibly and working out which had caused her to fill out in all the right places.

"Quinn!?!" said Jamie, "Wow, you look great!"

Quinn smiled sweetly.

"Hi, Jamie. Can I come in?"

**The living room, a short time later...**

Quinn and Jamie were catching up.

"...so when I heard you were back I decided to pay you a visit."

Jamie smiled.

"Thanks, Quinn. It's nice to see you again."

"Before you ask," Quinn continued, "I have a boyfriend."

Jamie shrugged.

"It's cool. Frankly, I'm not looking to date anyone right now."

"How come?" asked Quinn.

The reason was that Jamie had some issues to deal with before he could pursue a serious relationship, but he decided now was not the best time to get into that.

"I need to get settled first."

"Makes sense," said Quinn, "By the way, sorry if I jumped to conclusions."

"It's alright," said Jamie, "Why did you worry I wanted a date, anyway?"

Quinn sighed. She decided that since he'd find out eventually it'd be best to just get it out of the way.

"Jeffy never got over his crush. A few months ago I found out that he'd been stalking me for years. Then, he tried to rape me."

Jamie's eyes went wide. True, the crush on Quinn had been intense but he'd never thought any of them would take it to that dark extreme.

"I'm sorry, Quinn," he said, "Did he...?"

Quinn shook her head.

"No. He tried, but Jim stopped him in time."

"Jim?"

"My boyfriend," said Quinn, "He's a great guy, you'd like him. So, what have you been up to? I mean, I know you dropped out of college and joined the Army, but that's all."

Jamie said "After 9/11 I really felt that I needed to do something so after fall semester I enlisted and became an infantryman. After one tour in Afghanistan I went to Airborne School and became a paratrooper in the 101st Air Assault Division. I took part in the invasion of Iraq in 2003 and was redeployed there twice, once in 2004 and again last year as part of the troop surge."

Quinn now got down to business.

"Jamie," she said, "The reason for the visit is that after we heard you were back we decided to throw a party for you at the Ruttheimer's. Sort of like a Welcome Home thing."

"The Ruttheimer's?" Jamie.

"Chuck and Stacy," Quinn answered, "They're married now."

Jamie was stunned.

"Stacy...married Upchuck!?"

Nodding, Quinn said "Yeah. Turns out those two are perfect for each other."

Jamie said "I guess we've all changed over the years."

"That we have," said Quinn, "So, you interested?"

"Of course."

Quinn smiled.

* * *

  
**Ruttheimer house, the night of the party...**

Quinn and Stacy were laying out refreshments on the dinning room table.

"Thank's for helping with the set up, Quinn."

Quinn said "No problem, Stacy."

Stacy called toward's the kitchen.

"Guys, how's it coming in there?"

Chuck peeked his head through the door.

"The punch is ready and Jim's finishing up the shrimp platter now."

Stacy nodded approvingly. After this, Chuck returned to helping Jim in the kitchen while Quinn poured a large bag of chips into a bowl.

"So, Quinn," said Stacy, "Jamie tell you any war stories?"

Quinn said "No, I didn't ask."

Stacy asked "How come?"

"Becuase," said Quinn, "I didn't wanna risk opening any wounds. Remember when you helped me do that paper about my grandfather's life back in high school?"

Stacy nodded as she'd found it hard to forget that Mad Dog Morgendorffer had seen action at both Okinawa in World War II and Chosin Resevoir during the Korean War.

Quinn went on with "My grandfather turned into a militaristic psycho because he'd been so traumatized by his wartime experiences. Jim's father was similarly affected by his time in Vietnam, which made him unable to function outside a military context. That's why Mr. Carbone became a mercenary after his time in the Army. So, yeah, I'm a little sensitive about that stuff."

"I see," said Stacy, "Did Jamie tell you anything on his own?"

Quinn said "Just that he's done four combat tours, one in Afghanistan and three in Iraq." At this point, something occurred to Quinn. "Why so interested?"

"Two reasons," said Stacy, "One, I've never knowingly spoken to a combat veteran outside of a strictly professional context before so I'm not sure what to talk about when Jamie arrives. Two, I'm a news reporter. It's in my nature to be inquisitive."

Quinn nodded as this made sense.

* * *

  
**Outside, a short time later...**  
 **Music:** "Day 'n' Nite" by Kid Cudi

Jamie approached the door. By now most of the other guests have arrived and the party was picking up. He was dresses in a t-shirt in jeans. He'd briefly considered donning his Class A for this but decided against it as he felt wearing civvies would help him get used to being just an average guy again. He rang the doorbell.

A few seconds later, Stacy answered.

"Hey, Jamie" she said.

Jamie said "Hi, Stacy." Noting that she now wore her hair down instead of in braids, he added "I like the new look."

"Thanks, but..."

She showed him the ring.

"I know," said Jamie, "Just being nice."

With that, she led him in and closed the door behind him.

"HEY, EVERYONE," Stacy called out, "THE GUEST OF HONOR HAS ARRIVED!"

Practically everyone at the party looked up and acknowledged Jamie. _It's like I'm the QB now_ he thought with a smile.

As the party resumed, he noted the guests. He saw Tiffany touching up her makeup while Sandi was bossing Joey around and Jim was fetching a drink for Quinn.

_Some things never do change._

He walked up to Quinn and Jim.

"Hey, Quinn."

Quinn said "Hi, Jamie. This is my boyfriend, Jim Carbone."

Jim shook hands with Jamie.

"Hey, man. Glad to meet ya."

"Likewise" said Jamie.

Jim said "So, two hitches in the Army, huh?"

Jamie nodded. "Enlisted after 9/11."

Jim said "I really appreciate that, dude. Thanks for the service."

Jamie modestly said "You're welcome, Jim. I wish more people would say that."

"Army brat," Jim explained, "I know how soldiers think because I grew up around them."

"Your father served?" asked Jamie.

Nodding, Jim said "Vietnam. He was in the Rangers." He prudently opted not to mention that his father had gone on to become a Delta Force operator during the Reagan Era then became a private security contractor after Iran/Contra brought his military career to an abrupt end.

"Cool" said Jamie.

Quinn was pleased to see her boyfriend and Jamie hitting it off.

* * *

 **Later...**  
 **Music:** "Don't Wait Up For Me" by The Donnas

  
_'Cause I've got one shot and the night is young_   
_So don't wait up for me_   
_I need another hit, YEAH, before I'm done_   
_So don't wait up for me_

Sandi was in the dinning room starring daggers at Joey and Jamie, who were chatting in the kitchen, when Quinn approached.

"Hey, Sandi, having a good time?"

Sandi acted as if Quinn weren't even there.

"Um, Sandi?"

Sandi acknowledged Quinn.

"Oh, hey, Quinn."

"Something wrong?" Quinn asked.

"I can't believe Joey's practically ignoring me" Sandi practically growled.

Quinn, upon seeing that Sandi's boyfriend was chatting with Jamie, said "Sandi, he hasn't seen his best friend in almost six years, so of course he wants to catch up."

Sandi's body language made it clear that this was cold comfort, so Quinn immediately changed the subject.

"Where's Nicole?"

"Don't know, don't care" Sandi practically hissed.

Before Quinn could ask what the reason for Sandi's bitch relapse was, Stacy approached with Nicole.

"Sorry I'm late, you guys" Nicole explained.

"Nicole," Sandi practically barked, "There's fashionably late and then there's just plain rude."

Nicole was taken aback.

"Woah! What crawled up your ass, Sandi?"

Sandi, realizing that she was being a class A bitch, calmed down.

"Sorry, Nicole, it's just..." She wanted to tell Nicole she found Joey's giving more attention to Jamie than her off putting, but decided against it. "Never mind."

With that, Sandi walked away.

"What's with her?" asked Quinn, "She's been copping an additude all night."

Stacy said "I think she and Joey are having problems."

Wanting to lighten the mood, Nicole asked "So, where's the war hero?"

Quinn pointed toward the kitchen.

Upon seeing Jamie, Nicole had one thought.

_Damn, he's hot! I'd LOVE to ride that._

As Stacy left to chat with some other guests Quinn and Nicole walked up to Jamie and Joey.

"Hey, guys" said Quinn.

"Hey, Quinn," said Joey, "You seen Sandi?"

Quinn, not wanting to get involved, lied. "No."

"I guess I'd better find her," said Joey, "Later, Jamie."

After Joey left, Quinn turned to Jamie, who Nicole was staring lustfully at.

"Jamie," said Quinn, "I'd like you to meet my other best friend, Nicole."

Jamie looked at Nicole and had one thought.

_She's hot!_

Coming out of her lusty trance, Nicole said "Nicole Yagami."

Shaking her hand, Jamie said "Corporal Jamie White." He then shook his head. "Actually, it's just Jamie now."

"Well," Nicole said in a much more flirty tone than she'd intended, "It's nice to meet you."

"Um..." Jamie was two enamored to speak.

Quinn looked at them with a knowing smile.

* * *

  
**Later...**  
 **Music:** "Shut Up And Drive" by Rihanna

Quinn and Jim were dealing with a visibly drunk Kevin. They were both annoyed as the former QB's clearly too drunk to realize that he's being a total asshole.

"'Ey, Qu...hic...Quinn. Ur ho...urp...hot."

Rolling her eyes, Quinn said "And you're wasted, Kevin."

Jim added "Yeah, leave us alone."

Kevin slurred "C'mon, Ji...hic...Jim. I's a pardy...burp..."

"Kevin," Quinn hissed, "Leave us alone."

"O...hic...M'kay."

Quinn and Jim both breathed a huge sigh of relief as Kevin went off to pester someone else.

Kevin saw Jamie and slowly walked up behind him. He'd intended to talk to him but suddenly tripped.

"AAAAHHHHHH!"

Kevin put his hand on Jamie's shoulder to stop himself from falling. Unfortunately, Jamie's eyes seemed to glaze over as he heard the scream and felt Kevin's hand.

**Mosul, Iraq, a year earlier...**

Jamie was bringing up the rear as his squad was clearing a building that was a known Al Qaeda safehouse. Suddenly, an Al Qaeda grabbed Jamie from behind.

"INFIDEL, DIE!!"

Jamie and the jihadist wrestled each other to the ground as the rest of the squad turned and aimed their rifles only to all be similarly ambushed.

**Chuck and Stacy's party, a year later...**

Kevin, unaware that his little stunt had set off a war flashback, was violently thrown to the floor. Next, Jamie pinned Kevin down and began to savagely beat him. This got the attention of the other guests.

"KEVYYYYYYY!!!" screamed a horrified Brittany.

An equally horrified Quinn shouted "JAMIE, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!"

Jamie was too lost in the flashback to hear the shouts and really believed he was fighting a jihadist who was trying to kill him. Jim ran over and pulled Jamie off of Kevin.

"Stand down, soldier," said Jim, "STAND DOWN!!! THAT'S AN ORDER!"

This snapped Jamie out of his flashback. He gasped in horror upon realizing whom he'd just thrown a savage beating. Brittany ran up to her husband.

"KEVIE, ARE YOU ALRIGHT!"

Spitting out some blood (and a tooth) Kevin said "I...I'm f...fine...babe...".

Brittany looked at Jamie. Her eyes flashed with rage.

"JAMIE, WHAT THE HELL'S WRONG WITH YOU!?"

"Oh...God..." Jamie gasped in horror.

* * *

  
**Act III**   
**Chuck and Stacy's house, evening...**

The homecoming party Stacy and Chuck were throwing for Jamie has just hit a major snag. Kevin, in a drunken stupor, thought it's be funny to senak up on Jamie. Unfortunately, this set off a war flashback that caused Jamie to beat Kevin up. Jim had to pull Jamie off and unleash his inner Tony in order to snap him out of it. Kevin has a bloody face and lost a tooth in the scuffle. Now back in the present, Jamie is horrified by what he's just done.

"Oh...God..."

Jim asked "Jamie, you alright?"

Jamie looked at Jim but said nothing. He then scanned the faces of the whole crowd. Some were worried while others were shaking their heads in disapproval. Jamie knew they were judging him.

 _No_ he thought, _Now they think I'm a psycho. WHY CAN'T I JUST BE A MAN AND SUCK IT UP!?_ Out loud, he muttered "I...Oh, God, I'm sorry!"

Brittany, who doesn't understand, barked "My husband was just trying to say hi, you goddamn psycho!"

"Kevin," said Jamie, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."

Brittany angrily cut him off.

"Just LEAVE US ALONE, YOU WACKJOB!"

Jamie ran toward the front door.

"Jamie, wait!" called out a concerned Quinn.

Jamie didn't listen but instead ran out the door.

* * *

  
**Fallujah, Iraq, 2004...**

Jamie, along with the rest of his platoon, was on board a Chinook. The mission was part of an attempt to liberate Fallujah, which had recently been overrun by Al Qaeda. Jamie was on the Mark 19 Grenade Launcher. He saw an anti-air battery on a nearby rooftop. Jamie took aim and destroyed the enemy position in a hail of grenade blasts.

There was a gunship flying along side. The pilot, Warrant Officer Danielle Todd, was in constant radio contact with the platoon aboard the Chinook. Suddenly, an RPG hit the gunship's tail rotor.

"I'M HIT!" Todd was heard saying over the radio. "WE'RE GOING DOWN!"

Jamie turned the Mark 19 on the rooftop where the RPG had come from and destroyed the insurgents on the roof. However, this was too late as the gunship crashed in the streets.

The Chinook pilot spoke into his headset.

"VENOM, THIS IS SKYFIRE! WHAT'S YOUR STATUS, OVER?"

After a few seconds, the pilot spoke again.

"VENOM, DO YOU READ?"

Then, over the radio they all heard Todd's voice.

"I'M HERE! MY CO-PILOT'S KIA! HOSTILES CLOSING IN FAST!"

Jamie's platoon commander barked "SET US DOWN, WE'RE GETTING TODD OUTTA THERE! NO ONE GETS LEFT BEHIND!"

After the Chinook landed the whole platoon ran toward the wreckage of Danielle's gunship.

"WHITE," the platoon commander barked, "GET TODD OUTTA THERE, WE'LL COVER YOU! GO!"

Jamie ran toward the downed helicopter while the rest of the platoon provided covering fire. He pulled Danielle out.

"I GOT YOU!"

Carrying an injured Danielle on his back, Jamie ran back toward his platoon. Suddenly, he heard Quinn's voice.

"Jamie?"

* * *

  
**Chuck and Stacy's front yard, 2007...**

by now the party has resumed while Jamie sits in the grass. The sound of Quinn's voice had brought him back to the present. He looked up to see both her and Jim standing there.

"You okay?" asked Jim.

Jamie shook his head.

"I haven't been okay since I got back. The reason I didn't re-up after my second hitch is that I'm burnt out on war. I...I can't stop thinking about what all I've been through."

Quinn and Jim sat down on each side of Jamie.

"That's actually pretty normal" said Quinn.

Jamie said "No, it isn't. It's a sign of weakness. I..." He couldn't think of how to explain it.

Jim said "I know, man. The military still kind of looks at PTSD as a sign of weakness, as evidence that you aren't man enough to suck it up but, frankly, that's a load of crap."*

*(They've gotten better about it since 2007, but still haven't fully accepted that PTSD's a normal reaction to combat.)

Quinn agreed. "Yeah. PTSD's a normal reaction to an abnormally stressful situation, and war CERTAINLY qualifies as an abnormally stressful situation."

"How would you know?" Jamie asked.

Quinn explained "Because a few month's ago Jeffy went crazy and tried to rape me. Jim stopped him but I still get rattled by how close I came to being violated. I've been in therapy since then. I still have my bad days, but I'm mostly over it now."

Jim added "It's true."

Jamie said "What really gets me sometimes is the guilt. I was just now thinking of a time when I was operating the mini-gun on a Chinook. A gunship that was flying with us was shot down by an RPG. We were able to save the pilot, but not the co-pilot. If I'd turned my head just a second earlier I would've seen the enemy getting ready to fire off that RPG."

"I get it," said Quinn, "I still sometimes blame myself for Jeffy going insane."

Jamie asked "How do you deal?"

Quinn said "By reminding myself that I didn't know stringing all three of you along in high school might one day result in something like that. I'm sorry, by the way."

"Don't be," Jamie reassured, "None of us knew any better back then. Besides, Joey turned out alright and my issues have nothing to do with anything you may have done back in high school."

Smiling, Quinn said "I know that now, but I did need some help getting there."

Jim said "You ever need anything, even if it's just a friendly ear, let us know. Quinn and I will be glad to help."

Jamie threw one arm around Quinn and another around Jim. He pulled them into a group hug.

"Thanks, guys."

None of them realized that Nicole had been eavesdropping on the whole conversation.

 _He's got major issues_ Nicole thought, _Is it weird that I still find him irresistibly attractive despite that?_

* * *

  
 **Inside, a few minutes later...**  
 **Music:** "Who Says You Can't Go Home" by Bon Jovi

Jamie, Quinn and Jim have rejoined the party and Jamie has just finished explaining what happened with Kevin to everyone. He was pleasantly surprised by their reaction.

"It's okay," said Chuck, "After everything you've been through I'd actually be shocked if you weren't messed up."

Added Stacy "Yeah, I've covered stories about this. It's actually not that big a deal."

Quinn said "You see, Jamie? No harm done."

"Thanks, guys" said Jamie.

Joey said "Dude, we were like brothers back in high school. I'm not forgetting that...ever. You need anything let me know, man."

"We really appreciate your sacrifice," said Sandi, "Also, you can always talk to Quinn. She's really good at helping people deal with that sort of thing."

Nicole nodded in agreement.

"It's true. I used to have major issues and being friends with Quinn and Stacy went a long way in helping me get over them."

"We've all been there," said Jim, "Maybe not as bad as you, but we've all had to deal with personal demons. We know what a struggle that can be."

Jamie smiled.

_This is the first time I've actually felt at ease since coming back. Maybe there's hope for me after all._

* * *

  
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, the following evening...**

Quinn was on the phone with Daria.

"...the rest of the party went off without a hitch after that. Also, Jamie decided to go into therapy."

Daria said "Makes sense. He's actually gonna start ahead of the curve now."

"What do you mean?" asked Quinn.

Daria explained "Having friends who are willing to help you goes a long way toward getting over trauma, as we both know all too well. Granted, I've never been through anything as intense as war but my friendship with Jane gave me the strength to deal with things that would've messed me up otherwise."

"I get that," said Quinn, "Sorry I wasn't more of a help back when we were kids."

"No need to apologize," said Daria, "You've been very helpful to me with my own issues."

Quinn asked "Why does everyone say that lately?"

"Because it's true" said Daria, "You've helped me get over my people issues."

Quinn giggled.

Daria asked "What's so funny?"

Quinn said "Just thinking how you no longer judge people for not meeting your intellectual standards while I accept peoples physical and mental flaws. I wonder what happened to us."

"We grew up," said Daria, "That's what happened."

"Amen to that, sis" said Quinn.

**End.**


	13. Clash Of The Families

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not knowing what his father's like, Helen invites Jim's parents over for Memorial Day. Rita and Grandma Barksdale invite themselves. Barkesdales, Morgendorffers and Carbones under one roof...Yikes!

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally berserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Clash of the Families"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Morgendorffer House, evening...**

Quinn and Jim were having Sunday dinner with Jake and Helen. Jake is serving up...something.

Jake said "You guys are gonna love this. I call it Linguine a la Jake!"

The linguine and tomato sauce look fine but something about the smell is off. It causes everyone else to scrunch their noses.

"Eww!" said Quinn "What's that smell?"

Jake said "The secret ingredients to my tomato sauce."

Jim said "I'll go first."

He put a forkfull in his mouth. He immediately regrets it.

"GAK!!! ARGHKKK, CHOKE!!!"

He spewed it into a napkin. After her trademark "EWWWW!!" Quinn eyed her boyfriend with concern.

"Dad, what did you put in this? Rat poison?"

Beaming, Jake said "No, honey. Just crushed postachioes, crushed jalapenos, wasabi and tobasco sauce. It adds a nice kick. Oh, yeah, we were out of tomato paste so I had to use peanut butter and mayonaise."

"Dah-ad, I'm allergic to postachioes! You know that."

Sheepish, Jake said "Sorry."

Helen rolled her eyes before taking charge of the situation.

"Jake, throw that stuff out. Quinn, make sure Jim doesn't need medical attention. I'll put some lasagna in the microwave."

Jim recovers as Jake clears the table and Helen puts some instant lasagna in the microwave.

Helen said "By the way, Jim, I've been on the phone with your mother a lot lately. She's such a nice woman."

Jim said "That she is. I think it's great that you two have hit it off."

Helen added "She's so nice, in fact, that's why I invited both of your parents over for Memorial Day weekend."

Remembering the disaster at Thanksgiving Quinn and Jim both frowned.

Quinn said "Mom, I don't know if that's a good idea. Yes, his mother's nice but Jim's father can be a little...well...difficult."

Jake overheared this.

"Oh, do I ever know what that's like. My mom always had to explain 'Oh, don't mind my husband, he's just difficult'. Difficult, hell, he was a psychotic, sadistic, uncaring bastard who always HAD TO TREAT ME LIKE CRAP AND MAKE ME FEEL UNLOVED. 'BUT, JAKE, REAL MEN DON'T NEED LOVE'. 'BE A MAN, JAKE, OR I'LL PUT YOUR ASS THROUGH THE WINDOW'. 'SUCK IT UP, YOU WORTHLESS, CANDY ASSED WASTE OF...'"

"JAKE!" Helen immediately barked, snapping him out of his rant.

"Sorry."

* * *

**Nicole's apartment, the next day...**

Quinn was telling Nicole about the situation.

"...so now I get to look forward to my parents meeting Jim's parents and can't stop worrying about it."

Nicole said "Quinn, how bad could it be?"

Quinn said "If you've ever met Jim's father you'd know."

"What's his father like, anyway?" Nicole asked.

Quinn said "Tony Carbone's a toxic psychopath. Remember the story about the mercenaries who came to recruit at my high school."

Nicole nodded.

"Tony's one of them" said Quinn, "He's also a sexist asshole with a violent streak. He hates my guts because he thinks I've turned his son into a wimp. He hates women who dare to think for themselves and generally treats people like shit."

"That bad, huh," said Nicole, "You're right, you should worry."

Quinn said "I'm afraid that Mr. Carbone will either get in my mother's face or set my father off. He's like that."

Nicole said "It's not like there's much you can do at this point. Just hope for the best."

"I guess. Maybe, because it's someone else's house, Mr. Carbone will actually behave himself."

Nicole said "You see, Quinn? It does no good to get worked up about what if's."

Quinn was relieved as she saw Nicole's point.

"I just hope there are no more surprises."

* * *

  
**Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Quinn and Jim were watching TV while Storm enjoys a squeak toy. Jim looked a little apprehensive, which Quinn noticed.

She asked "Jim, what's wrong?"

Jim said "I'm nervous. Mom and Dad staying here has me a little on edge."

Quinn said "It was nice of you to ask them to stay with us for the weekend."

Jim said "I'm just worried. What if Dad gets like he did on Thanksgiving?"

"Relax, honey. This is our place. If your father acts up we can kick him out. He has to respect that this is our place after all."

"Doesn't mean he will."

Quinn looks worried. The doorbell rings, which causes Storm to bark. Quinn and Jim walk to the door. It's Gina Carbone, Jim's mother. His father is nowhere to be seen.

Gina said "Jim, Quinn how are you?"

Jim hugged his mother.

"Hi, Mom."

Quinn and Gina hug.

"Hi, Mrs. Carbone."

"Please, Quinn, call me Gina."

Quinn smiled.

"Well, come on in, Gina."

Gina entered as Quinn closed the door and Jim takes her luggage. Gina walked up to Storm and scratched him behind the ears, which he loves.

Jim asked "Where's Dad?"

Gina looked sad.

"He doesn't want to come."

Secretly relieved, Jim said "Probably for the best. Is he still mad at me?"

Gina said "No, he's over that. He'll be at the Morgendorffer's for Memorial Day, though. I insisted."

Quinn asked "Why doesn't he wanna come here?"

Gina didn't know what to tell Quinn so she says nothing. Quinn immediately gets it.

"I see" Quinn said in a hurt and angry tone.

Gina said "I don't know what to say. You're such a wonderful person. I wish my husband felt differently about you but he doesn't. I'm sorry."

Quinn asked "Why does he hate me so much?"

Gina explained "He wanted Jim to be a successful businessman, not a mechanic. I think he's disappointed in Jim's choices and he blames you. I'm truly sorry, Quinn. You're such a sweet girl and you make my son so happy. I just wish my husband wouldn't be so stubborn."

Quinn said "That's okay. I wish he liked me but if he doesn't there isn't anything I can do about it."

In truth, she's both hurt and relieved. She's hurt that the man who could well be her future father in law hates her guts and relieved that she won't have to deal with him.

* * *

  
 **Meanwhile, at the Morgendorffer house...**  
 **Music:** "Gold Digger" by Kanye West

Jake and Helen were in the living room. While Jake watches TV Helen is going over some legal briefs. The doorbell rings.

Helen said "Jake, could you get that?"

From the TV comes the sound of a roaring crowd.

Jake shouts "GO, GO, GO, YES!"

Helen rolled her eyes and groaned.

"HE MADE THE SHOT! YES!"

The doorbell rings again. This is followed by the sound of pounding on the door.

"JAKE!"

"GAH!"

He calms down.

"Helen, I didn't mean to dial a phone sex line, I swear!"

Helen said "Someone's at the door. Could you please answer."

She suddenly thinks of something.

"What do you mean a phone sex line?"

Nervous, Jake said "Er...Well...That is..."

The bell rings again and there's more pounding.

"Um...I'd better get that!"

He hurries to the door and opens it.

"EEP!"

He is bopped on the head with a cane while Rita says "It's about time!"

Helen called out "Jake, who is it?"

Jake gulps as it's Rita and Emma Barksdale.

Emma said "It really in quite rude of you to not answer the door right away."

Jake felt a sense of impending doom.

* * *

  
**Morgendorffer house, evening...**

Jake and Helen's relaxing evening has just been interrupted by the arrival of her sister, Rita, and her mother, Emma.

"Mom, Rita this is a surprise!"

Emma, in a condescinding tone, said "And why would a mother visiting her daughter be a surprise?"

Mother and daughter stared daggers at each other. Sensing the oncoming fight Jake started to walk away.

Rita asked "Where are you going?"

Jake gulped.

"To make some martini's."

Helen said "Rita and mother don't drink martinis, Jake."

"I meant for me.." under his breath he added "...I'll need 'em."

As Jake disappears into the kitchen Helen, Rita and Emma sit down in the living room.

Helen asked "So, what brings you here on such short notice?"

Rita said "Erin called and told me that you invited Quinn's boyfriend's parents over for Memorial Day. I told mother and she insisted we come up so here we are."

Emma said "I am ever so eager to meet the family of her gentleman caller. I want to be sure that, unlike Erin, Quinn married well."

Helen corrected "Quinn and Jim aren't married, Mom."

Emma said "But Erin told us they live together now."

"They do."

Emma gave her daughter a disapproving look.

"Living in sin, I see. My opioion of that has not changed. I thought it was immoral when you and Jake did it and I think it's immoral now." Emma's voice now has a bitter sting to it. "Like mother, like daughter I see. Shameful."

Helen stared daggers at her mother. Jake came back with a whole pitcher of martinis. He sees Emma and Helen stare each other down and immediately starts to drink.

Regaining her composure, Helen said "It still would have been nice if we had warning beforehand."

Rita said "Sorry, it really was a spur of the moment thing. It's not like I had other obligations."

Bitter, Helen said "Like a job."

This gets her a bop on the head from Emma's cane.

"Be nice to your sister, young lady."

Helen looks like she wants to punch her mother in the face.

* * *

  
**On the street, morning...**

Quinn, Jim and Gina were in Quinn's car along with Storm. They are driving to Jake and Helen's.

Quinn asked "Does your husband know how to get here?"

Gina said "I gave him directions. He'll call me on my cell if he has trouble."

Quinn said "Okay" while thinking Damn it!

Jim said "So, Mom, how are things at home?"

Gina said "I've been getting calls from your brother lately."

"How's he doing?"

Gina said "He keeps asking me for relationship advice. Apparently he and Brooke have hit a rough patch."

Quinn thought Better not introduce him to Wind Lane.

The car pulled into the Morgendorffer's driveway. Quinn saw Rita's white Cadallac and frowned.

"Barksdale alert."

Gina asked "What do you mean, Quinn?"

Quinn said "That Cadallac belongs to my aunt, Rita. She and Mom don't have the healthiest sibling relationship."

Jim said "I just hope your grandmother isn't here. If she is things could get VERY ugly when Dad shows up."

* * *

  
 **Morgendorffer house, a short time later...**  
 **Music:** "Light 'em Up" by Fall Out Boy

Everyone was making introductions. Gina and Helen shook hands.

Gina said "Helen, it's a pleasure to finally meet you in person."

Helen said "Oh, Gina, the pleasure's all mine."

Gina turned to Jake.

"And you must be Jake. Helen's told me all about you."

"Good things, I hope."

"No."

Gina's no is said in a tone that lets everyone know that she's joking. They share a quick laugh before shaking hands. Meanwhile, Rita is introducing herself to Jim.

"I'm Quinn's aunt, Rita. I don't believe we've met."

She and Jim politely shake hands.

"Pleasure to meet you, Miss?"

"Just call me Rita. With all of my failed marriages I've lost track of what my last name should be."

She and Jim share a laugh. Emma approached Quinn. Without preamble she bops Quinn's head with her cane.

"OW! What was that for, Grandma?"

Emma said "For living with a man out of wedlock. I find your choice immoral."

Before it can escalate further Helen and Jake lead Gina over to them.

Helen said "Gina, I'd like you to meet my sister, Rita, and my mother, Emma Barksdale."

Rita said "Pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Carbone."

Gina said "Please, call me Gina."

She and Rita shake hands. Gina then turned her attention to Emma.

"Mrs. Barksdale."

They shake hands.

Emma said "Did you know that your son and my granddaughter are living in sin?"

Gina said "With all due respect, Mrs. Barksdale, I don't see it that way."

Emma said "Clearly you have not raised your boy properly."

Gina was immediately taken aback.

"Listen, how I raised my kids is frankly none of your damn business."

"He's corrupting my granddaughter," said Emma, "It tarnishes family honor."

Gina rolled her eyes. "I don't see it that way." Under her breath, she added "Putana."

Emma heard that, and knew that putana is bitch in Italian. She was about to hit Gina with her cane when the doorbell rings.

"Saved by the bell." Jim muttered under his breath.

Jake said "I'll get it."

He opened the door. It's Tony Carbone.

"Tony Carbone. You must be the wimp that spawned the red haired harlot."

Jake lost his shit.

"DON'T TALK THAT WAY ABOUT MY DAUGHTER!"

Helen barked "JAKE!"

He calmed down and let Tony in. Gina got right in her husband's face.

"I heard what you said just now. Remember, you promised to behave yourself."

Tony said "I'm not gonna pretend I approve of their relationship when I don't."

Gina threw up her arms in frustration and let out an exasperated sigh.

Emma said "Did you know that they're living in sin?"

Tony said "Yeah, I knew."

"And you approve as well!?"

"No. In fact, I disapprove of the whole relationship."

Emma was pleased to hear this.

"Finally, someone with some sense of propriety."

Emma and Tony exchange smiles. Everyone else is now very worried.

* * *

  
**The Morgendorffer's back yard, evening....**

Jake, Tony and Jim were grilling hot dogs and hamburgers.

Jake said "So, Tony, Jim tells me you used to be in the military."

Smiling, Tony said "Damn right. Served with the Rangers in 'Nam. You?"

"Only if military school counts."

Tony said "It's a great way to make a boy into a man. I sent you, Jim, but your mother forced me to pull you out after one year."

Jim rolled his eyes. The last thing he wanted to remember was spending eighth grade at Buxton Ridge.

"Dad, could we not?"

Tony got right in Jim's face.

"You got a problem with serving this country, boy?"

Jim stays silent, knowing any answer he gives will just start a fight. Tony shakes his fist.

"Well? I asked you a question, mama's boy?"

Jim said "No, I don't have a problem with it and I'm proud of your service."

Tony said "You know that Iraq would make a real man out of you, just like Vietnam did for me."

That set Jake off.

"Oh, I remember how badly my father wanted me to go to Vietnam. 'Real men fight, Jake.' 'You're not a man until you've been in a war, Jake.' 'Only commies are against the war, Jake'. 'I forbid you to MARRY THAT HIPPIE SLUT, JAKE'."

Tony got in Jake's face.

"WHAT ARE YOU? YOU GOTTA BE EITHER A COMMUNIST OR A TOTAL CHICKEN. WHICH IS IT?"

As Jake and Tony shout over each other Jim groans. He sees the two pitchers of martinis that Jake made. He immediately grabs one and starts drinking.

* * *

  
**Meanwhile, at the kitchen table...**

Quinn, Helen, Gina, Rita and Emma were seated at the table and making small talk despite the tension.

Gina said "...Tony's been so bitter since he left the Army."

Storm sniffed Emma's cane, which she doesn't like one bit.

"Get back, you filthy beast."

She smacks Storm with her cane. Storm yelped and ran to Quinn, who is now pissed at Emma.

"HEY! don't hit my dog."

Emma shook her cane at Quinn.

Scowling, Helen said "Mother, please respect the rules of this house."

Rita said "Leave Mom be, Helen."

To Rita, Emma said "Thank you, dear."

At this point they hear voices from outside. They looked out toward the patio to see Jake and Tony getting in one another's faces and exchange insults.

"JERK!"

"COWARD!"

"FACIST!"

"COMMIE!"

"PRYCHO!"

"MAMA'S BOY!"

"BASTARD!"

Tony punched Jake in the face for that one.

"JAKE!" Helen cried out.

"TONY!" shouted a VERY angry Gina.

Helen and Gina immediately run out. Helen goes to Jake while Gina gets right in Tony's face. Jake has a black eye.

"Jake, are you all right?" Helen asked.

Jake gets up. "I'LL KILL HIM!" He began to charge at Tony, but his wife restrained him.

Firmly, Helen said "No, you won't!"

Jake immediately calmed down.

Smirking, Tony said "Need your woman to come to your rescue. You pussy."

"Dammit, Tony!" Gina barked "You promised to behave yourself!"

"He started it" said Tony, pointing at Jake.

Jake shouted "DID NOT!"

Gina firmly said "Tony, inside!"

Tony stared his wife down. Gina didn't even flinch.

"NOW, TONY!"

Tony grunted.

"Fine, I get along better with Mrs. Barksdale anyway."

Helen, Gina and Tony all go inside while Jim and Jake remain by the grill.

Until the door slid shut, Gina could be heard telling Tony "YOU PROMISED TO BEHAVE AND I FIND YOU CARRYING ON LIKE A SPOILED BAMBINO!" She threw her arms up in frustration. "MANAGGIA LA MISERIA! FIGLIO DELLA PUTANA!"*

*( "JUST MY DAMN LUCK! SONOF A BITCH!")

The door slid shut as Gina continued to chew her husband out in both English and Italian. Once they're alone Jake grabs the other pitcher of martinis and starts drinking.

"Sorry about that" said Jim.

Jake said "Your father is just like my father was."

"He ever make you do pre-dawn PT drills to 'man you up' like mine did?" Jim asked bitterly as he took another huge gulp from his pitcher.

Jake said "DAMN RIGHT HE DID! HE ALSO THREW ME IN MILITARY SCHOOL WHEN I WAS ELEVEN AND LEFT ME THERE UNTIL I WAS EIGHTEEN!!!"

"Join the club," said Jim, "My father threw me in when I was thirteen. I was only in that hell hole for a year, though. That's how long it took Mom to get him to pull me out. Eight grade at Buxton Ridge is a fate I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy!"

Jake's eyes went wide.

"Buxton Ridge! That's the one my dad threw me in!"

Jake and Jim smiled and clinked their pitchers together. They have a lot to talk about.

* * *

**Meanwhile, inside...**

Tony was now seated with the women at the table.

"What is it with this family?" Tony asked in astonishment, "The man of the house acts like a woman and all of the women act like men."

Emma said "I often ask that myself."

Now, it's Helen who gets in Tony's face.

"I consider that a good thing, you chauvanistic oaf. Especially given your definition of manly."

Offended, Gina gets in Helen's face.

"Just what are you getting at, Helen?"

At this point, Quinn decided to get out of Dodge. She looks at her watch.

"Oh, my! Look at the time. I'd better take Storm for a walk."

She puts Storm's leash on and makes a quick exit as Helen, Gina and Tony try to shout over each other.

* * *

  
**Morgendorffer back yard, evening...**

There's now black smoke coming from the grill and the meat is all burnt and ruined. This is because instead of grilling like they're supposed to Jake and Jim are getting drunk and ranting.

Jake said "So I mentioned going to tennis camp and next thing I know, BAM, seven years of hell in a military academy!"

Jim slurred "I was never gonna be goo...hic...good enough f'r my old man. He calls me a...burp...waste of sperm and...hic...candyass to this day."

Jake said "I...hic...hears ya,...burp...pal."

**Meanwhile, inside...**

Helen and Gina are in each others faces arguing gender politics.

Helen said "Maybe if you didn't buy into old gender stereotypes your husband would have more respect."

Gina snapped "How dare you! I chose to be a stay at home mom. Don't take it out on me that you're a bad mother!"

"YOU DARE!"

Tony said "Don't you dare contradict my wife, you goddamn harpy."

"Che mincha,"* Gina snapped, "Stay out of this, Tony!"

*(dammit)

Rita got right in Tony's face.

"Don't call my sister a harpy!"

Tony barked "Stay out of this!"

Emma got right in Tony's face. She says nothing but smacks him with her cane.

"OW! WHAT THE F..."

Emma smacks him again.

"The first one for the tone you took with my dear daughter, the second was for language."

No one can understand what's being said now as they are all trying to talk over each other.

* * *

  
 **Somewhere in the neighborhood...**  
 **Music:** "Electric Feel" by MGMT  
 _Ooooo, girl_  
 _Shock me like and electric eel_  
 _Baby girl_  
 _Turn me on with your electric feel_

Quinn was still taking Storm for a walk, enjoying the peace and quiet. They stoped at a fire hydrant and Storm relieved himself on it.

_Quinn thought Thank God I got out of there when I did. The tension was so thick I could smell it._

Storm finished his business and they continue on their way. Quinn continued to think.

_Mom, Dad, Aunt Rita, Grandma Emma and Jim's father under one roof is a bomb waiting to go off. First, Erin's wedding ends in a riot. Then, Mom and Aunt Rita constantly fighting the first time Erin tried to leave Brian. Then, that Christmas disaster my senior year. Erin's divorce, the last two Thanksgivings. Is it too much to ask if once, just once, I attend a family gathering that doesn't trun into a knock-down, drag-out fight?_

At this point, Quinn and Storm round the corner and head back toward her parents house.

_It's been almost two hours. Maybe they've got it all out of their system by now. If I'm lucky, Tony and Grandma have killed each other._

Quinn has a bemused smile.

_God, that thought was so Daria. I wonder when I'll get glasses and throw all of my fashion sense out the window._

As Quinn approached her parents house she smelled burnt beef and pork. She then saw the black smoke coming from the backyard.

_Dad screwed up again, no surprise there. But Jim never messes up at cooking. What gives?_

Quinn and Storm approach and when they're close enough she hears Jim shout "I NEVER, NOT ONCE, WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM! HE'S ALWAYS LOOKING FOR AN EXCUSE TO TREAT ME LIKE CRAP!" follwed by Jake shouting "SEVEN YEARS, DAMMIT! THAT'S HOW LONG I WAS IN THAT FASCIST HELL HOLE! SEVEN GODDAMN YEARS! GAAAAHHHH! BURN IN HELL, OLD MAN!".

Quinn rolled her eyes.

 _Great_ she thought, _Dad's going down memory road and it sounds like he took Jim with him. This better be the worst thing going on._

* * *

  
 **Inside the house...**  
 **Music:** "Vengeful One" by Disturbed  
 _I'm the hand of God_  
 _I'm the dark messiah_  
 _I'm the vengeful one_

Quinn entered the house and was greated by a chorus of angry voices shouting over each other.

_I don't believe this. I came back to a war zone._

She went to the kitchen. She can't understand what Tony, Rita and Emma are saying because they keep shouting over each other. Helen and Gina are giving each other the silent treatment. Quinn rolls her eyes.

_I'm gonna have to patch things up, aren't I? Might as well get started._

She approached Helen.

"Mom, what's going on?"

Irritated, Helen said "Your father and Jim are outside getting drunk while Jim's father is being an imbecile and Gina is being difficult."

Gina said "Excuse me! You called me weak!"

Helen said "I only insinuated that your husband is the way he is because you wait on him hand and foot."

Gina snipped "As opposed to neglecting my family like you do."

"Well, I never! How dare..."

"Knock it off!" Quinn barked, "You to are acting like a couple of little kids right now. You got along so well. Now make up and help me with everyone else."

Helen said "This is my house, young lady!"

Undeterred, Quinn said "And I seem to be the only one in it who's acting like an adult. Now make up, you two!"

The stern tone and firm body language were so similar to Helen that no one failed to notice.

Calming down, Gina said "She's right, Helen. I guess we were acting a little ridiculous. I shouldn't have gotten on you for giving my husband a talking to. He deserved it."

Helen said "That's okay, Gina. I think in the heat of the moment we both said things we shouldn't have."

Gina offerd her hand.

"Friends?"

Helen shook Gina's hand.

"Friends."

Quinn thought _One down, two to go._

She sticks her fingers in her mouth and whistles so loud that it gets everyones attention and the shouting stops.

Quinn said "Grandma, Aunt Rita my Mom would like to have a talk with you two."

Stern, Gina said "And I'd like to have a talk with you, Tony!"

Helen said "Mom, Rita if you're going to stay here I really must insist that you both behave yourselves. This is my house and you just invited yourselves over and proceed to cause trouble. It stops now."

Rita said "Or else what, Helen?" in a very defiant tone.

"Or else I exercise my right to kick you both out."

Shaking her cane, Emma said "You wouldn't dare."

In a menacing tone, Helen said "Try me."

Emma thumbed her nose at Helen.

"Very well. Come on, Rita. We're going home."

With that, Rita and Emma left.

Once they were gone, Tony said "At least the spoiled princess and vicious old bat are gone. Good riddance!"

Gina got right in Tony's face.

"You're in trouble, too. Dammit, Tony, you promised to behave yourself and instead you cause trouble before you've even walked through the door. You've insulted our hosts, embarrassed me and picked a fight with everyone. To say that I'm disappointed would be an understatement, you cafon*. You're going home right now."

*(asshole)

Tony said "Fine, let's go."

Gina said "I'm staying and coming down tomorrow. I'll see you then, at which point we WILL continue this discussion."

"But...but..."

"No buts, Tony. MOVE IT!"

Tony made a menacing face, but Gina stood her ground.

"AHORA*, TONY!"

*(NOW)

Tony finally relented.

"FINE!"

With that, Tony stormed out of the house.

Quinn said "That was impressive, Gina."

Gina said "Even though it doesn't seem like it that's actually why Tony loves me. I'm the one person who can keep his culo in line. The men in that family have always been attracted to strong women. I think that's why Jim is so smitten with you. You remind me a lot of myself at your age."

Quinn smiled.

"Thanks."

Helen said "Quinn, let's go collect our men."

Gina said "I'll make some sandwiches."

* * *

  
**Outside...**

Jim and Jake were both now on the verge of passing out.

Jake said "Y'know...hic...I thinnk we should...should...burp...

Jim slurred "I's goddn' qu...hic...quied."

This was followed by the sound of Helen's voice.

"JACOB HENRY MORGENDORFFER!"

"GAH!!"

Then they heard Quinn's voice.

"JAMES GIOVANNI CARBONE!"

"YIPE!!"

Quinn and Helen were both there and displeased.

Quinn said "Dammit, Jim, you're drunk!"

"No...urp...I nod...hic..."

Helen said "Jake, you're so drunk you ruined dinner."

Jake said "B...burp...but...hel...hic...Helen..."

"No buts, mister."

Quinn said "I'm very disappointed in you, Jim. Getting hammered when you were supposed to grill. What were you thinking?"

"Aww...Quinnnnn...lig'n up...hic...yur preddy."

"And you're wasted. I'm taking you to my old room right now so you can sleep it off."

Helen said to Jake "And you're going to bed too. End of discussion."

Jake just frowns. Helen throws his arm over her shoulder and helps him inside. Quinn does the same with Jim.

Jim slurred "'R' we...hic...gon' has zex.."

Quinn just rolls her eyes.

* * *

  
**The next morning...**

Jim woke up in Quinn's old room with a pounding headache.

"Oww! Did someone get the number of that freight train?"

Quinn, fully showered and dressed, stood over him.

"You okay, Jim?"

"I've got the worst hangover ever, so...no."

Quinn said "Serves you right."

Jim said "I'm sorry. I just couldn't deal."

Quinn softened her demeanor. She sat next to Jim and sympathetically put an arm over his shoulder.

"That's okay, Jim. I forgive you."

"Quinn, I ruined a family gathering."

"You and everyone else involved."

Jim now looks sad, which Quinn noticed.

"Jim, what's wrong?"

Jim said "Why do you stick with me?"

"Duh, I love you."

"Even though I come from such a messed up family?"

"Yes. I mean look at what my family's like. I have a thick skin about this stuff."

Jim said "I'm sorry my father hates you. I wish he'd come around."

Quinn explained "He seems like the type who wouldn't admit it if he did. At least your mother likes me. Even if your whole family despised me it wouldn't matter. I'm with you, not them."

Jim said "Quinn, don't get me wrong, but what about in the future. I still think it's too soon for us to tie the knot but, hypothetically, do you think you could handle having them as realtives if we ever were to take that step? I'm not proposing, just wondering."

Quinn said "Of course, Jim. If I ever decide to spend the rest of my life with you then I'm willing to take everything that comes with it, even in laws I can't stand."

Jim held Quinn close.

"Thanks, Quinn. I love you."

"I love you too, Jim."

They stay like that for a long time, unaware that they have an audience. Helen was looking at them with a huge smile on her face.

 _They really do love each other_ Helen thought as she wiped away a stray tear.

**End.**


	14. Beach Daze

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a day at the beach with summertime romance...and one VERY annoying poser.

**Opening Montage**  
 **Theme:** "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne

We see Quinn and Jim having a romantic dinner. Next, we see Quinn entertaining clients while Jake beams proudly. We then see Eric trying to boss Helen around, but Helen is having none of it. Cut to Stacy and Chuck holding hands while Sandi looks on enviously. Kevin and Brittany are making out in the girls locker room while Brittany is supposed to be coaching. Cut to Mr. DeMartino going totally berserk. Cut to Quinn having a girls night out with Stacy and Nicole. Montage ends with Quinn's smiling face in front of a pink background. Below that:

**Quinn**   
**in**   
**"Beach Daze"**   
**written by**   
**WildDogJJ**

**Act I**   
**Pizza King, day...**

Jamie White was sitting alone in a both having a slice of pizza. He looked around and noted all the differences.

 _None of the old crowd's around_ he thought with a frown. _Life went on without me._

He realized that there still were plenty of his old friends around. Joey was still in Lawndale and the two had recently connected. Jeffy, however, was in a state run psychiatric facility after his crush on Quinn snowballed into a dangerous obsession. Quinn was still around. She was now a partner in her father's business and lived with her boyfriend. Fortunately, unlike Jeffy, Jamie was long over his high school crush on Quinn. He and Jim, Quinn's boyfriend, were actually friends.

_Maybe my life's not so bad after all._

His relief instantly gave way to envy. While all his old friends went on to live normal lives he'd gone off to war. Six years in the Army, one combat deployment to Afghanistan, three such deployments to Iraq, being haunted by the memories of war. He was glad his time in the service was over. He actually looked at his reflection in the glass frame of the picture over his booth, the growing hair on his head a reminder that he's a civillian now. Suddenly, his silent self-reflection was interrupted.

"Jamie?"

Jamie turned to see a beautiful Asian girl standing there. This girl was wearing a business casual outfit and had a pink streak dyed into her otherwise jet-black hair. Other than that, she looked like Tiffany with a Brittany-sized rack. Her name was Nicole Yagami. She was one of Quinn's friends.

"Hey, Nicole" said Jamie.

"Mind if I sit here?" she asked.

Jamie's heart actually skipped a beat as he said "Sure".

Nicole sat down with her tray.

"What are you doing here?" Jamie asked.

Nicole explained "FeistyIT's just a few doors down from here. This is where I usually spend my lunch break."

Smiling, Jamie said "I can't believe you work for Upchuck...I mean Chuck. I figured someone like you would've been sexually harrassed by now." I did NOT just say that!

Flattered, Nicole said "Thanks, but he's such a gentleman now that I can't believe he was known as the resident creep back in high school."

Jamie specualted "I guess being married to Stacy Rowe's been good for him."

Nicole said "That's my theory as well."

Jamie noticed she was eating the carnivore special, like him.

"You got the carnivore special?" he said, "Don't you worry about your figure?"

Nicole said "That's why I work out."

"It shows," said Jamie without thinking, "You only have fat in areas where it's attractive." A second later, he thought _Could I be anymore of a creep!?_

Nicole hoped he didn't notice her blushing as she said "Thanks." Pointing to her chest, she added "But these are implants. I got them when I was sixteen. I'm naturally a B." _Why am I okay with disclosing such intimate details with this guy!?_

Surprised, Jamie asked "Your parent's were okay with that?!"

Nicole gave the same answer she usually gave when asked that question.

"It's different in California."

"So," said a genuinely interested Jamie, "You're from California."

Nicole nodded.

"Born and raised in Encino."

The two exchanged warm smiles.

* * *

**Quinn and Jim's apartment, evening...**

Quinn and Jim were seated on the couch watching TV while their dog, Storm, was resting at their feet. On the TV screen was a girl dressed as Sakura from Naruto making out with a guy dressed as Duke from GI Joe.

"They found true love...at ComiCon! Love In The Time Of Cosplay, next on Sick, Sad World!"

As the TV cut to commercial there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it" said Jim.

As he opened the door Nicole stood there.

"Hi, Nicole."

"Hey, Jim. Is Quinn here?"

Jim let Nicole in and closed the door behind her. Quinn looked up and smiled.

"Hey, Nicole."

Nicole sat down next to Quinn on the couch.

"Quinn, I need to talk to you...Girl stuff."

Knowing what that means, Jim picked up Storm's leash.

"Hey, Storm. Let's go for a walk, boy."

Storm excitedly walked up to Jim and let him put the leash on.

"Be back in a bit" said Jim as he and Storm left.

Once alone, Quinn asked "So, Nicole, what's on your mind?"

Nicole said "I ran into Jamie White at lunch today."

"How is he?" asked Quinn.

"He's good," said Nicole, "We sat and talked for a bit. I...well...I've never felt so comfortable with a guy, especially a hottie like Jamie."

Quinn had a knowing smile on her face.

"You're seriously crushing on him, aren't you?"

Nodding, Nicole admitted "Yes. From the moment I first saw Jamie I wanted him. Even after his freakout at that party I still found him incredibly attractive. Today at the pizza joint we started talking and it felt so natural. We've been practically hanging on each other's every word."

"This is soooo cute," said Quinn, "You're falling hard for this guy."

Slightly embarrassed, Nicole said "Yes. At first I thought it was just physical attraction, albeit one so intense that my vibrator's been putting in a lot of overtime lately, but after today I'm starting to think it's more than that."

Quinn nodded in understanding.

"I seem to recall a similar reaction when I met Jim, and Trevor before him. Why don't you ask Jamie out?"

Nicole became visibly nervous.

"I...Well, I'm afraid he may not be interested."

Quinn asked "Why wouldn't he be interested?"

Nicole said "Because he's a hunky war vet and I'm an anime geek."

Quinn said "An anime geek who looks like a former Fashion Clubber." More serious, she added "I've seen the way Jamie looks at you, Nicole. Trust me, he's VERY interested."

Nicole looked uncertain.

"Tell you what," said Quinn, "How about this weekend we all go to the beach? You, me, Jim and Jamie. Sort of like a double-date. You two would have a chance to form a connection without all the pressure."

Nicole said nothing but looked thoughtful.

* * *

**White residence, the next day...**

Jim and Jamie were seated on the couch playing a NASCAR themed racing game. Jamie was playing as Jeff Gordon while Jim was playing as Kevin Harvick. Jim had just zoomed past Jamie to cross the finish line first.

"Dammit!" said Jamie as he paused the game, "How'd you get this good, Jim?"

Jim said "I used to street race. I just transferred those skills to this game."

Jim now decides to pitch the double date idea to Jamie.

"Listen, man, what do you think of Quinn's friend, Nicole?"

Jamie said "She's hot! She has Tiffany Blum-Deckler's exotic Asian features and Brittany Thompson's rack."

Laughing, Jim said "Amen to that, bro."

On a roll, Jamie said "She's also smart, nice and very free spirited. Nicole Yagami's the whole freakin' package. I'd totally blow off other chicks to be with her."

"Exactly," said Jim, "So why don't you ask her out, dude?"

Jamie frowned.

"I'm a combat vet with issues."

"So?" said Jim, "My Dad hadn't even been back from Vietnam a year when he started going out with my Mom. Thirty-five years and two kids later they're still together. You should go out with Nicole and see what happens."

"Jim," said Jamie, "Why are you suddenly on me about this?"

Jim said "You didn't hear it from me, but Nicole came over last night. Later, Quinn told me that she's crushing on you pretty hard."

Jamie's eyes lit up and his voice took on a hopeful tone.

"Really!?"

Jim nodded.

"That's why Quinn invited her to spend a day at the beach with us this weekend and asked me to invite you. Sort of like a double-date."

Jamie was hesitant.

"I don't know, Jim."

Jim was insistant.

"Come on, Jamie. Fun in the sun."

Jamie was still visibly hesitant. Jim played his trump card.

"Quinn and Nicole...in bikini's."

That brought Jamie around.

"Okay, I'm in."

Jim grinned in triumph.

* * *

**Annapolis, that Saturday...**

Jim and Jamie were standing around in their board shorts with the glistening waters of Chesapeake Bay in the background. They're outside the ladies bathhouse waiting for their respective dates to finish changing.

"What's taking so long?" Jamie asked.

"Probably girl talk" said Jim.

**Inside the bath house...**

Quinn and Nicole were talking.

"It was really nice of Jim to invite Jamie" said Nicole.

"All according to plan," said Quinn, "I get to spend a day at the beach with my man and you get to snag a man of your own."

Nicole asked "Quinn, why didn't we just put the bikini's on under our regular clothes?"

Quinn said "Because one way to seal the deal with a guy is to wow him. As you well know, the way to a man's heart is not through his stomach. It's a bit lower than that." Reaching into her bag, she added "That's why I insisted we wear the sexiest bikini's we own. One look at us in these babies and we own those guys."

Nicole said "Makes sense. Sorry if I seem like a spaz about this. It's just..you know..."

Quinn smiled as she finished her friend's sentence. "You're so into Jamie that you can't think straight."

Nicole nodded as she reached into her own bag.

"Well, I ask because you already have Jim. I havn't gotten Jamie yet."

Quinn waived dismissively.

"And miss an opportunity to make an entrance. Come on, Nicole, you know me better than that."

Nicole smiled.

"Let's turn some heads."

* * *

**Outside, a few minutes later...**

Jamie and Jim were still waiting. Jamie checked out one girl in a bikini. Suddenly, the sound of Quinn's voice directed their attention back toward the bath house.

"Hey, boys!"

Jim and Jamie looked. What they saw made their jaws drop.

 **Music:** "Barracuda" by Heart.

Quinn and Nicole walked towards them in sexy bikini's. They made a show of walking.

Quinn was in a blue string bikini that left very little to the imagination. The top barely covered her boobs and the bottom was so low cut that one could easily guess her grooming style.

Nicole was in a black bikini with a green floral pattern that was just as revealing as Quinn's. Indeed, one would have to wonder how she keeps her D-cups from popping out.

As the two girls strutted toward their dates several male passerby stopped to stare.

 _I've still got it at 24_ Quinn thought.

 _We are officially goddesses_ thought Nicole. _Every guy here wants us._

Jim and Jamie both stared.

 _Two years together and I still can't get over how drop-dead sexy Quinn is_ Jim thought.

 _Nicole's a sexy Asian goddess_ thought Jamie. _I'm in love!_

* * *

**Act II**   
**Annapolis Beach, day...**

The emergence of Quinn and Nicole from the ladies bath house has turned quite a few heads due to the sexy bikini's they're wearing. One guy approached them. This guy was muscular with bleach blond hair and a surfer tan, despite the fact that there aren't exactly bitchin' waves on Chesapeake Bay.

"Can I get you ladies anything?"

Smiling politely, Quinn said "That's sweet, but I'm here with my boyfriend."

Quinn then walked up to Jim.

"Ready to go, babe?" she asked him.

"You bet, babe" Jim replied.

As Quinn and Jim walked away arm in arm the guy looked totally deflated. Another guy, this one with short, gelled black hair and a latin skin tone, approached Nicole.

"Hey," he said, "What's your name?"

"Nicole. You?"

"Mike," he said, "And my I say, you look stunning, bella senorita."

He actually kissed Nicole's hand when he said that.

"Thanks," said Nicole, "But I'm already here with someone."

She then walked up to Jamie.

"Ready to go?"

As Jamie and Nicole walked away Mike looked totally dejected.

Meanwhile, off to the side another guy continued to watch Quinn and Nicole walk off with their respective dates. This guy was skinny, white, wore a backwards starter cap, lots of bling and had a pencil mustache and goatee.

 _I'm'a so get it in wit' them bitches, yo_ he thought with a grin, _time to pull a robbery_.

` And thus are we presented with that most peculiar specimen of male: the Douchebag Poser.

* * *

**Later...**

Quinn was sitting on a beach towel applying sunscreen while Jim stood and looked at the bay.

"I think I'm gonna take a dip in the water," said Jim, "Care to join me?"

Smiling, Quinn said "In a bit, Jim. I wanna work on my tan first."

Quinn smiled as Jim made his way to the water. She then lay on the towel after setting a timer so she doesn't burn herself. After all, she inherited the sensitive skin of an English woman from her mother's side.

From a dsicreet distance, the poser from before watched Jim leave.

 _Time to make my move_ he thought, _she gone learn how we boyz from tha' hood do_. Ironic given this guys lily white complexion. He approached Quinn.

"What's yo' name, cutie?" he asked.

Taking one look at him, she said "If you don't mind, I'm trying to relax, Mr...?"

"Call me Anton, honey," he said, "An' you is?"

Rolling her eyes, Quinn said "First off, my name's Quinn, not honey. Second, what I 'is' is annoyed."

"Playin' hard ta get," said Anton, "I likes. Whatchu likes, Quinn."

Growing increasingly annoyed, Quinn said "I'll tell you what I don't like, posers hitting on me while I'm trying to relax."

Trying to sound smooth but coming off creepy instead, Anton sat next to Quinn and said "Don' be like dat, Quinny. I just tryin' ta be nice."

Quinn hissed "And failing miserably at it."

"Come on, shauty," said Anton, "Don' you wantz ta knowz what a real G can give yaz?"

"What I want," said Quinn, "Is for you to leave me alone."

Anton was undeterred.

"C'mon, sweet thang. I be tha kinda man ya needz."

Quinn turned toward Anton.

"What I 'needz'," she said, "Is for you to get lost, you creep..." She put her mouth by his ear. "...OR MY BOYFRIEND'S GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!!"

Anton finally got the message.

"A'ight. Fuhget you, den!"

He walked off as Quinn breathed a sigh of relief.

* * *

**At another part of the beach...**

Jamie and Nicole were walking and talking.

"So, Jamie," said Nicole, "You were ont of the famous Three J's?"

Slightly embarrassed, Jamie admitted "Yeah. I still can't believe how dumb I was back then. I missed out on a lot of potential relationships because I wasted four years pursuing Quinn. All three of us did."

Noting the sheepish expression, Nicole said "Don't be embarrassed, Jamie. Quinn just has that effect on people. Besides, it wasn't all a waste. You took her to prom."

Jamie said "True, and that's a lot farther than Joey or Jeffy ever got. Don't get me wrong, I'm long over my crush, I just wish it happened a lot sooner."

Nicole said "Well, better than my prom experience. Oh, wait! That's right, I didn't have one."

Genuinely surprised, Jamie said "You didn't go to your own prom! How come?"

"No one wanted to take me."

Even more surprised, Jamie said "What!? I figured a girl like you would've had guys lining up to take her to prom."

Nicole hoped Jamie didn't notice her blushing as she said "Thanks, but I was a total outcast. Long story."

"I'd like to hear it," said Jamie, "If you wanna tell it, that is."

Nicole was surprised that the memory didn't seem to bother her this time.

"I started out high school as the head cheerleader. I even dated the quarterback. It all fell apart after he cheated on me. I was so upset that at the next game I actually ran out onto the field and kicked him in his cup."

"Remind me not to get on your bad side" Jamie said with a grin.

Stifling a laugh, Nicole said "If I hadn't done that the rest of high school would've turned out different. We lost the game and everyone blamed me. I was kicked off the squad, all my friends turned on me and my jerk of an ex outed me as an anime geek. I spent the rest of high school with no friends whatsoever. It probably didn't help that I was so bitter that I started being a total bitch to everyone."

Nicole was surprised at how comfortable she was telling Jamie all of this.

"How'd you meet Quinn?" Jamie asked.

"We shared a dorm during our first year at Boston State. After that she and Stacy convinced me to pledge with them. It went a long way in getting me over my people issues."

Jamie asked "Why'd you come with her when she moved back to Lawndale?"

Nicole said "Quinn and I were sharing an apartment in Boston when her father had a heart attack and she came back to help take care of him. I followed because I didn't wanna go back to California and had nowhere else to go."

"I'm glad you did," said Jamie, "Otherwise we never would've met." He gasped upon realizing he'd just said that out loud.

Nicole's heart actually skipped a beat.

* * *

**In the water...**

Quinn and Jim were playing in Chesapeake Bay and talking.

"Hey, Jim," said Quinn, "Have you seen Nicole and Jamie?"

"No," said Jim, "I guess those two are really hitting it off."

"Nice," said Quinn, "Those two are so obviously into each other. Looks like it's about to be three couples again."

Jim raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean 'again'?"

Quinn said "Joey and Sandi broke up."

"Can't say I'm surprised," said Jim, "Once the initial spark wore off all they seemed to do was argue."

He noticed the concerned look on his girlfriend's face.

"You're worried the same thing'll happen with Nicole and Jamie, aren't you?"

Quinn nodded.

"I sort of worry about her. I mean, I feel responsible for Nicole, have since college. She had a lot of issues when I first met her."

"I know, you told me," said Jim, "But she's come a long way since then."

"I can't help worrying," said Quinn, "It's like I have this urge to take care of the people I care about."

"I know," said Jim, "That's actually one of the things I love most about you."

Quinn immediately grabbed Jim and kissed him. After the kiss...

"You always know what to say to me, Jim."

They were about to kiss again when...

"What up, shauty!"

Quinn rolled her eyes as Anton was standing right there.

"Didn't I tell you to get lost earlier?"

Jim asked "Who's he?"

Quinn said "His name's Anton. Guy tried to hit on me earlier and it took him forever to figure out I wasn't interested."

"Don' know whatchu missin', bae."

Quinn angrily said "I'm not your 'bae'," she pointed to Jim, "I'm HIS bae. So get lost, you creep."

Anton was undeterred.

"He ain' god nuthin' on a stud like me."

Jim stifled a laugh. He didn't feel the least bit threatened because Anton's so obviously pathetic.

"Anton," said Jim, "You got no chance."

"Whateveah, whitey."

Jim struggled not to laugh.

"Look in the mirror, pal. If you were any whiter you'd be an albino."

Turning to Quinn, Anton said "C'mon, sweet-ass. What's say we ditch this tool?"

Quinn said "What's say you leave us alone?"

"Aw, come on, bae."

Now losing his patience, Jim got in Anton's face.

"She's not interested. Now get lost."

Trying (and failing) to sound tough, Anton said "O' whut, white bread."

Jim growled "Or I kick your ass, poser."

"Whatevz" said a dismissive Anton.

Jim lightly punched Anton's arm as a warning. Even though it was a very weak punch...

"OWWWWW!!!!!"

Anton rubbed his arm.

"Dis ain' over, fool!"

Jim get right in his face.

"Beat it, or the next punch is a real one!"

Anton swam off in an uncomfortable hurry.

Smiling, Quinn said "Thanks, Jim."

* * *

**Further down the beach...**

Nicole and Jamie were sitting on a pier wiggling their toes in the water and continuing to make conversation.

"So, why'd you join the Army?" she asked.

Jamie said "After 9/11 I felt like I had to do something. I didn't enlist right away because the semester had already started, but as soon as it was over I signed up."

Nicole said "That's actually pretty impressive."

"Thanks," said Jamie, "I'm glad it's over for me now, though. All those deployments were starting to mess me up. That's why I left halfway through my second hitch."

Nicole was surprised.

"I thought you got an honorable discharge!?"

"Pending," Jamie explained, "My status until January of 2009 is IRR."

"What's that?" asked Nicole.

"Inactive Ready Reserve," Jamie explained, "It means I'm no longer in the Army but can be called back in at any time. After my last deployment I asked for one because I was starting to get burnt out and my CO knew it. Means that I can live as if honorably discharged until I actually am honorably discharged."

Nicole asked "Don't you ever worry about being called back in and sent back off to war."

Jamie sighed.

"All the time. I try to think about that as little as possible."

"Can you do anything about it?"

"Not without losing my veteran's benefits," said Jamie, "But the odds of it actually happening are pretty low. Who gets called back is done entirely random and so many troops are getting IRR these days that my chances of being called back are about the same as my chances of winning the lottery. At least that's what I tell myself to keep from going crazy with 'what if's'."

Before the conversation could continue...

"Whazzup, yo!"

Jamie and Nicole looked up to find Anton the poser standing right by her.

"Hay, sweetness," Anton said to Nicole, "Howzabout I dip my spare rib in yo' sween 'n' sour sauce, feel me?"

Both Nicole and Jamie are visibly annoyed.

* * *

**Act III**   
**Annapolis Beach...**

Nicole and Jamie had been relaxing on the pier, enjoying one another's company, when Anton showed up. The white guy who acts like a stereotypical black guy was trying to pick up Nicole, much to Jamie's chagrin.

"So, cutie," said Anton as he sat next to Nicole and put an arm around her, "You feelin' it?"

Irritated, Nicole said "Get your hand off of me this instant, you creep."

Anton removed his hand but was otherwise undeterred.

"Hey, bae, plenty 'o' honey's wanna git wid me."

"Yeah, right" said an equally irritated Jamie.

Noticing Jamie for the first time, Anton said "What up, homey?"

Jamie scowled.

"I'm not your homey."

Anton said "My name's Anton. And you are..?"

"Jamie White."

Nicole added "My boyfriend."

Both Anton and Jamie's jaws dropped when Nicole said that. They proceeded to say the exact same thing at the exact same time.

"BOYFRIEND!?!"

"Yes," said Nicole, "boyfriend." For added emphasis she immediately grabbed Jamie and kissed him hard. After the kiss, Nicole turned her attention back to Anton. "So get lost, loser!"

Refusing to take the hint, Anton said "C'mon, shauty. Mebbie I can getz you ta trade up."

Jamie couldn't help laughing.

"You...a trade up! heh...ha...ho...AH...HA..HA...HEH...HEH...AH...HA...I'm sorry, it's just...HA...HO...HO...OH...HO...HEE...HEH..."

Offended, Anton asked "Whaz so funny, fool?"

Over his laughing fit, Jamie said "Come on, man. Look at me." Pointing to his very muscular build (courtesy of six years in Army Infantry) he continued "You honestly think your scrawny pale ass is a trade up!?"

Jamie began to have another laughing fit.

Nicole turned to Anton and said "My man just got out of the Army. He's seen action in both Afghanistan and Iraq and, in case you haven't noticed, he's ripped like Rambo. You, on the other hand, are a delusional tool."

"I ain' scared," Anton bragged, "I be from tha' projects, yo."

Jamie stood up.

"Anton, let me show you something."

Jamie pointed to a tattoo on his left bicep. The tattoo was the head of a bald eagle screaching. Above it was the number 101, below it the word "AIRBOURNE".

"That's the unit I was with in Iraq, 101st Air Assault Division. I spent all three of my deployments fast roping from Blackhawks into to the middle of some of the most intense fire fights of the war."

Anton said "I ain' scared."

Looking him right in the eye, Jamie said "Yes, you are. You act tough to impress girls. You pretend to be a black guy from the ghetto because you think it makes you look like a badass. I'm the real deal. I've been shot at, I've killed men up close and I've seen friends and teammates killed right in front of me. All you've done is gotten in a few fisticuffs where you probably got your ass kicked every time. If you're smart, you'll walk away and leave us alone right now."

Anton started to tremble, knowing full well that not only is Jamie stronger than him but also has years of experience actually fighting to the death.

"A'ight, fuhget you, den."

Anton turned around and walked away in an uncomfortable hurry.

Amazed, Nicole said "Jamie, that was awesome."

Jamie sighed.

"Not my proudest moment."

"Jamie," Nicole asked, "What would you have done if he hadn't backed off?"

"I don't know," said Jamie, "The only reason I even threatened him is because I knew he wouldn't risk an actual fight with me. Guys like that talk a big game, but they're all talk. When it comes time to put up or shut up, they always run away."

Nicole smiled. _I'm officially in love with this guy._

* * *

**Later, at a smoothie stand...**

Quinn and Jim were seated at a shaded outdoor table enjoying a couple of tropical smoothies.

"Sorry I punched that guy in the arm" said Jim.

Shrugging it off, Quinn replied "That's okay, Jim. He had it coming." Quinn looked thoughtful for a second. "He actually reminds me a lot of what Chuck was like back in high school."

Jim said "He really was like that back then?"

Quinn nodded.

"It's hard to believe now, but Stacy's husband was such a creeper that we all called him Upchuck."

"How is it that guy got a girl like Stacy?" asked Jim. "Also, what changed?"

Quinn explained "It actually started when we were Junior's and he was a Senior. He was at the mall one day trying to impress girls with his magic tricks. Stacy turned out to be the one girl who actually was impressed. She wanted to know how he did it so badly that she actually volunteered to be his assistant."

Jim said "You and Sandi must've loved that."

"She didn't tell us," said Quinn, "We found out when we saw them on stage at their first show together. A year later I accidentally walked in on them making out and Stacy told me the whole story. Apparently, Upchuck was just an act he put on to seem more confident. As they got to know each other better they became so into each other that they went from friends to lovers over the course of a year."

Jim said "I guess sometimes the one's sombody who was right there all along."

Quinn stifled a giggle.

"Yeah," said Jim, "That did sound a little dorky."

"It's not that," said Quinn, "I just remembered an incident. The summer after graduation we all spent 4th of July Weekend in Ocean City. Chuck was with us because by then he and Stacy were no longer hiding the fact that they were a couple. They disappeared on us during the firework's show so afterward we all went looking for them. Sandi was the one who found them."

"What's funny about that?" asked Jim.

Quinn said "She found them under a pier. They were having sex in the water."

Jim couldn't help laughing.

"Getting back to now," said Jim after his laughing fit, "I wonder what Nicole and Jamie are up to."

"They must really be hitting it off," said Quinn, "I haven't seen them since they decided to give us some one on one time....and that was a few hours ago."

Finishing his smoothie, Jim asked "Think we should look for them."

"Might as well" said Quinn.

* * *

**Later...**

Jamie and Nicole were swimming in the bay. They came to a point where they could stand in the water.

"Damn," said an impressed Jamie, "You certainly haven't let yourself go since cheerleading."

"Thanks," said Nicole, "You're in pretty decent shape yourself."

Standing in the shallow water they looked at each other.

"Nicole," said Jamie, "Why did you tell that guy I was your boyfriend?"

Blushing, Nicole said "It seemed like the best way to make him back off."

Her tone made it clear it was an excuse, and Jamie wasn't buying it.

Seeing the 'yeah, right' expression, Nicole admitted "Um...Actually, that wasn't planned. I...um...well...it sort of just came out."

Jamie sighed.

"Nicole, I...well...I like you. Um..."

Words escaped him.

"Jamie," Nicole said, "I...well...I need to tell you something." After taking a breath to steel her nerves, Nicole went on. "I've actually been crushing on you since I first saw you at that party Chuck and Stacy threw for you a few months ago. Um...And the more I get to know you the more I seem to fall for you. I mean, I've never fallen this hard or this fast in my life. Um...I kind of eavesdropped on you after that freakout and...um..."

Embarrassed, Jamie said "You...You overheard that!?!" Now crushed, he said "You think I'm a psycho now, don't you?"

"Jamie, no," said Nicole, "Quite the opposite, actually. I know what a trauma war can be. I'd actually be worried if you didn't come back a little messed up. It just means you're human."

Relieved, Jamie said "Thanks, Nicole."

Nicole said "I mentioned it because that's when I started to think my attraction to you is more than physical. I wasn't the least bit weirded out by the fact that you have issues."

"I'm getting better," said Jamie, "Therapy helps, so does having friends like you, Quinn, Jim and everyone else."

Now looking sad, Nicole asked "Just friends?"

Jamie decided to tell her the whole truth.

"Nicole, I've been attracted to you since I first saw you. The only reason I never asked you out is I was afraid you'd say no. I mean, you're incredible. You're smart, you're nice, you do your own thing and live life on your own terms. You're the most amazing woman I've ever met."

As they spoke, they moved closer.

"And you're the most amazing man I've ever met" Nicole said breathlessly.

"I...well...I've never felt it as strongly for any other girl as I feel it for you."

They move closer.

"I feel like I can tell you anything."

Closer still.

"Being around you makes it feel like my problems go away."

Their faces were almost touching.

"Jamie."

"Nicole."

Finally, their lips met and they kissed.

On the shore, Quinn and Jim stood and watched the makeout session with knowing smiles. Suddenly, something caught Jim's eye.

"Hey, Quinn," he said in a sly tone, "I think today's about to go from great to perfect."

Quinn looked in the direction Jim was pointing. She saw Anton strutting toward a group of black guys hanging out.

Approaching, Anton said "Yo, whazzup my niggas?"

All six of the black guys instantly dropped what they were doing and crowded around Anton.

"What did you just call us!?"

Not realizing how much trouble he's in, Anton said "Relax, homey, we cool. I jus' wants ta chill wit my niggas."

Another of the black guys barked "Best step back and watch your mouth, asshole!"

"Hey, we cool" said Anton.

Another black guy said "No, we ain't."

"C'mon" said Anton, "I's a'ight, nigga."

They proceeded to kick Anton's poser ass.

(Author's note: apologies for use of the N word. I'm hoping it's not a big deal given the context, but just in case.)

* * *

**Lawndale, that evening...**

The rest of the day went off just fine (except for Anton, obviously). Quinn, Jim, Nicole and Jamie were now in her car heading home. They arrived at Nicole's apartment first.

"Here we are" said Quinn.

Nicole said "I had fun today. Thanks for setting this up, you guys."

"No problem" said Jim with a smile.

Jamie said "I'll call you later, Nicole."

Grinning, Nicole said "Actually, Jamie, I was wondering if maybe you'd like to come up. We could hang out some more."

"You sure?" saked Jamie.

Nicole didn't hesitate.

"Yes."

Quinn and Jim exchanged knowing smiles.

* * *

**Pizza King, a few days later...**

Quinn and Nicole were eating pizza and talking.

"So," said Quinn, "I guess you and Jamie are a couple now."

Nodding, Nicole said "Yes. He's amazing. I've never had a relationship that felt this right."

"No surprise there," said Quinn, "You and Jamie are actually perfect for each other."

Beaming, Nicole said "I actually got him into anime that night at my apartment. I've never been so in tune with a guy in my life. I just have this feeling it's the start of something special."

Quinn said "It was the same with Jim and I. I love him."

Nicole said "We watched anime and talked all night long."

"Just talk?" asked Quinn with a sly grin.

Knowing what she was getting at, Nicole said "We did that too...and it was amazing. We seem to click perfectly in all areas of intimacy, emotional and physical."

Quinn said "Welcome to the world of relationship bliss."

Nicole raised her soda.

"Amen to that, sister."

Quinn and Nicole clinked their drinks together in a toast.

"To great boyfriends" said Quinn.

**The End.**


End file.
